Thoughts Your Lover Has But Never Tells You
6) “You know how you think S&M is kind of weird? It kind of turns me on”
When you develop legitimate feelings for someone, a protective instinct can sometimes take over where you want to shield them from anything you perceive as dirty or risque. I can’t tell you how many men I have heard say they refuse oral sex from their wives because they can’t separate the idea of a wife (and possible mother of children) that they love and respect from a sexually uninhibited sex partner. In extreme cases, men have sought prostitutes to relieve these urges since it eliminates the need to separate sexual acts that they may view as risque from someone they care about. If you suspect that this may be an issue in a relationship it’s best to talk about limits and things that both partners may be willing to try. When your lover expresses interest in something that’s a bit a different, use caution when initially reacting so they won’t feel uncomfortable or ashamed.