Queen Latifah Talks “Numbing” Herself With Alcohol In The Past To Deal With Molestation And Her Brother’s Death

December 12, 2013  |  

Queen Latifah is having a pretty awesome year. Her talk show is a huge hit, and she’s happier than ever. But she wasn’t always feeling on top of the world. Queen La opened up to Good Housekeeping about going through a state of depression in the mid ’90s that had her numbing herself with alcohol. This sadness was brought on by the death of her brother, Lance Jr., who died in a car accident in 1992, riding the motorcycle she bought him. It was also amplified when she was carjacked and her good friend who was riding with her almost died after being shot the carjacker. Here’s what Latifah had to say about how she dealt with that time:

“My life was rocked to the core. And I felt guilty because I was angry at God.

Drinking a bunch of alcohol, numbing myself. Every day I would be faded, like a painting that’s just not vibrant, whose edges are dull. I wasn’t living my full life.”

After she was arrested in 1996 for driving with marijuana and a loaded gun (which she had to protect herself after the carjacking), she took the advice of good friend Jada Pinkett Smith and sought therapy to deal with her depression. By doing so, many things that she was hiding inside came to light, including pain from being molested when she was a five-year-old by her babysitter. The therapy was the first step to her getting back to happy.

“We ignore our feelings a lot, I realize. Many of us have to…until they really bite us in the butt. What set me free was looking at it from a different perspective. I was 5, manipulated and afraid. You have to say something. The power of those who perpetrate the abuse is your fear and your shame…and that’s unacceptable.”

She also came to grips with the loss of her brother through her faith in God:

“I was continuously praying. I realized that wasn’t helping me or my brother. I learned that God was going to provide comfort; I know He is always listening and guiding.

I got this little message in my head that I feel was from God. It was as clear as day, like a voice that said to me, Dana, don’t let it all go, because you’re gonna get through this. Nobody is perfect. I know that I’m not a saint, but God’s love is there for me. I know that I need help to make it through every day, so I pray to God to help me do the best I can, to lift me up when I am tired and help me develop into the person He wants me to be…I am always surrounded by His love, and He is always there.”

Looooove Queen! Check out her full interview with Good Housekeeping here and let us know what you think of her story.


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