The 15 Worst Movies Of 2013
What do aging action heroes, needless sequels, and the biggest ensemble cast ever created have in common? They were all a part of some of the worst movies of 2013.
15. Battle Of The Year
Dance movies can be a hit or miss and this year’s Battle of the Year was a sure-fire miss. The 3D dance flick follows two friends trying to put together a B-boy crew to win the upcoming Battle of the Year. Starring Laz Alonso and Chris Brown, Battle of the Year failed to recoup the $20 million it cost to make by pulling in only $12 million at the box office.
14. G.I. Joe: Retaliation
Normally watching Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and his muscles run around in a tank top for two hours is enjoyable but even he couldn’t save G.I. Joe: Retaliation. The nonstop action in the sequel to 2009’s G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra overshadowed the storyline, making the film hard to follow. It didn’t help matters that the storyline was too confusing and nonsensical to begin with. Despite the negative reviews, G.I. Joe: Retaliation still brought in over $375 million worldwide and talk of another sequel is in the works.
13. Grown Ups 2
Adam Sandler has never been considered a great thespian and most of his movies rely on crude humor and immature jokes. That was the case with 2010’s Grown Ups, which co-starred Chris Rock, David Spade and Kevin James, which managed to rake in at the box office, setting the stage for the sequel. Grown Ups 2 found the same cast with similar jokes and gags. Sandler’s fans still came out in droves to support their favorite funnyman helping the film earn almost $250 million worldwide, but we weren’t impressed.
12. The Hangover Part III
In the original they conquered Las Vegas. For part two, they took the party to Bangkok, Thailand. The third installment of the massively successful Hangover franchise found the Wolfpack traveling to Arizona. While the first two films were laugh out loud riots, Hangover Part III was void of the magic that audiences — and critics — were looking for. Thankfully, there will be no part four and the franchise will end with Part III.
11. A Haunted House
Comedian Marlon Wayans is used to spoofing movies and this time he tackles the genre of found footage films for A Haunted House. Wayans and his girlfriend (Essence Atkins) move into a new home only to find out there are already occupants there of the spiritual kind. Cedric the Entertainer and Affion Crockett co-star in this debacle of a film and provide the few laughs in the hour and a half long movie. Despite the overwhelmingly bad reviews, a sequel is slated to hit theaters in 2014.
10. I’m In Love With A Church Girl
Ja Rule spent some time in prison for tax evasion and weapons possession but before he went in, the rapper/actor managed to shoot the film I’m In Love with a Church Girl. Rule plays reformed drug trafficker Miles Montego who falls in love with church going Vanessa Leon, played by Adrienne Bailon. Barely finding an audience, the movie made just $2.4 million at the box office.
9. The Lone Ranger
The Lone Ranger was a hugely popular radio series then a television series back in the day, so turning it into a blockbuster film should have been a no brainer. However what works in theory doesn’t always work in reality. The film, which stars Johnny Depp, was plagued with problems from the beginning and was even briefly canceled. The movie raked in nearly $260 million worldwide when it was finally released, but considering the budget was $250 million with an extra $150 million in marketing, studio executives were not too happy to be in the red.
8. Scary Movie 5
When the original Scary Movie hit theaters back in 2000, the film had audiences rolling with laughter so much it was only natural to create a sequel. Thirteen years and four sequels later, the franchise is still trudging along but without the stars that made the original film so popular. Scary Movie 5 marks the first time Anna Faris and Regina Hall are absent in any of the sequels. Good thing, too, because the Wayans brother bailed several sequels before that. Katt Williams, Charlie Sheen, Snoop Dogg, Mike Tyson and Lindsay Lohan tried their best to bring in the laughs but the film just could not be salvaged.
7. Oz The Great And Powerful
Sometimes the best films are based on classic literature. Too bad that’s not the case with Oz The Great and Powerful. Based on L. Frank Baum’s Oz novels, while also paying homage to the 1939 film The Wizard of Oz, the film focuses on Oscar Diggs, otherwise known as the Wizard of Oz himself, as he tries to restore order and keep the three witches in check. While the film was lauded for its visual effects, the storyline was bashed for its inconsistency.
6. The Last Stand
Arnold Schwarzenegger became one of the biggest film action heroes on the planet back in the day. Thirty years later the former governor of California still insists on trying to convince audiences he’s still got it. Unfortunately, he does not, as evidenced by The Last Stand. Co-starring Forest Whitaker and Johnny Knoxville, the once physically fit star seemed to be moving in slow motion. The action flick barely made $48 million at the box office, a low number for any Schwarzenegger or action movie.
5. Movie 43
Movie 43 has the bragging rights of being the biggest ensemble cast ever created. So you would think that a movie starring Halle Berry, Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Richard Gere, Common, Uma Thurman and Kristen Bell, just to name a few, would be box office gold, right? Wrong. Movie 43 had too many moving parts with 16 different storylines. The film took in just $4.8 million at the box office opening weekend.
4. Man Of Steel
Blockbuster films about comic book heroes are usually a slam-dunk at the box office but Christopher Nolan had a tough time selling Man of Steel to Superman fans. Man of Steel focused on Superman’s origins with actor Henry Cavill as the man in the red cape. Although Man of Steel was the highest grossing Superman movie ever with more than $600 million in ticket sales, critics panned the film for being underwhelming with underdeveloped characters.
3. After Earth
Will Smith has been grooming his son Jaden to follow in his footsteps to become a successful actor and action hero star. While the younger Smith received much praise and acclaim for his role in the remake of The Karate Kid, his next film didn’t do nearly as well for his career. After Earth stars the father-son duo in their second film together. They crash land on an abandoned Earth and Jaden is forced to battle aliens and predators alone in a quest to save his father. After Earth made a paltry $27 million during its opening weekend, a disappointing figure for Hollywood heavyweight Will Smith.
2. Tyler Perry Presents Peebles
Actress Kerry Washington landed the role of a lifetime as Olivia Pope in ABC’s hit show “Scandal.” However, her role in Tyler Perry Presents Peebles wasn’t so well received. Washington plays Grace, who brings her boyfriend, played by Craig Robinson, home to meet her parents at their vacation home in Sag Harbor. Think Meet the Parents meets Inkwell but with a lot less laughs or heartfelt emotion. The film barely made $10 million at the box office and was only in theaters for a month.
1. Tyler Perry’s Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor
Tyler Perry found fame, fortune, and a major audience when he donned a dress to play Madea. Giving his most famous character a rest, Perry adapted his play The Marriage Counselor for his latest film and although he received a lot of flack for casting Kim Kardashian, the criticism should’ve been reserved for how boring and predictable the movie was. Starring Jurnee Smollet-Bell, Lance Gross, Brandy and Vanessa Williams, Temptation received negative reviews but still managed to become Perry’s highest grossing film that he hasn’t starred in.