How To Get Out Of A Dating Rut

December 18, 2013  |  
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When you jump into the dating scene, no one thinks about the negative side of dating; instead, we try to keep positive thoughts from day one and forward. However, dating doesn’t always work out like it should. Sometimes we aren’t able to find a relationship and rid ourselves of being single while others deal with failed dates. When the negative side of things comes to the surface, it’s easy to start to feel hopeless. Here are 14 ways to get out of a dating rut.

Have some me time

When you’re in a dating rut, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to have some me time. Go spend a day at the spa or go buy some shoes that you’ve been dying to add to your collection. Giving yourself some me time will allow you to reconnect and reground. Me time also takes your mind off of your dating problems.

Take a break

Once you’ve gotten yourself into a dating rut, it’s wise to take a break from dating altogether. Even if you want nothing more than a boyfriend, dating while in a rut will rarely result in success. Take a break from dating and allow yourself to begin to feel better and happier inside.

Consider a new path

Before getting back into the dating scene, take a step back and observe the dating path that you’ve been taking. Have you only been talking to guys you meet at local bars and clubs? Are you only talking to men who have been introduced to you by others? If so, now is the best time to switch things up and do things differently. Try a new way of dating, such as online dating or speed dating.

Don’t put off things that make you happy

Maybe you’ve been looking to take a cooking class or maybe you’ve always wanted to go zip-lining, but you’re waiting to do so when you have someone to enjoy and experience it with. However, when you’re in a dating rut and single, there’s no need to put things off that make you happy. If a certain activity would perk you up, do it. Don’t wait until there’s a man in your life.

Don’t be a yes woman

It’s very common for most women to become yes women when they enter the dating world. Though you may want to get the most bang for your buck, when it comes to dating, it isn’t wise to say yes to every man who asks you out on a date. If a man isn’t everything you’re looking for, don’t settle just because it’s a nice thing to do and because he meets most of your wants and needs.

Figure out the pattern

Typically when you’re in a dating rut, it’s because you’re following some pattern that is leading you to the same end-results. Take a step back and figure out what this pattern is. Are you dating the same men over and over? Are you settling for second best? Figuring out your pattern and breaking it will help you leave your dating rut behind.

Talk it out

It’s more likely than not that some of your best girlfriends have also been in a dating rut at some point in time. Don’t keep your thoughts and emotions to yourself. Instead, talk them out and see what kind of advice you’re given. Some of the best results often comes from those who have been there done that. Talk about your feelings and thoughts and if anything, you’ll feel a lot better.

Don’t blame yourself

When you’re already in a dating rut, you’re most likely to put all of the blame on yourself. Bad dates and failed dates are all part of the dating game. No one goes into the dating world without some sort of bad experience. Don’t blame yourself or think that you’re the only one who is going through this. Realize that it’s common and you aren’t alone.

Try someone new

Maybe you’ve only been dating highly professional men who are extremely stuffy. Instead of sticking to this same old man, consider trying someone new. Find a man who is goofy or try dating someone who isn’t your cookie cutter guy. This will allow you to experience something new and, who knows, maybe this new guy will be the one that’s best for you.

Work on your self-esteem

Dating and self-esteem go hand-in-hand. If you have low self-esteem, you’re unlikely to have complete success when it comes to dating. Before jumping back into the dating world after being in a dating rut, take some time to work on you. Make sure that you’re in touch with yourself and that you love yourself inside and out before dating again.

Start networking

If you’re in a dating rut because you’ve been unable to meet a new man in a few months, now is a good time to start networking. Network online, through your friends, and anywhere else that is appropriate. Networking is one of the best ways to meet new people in hopes of finding a man who you are able to connect and click with. Get your name and face out there!

Remember all the options you have

A lot of women get themselves into a dating rut because they don’t realize that when it comes to dating, the options are truly endless. To break out of a dating rut, remember all of the options that you have in the dating scene. You can go anywhere, meet any guy, and do anything you want. By expanding your horizons, you expand your dating possibilities.

Don’t compare yourself

While you’re closest friends may all be in relationships, don’t let yourself get to the point where you are comparing yourself to them and putting yourself down. Just because everyone else is in a relationship doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you because you aren’t. Keep your eye on the prize and stay positive.

Make wise choices

Always keep your wants and needs in mind. To avoid digging yourself into an even deeper rut, always keep your eyes open for red flags and warning signs. Don’t let desperation set in as this will only set you up for failure. Be sure that your dating decisions are well thought-out and are positive choices for you.

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