“If You Have To Say You’re A Lady, You Aren’t:” Estelle On Her Dealbreakers With People

November 5, 2013  |  



From Essence 

Grammy-award winning singer Estelle is in the mood for love. Well, sort of. This summer she released part one of her three volume EP,Love & Happiness, called Love Jones. The second installment,Waiting to Exhale dropped in September and the third and final offering, How Stella Got Her Groove Back, will be released later this month. Each portion was named after her favorite romantic movies, and on each track Estelle approaches matters of the heart from a single woman’s perspective and sings her heart out in her usual fierce and bold fashion.

We caught up with our favorite diva-about-town, a self-proclaimed “relationship girl” who ended a relationship a few years ago that took some time to bounce back from, and found out what she enjoys about the single girl lifestyle and how she navigates the modern dating world. As always, Ms. Estelle did not hold back!

ESSENCE.com: What do you love about being single and fabulous?
ESTELLE: It’s a new thing for me. I’m a relationship girl. The positives are that you get to date and you get to be taken out places. That’s awesome.

ESSENCE.com: You say this is new for you. Did you just end a relationship?
ESTELLE: No, it was a couple years ago, but I was in the relationship for two years. They say it takes half the time you were in a relationship to get over it. So basically, I’m finally over it. You know, when you hit that point where you’re like, I don’t feel anything anymore when their name is mentioned.

ESSENCE.com: Do you enjoy having multiple suitors at the same time?
ESTELLE: I sure do. It’s a fantastic ego boost on days when you wake up and your hair is disheveled. (Laughs!)

ESSENCE.com: What would a guy have to do to impress you on a date?
ESTELLE: Not talk about himself for four hours. Like, my God. It would be interesting to hear your views on the world, the news and current events—you know, other things besides him. At this point in my life I’m looking for a partner and husband not a boyfriend.

ESSENCE.com: When you meet a guy do you check him out on Instagram? Are there certain “red flags” you look for?
ESTELLE: Absolutely. I check to see if his past relationships have been published on Instagram or on Twitter, and if they have, no ma’am—I’m good on that! It’s kind of a precursor to what your life is going to look like together. I feel like Instagram and Twitter are your virtual life. On Instagram, you’re the person you think you are. For a regular, guy I look at his feed and I’m always like, ‘ok you believe you’re that person.’ If he takes multiple selfies, I’m good. What are you doing with your life? Again, it shows me you’re self-obsessed. If you say you’re a lady, you aren’t. If you have to say you’re cute, you’re not.

Read more at Essence.com 

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