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In a new chapter of the cougar files (kidding!), actress Vivica A. Fox spoke with BET recently about the state of her love life, and why she’s trying to be worried more about what’s inside of a man as opposed to what he’s got going on, on the outside. If you’ll recall, she was in a pretty serious relationship with Atlanta party promoter Omar “Slim” White that culminated in an engagement. But after 10 months of planning for their future, he called the whole thing off, saying it had nothing to do with the 20 year age difference, but that they simply grew apart:

“She’s a good woman, it’s just one of those situations where in life people outgrow each other. I’m highly intelligent, very wise and one thing I hate is negativity and drama, I hate arguing, and I value communication no matter what the problem may be. So as in any relationship, tension can build up and I finally had to walk away. I was only in it for love and it just didn’t work out. Even though she was older than me the age difference didn’t play a part.”

She didn’t comment on his claims (though she says SHE broke up with him), but it’s clear now that she’s learned from that past relationship, is ready to date again and wants it to be less about the physical. Here’s what she told BET:

“I used to be so lustful. I would lose my mind over a six pack and a smile, it would get me every time and usually get me in trouble. Pretty eyes, pretty teeth? Forget about it! But, I think now I’m looking for a good partner, just a good man, whereas before it would be mostly physical. Now, I need a man who’s a gentleman, more old-fashioned. Someone who I could laugh with and have fun with. I’m trying to date above 30 now. Thirty to 35 is the window. Not saying I won’t make an exception if someone special comes along, though! [Laughs]“ “The best part is waking up every day and being able to do whatever I want. I don’t have to answer to anybody, ain’t nobody quizzing Vivica about where she’s going or what she’s doing! But seriously, it’s been a couple of years now since I broke up with my fiancé, and I think I’m ready to start dating again.”

And who are Viv’s celebrity crushes?

“Oh, a combination of Idris Elba and Blair Underwood. Idris I like because he’s European, a little bit more worldly. Blair, I know him personally and I know he’s such a wonderful person, just a good man and a good father. He’s just got that man swagger!”

I think many of us have lessons that we learned from dating younger or older, and it seems Vivica is ready to let love in again. What kind of man do you think would be a good match for the 49-year-old?

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