ABC Medical Reporter Writes The Dumbest Article Ever, “Twerking: A Scientific Explanation”

August 27, 2013  |  

Would it be rude to start this article with a “shut the eff up”?

That was honestly my first reaction to the ABC “news” article, “Twerking: A Scienftic Explanation” when I saw it on the television network’s website this afternoon. As you probably already guessed, right below that headline appeared a photo of Miley Cyrus twerking during the MTV VMA Awards, and directly beneath that read one of the sorriest articles I’ve seen in a long time. Here it is in its short entirety:

Twerking is such a complex, technical subject, only a Ph.D. researcher can explain how the body does what it does to make it happen.

Twerking is a combination movement involving a deep squat and a pelvic tilt, Michelle Olson, a professor of exercise science and a certified strength and conditioning coach at Auburn University in Montgomery, Ala., explained.

“You take a wide stance with your legs turned out at 10 and 2 so your hips are externally rotated,” she said. “Then you pulse up and down as you thrust the pelvis bone forward and back.”

Olson said the booty dancing move is a good “twerkout” for your butt and thighs. It also works the deep muscles of the hips and the core muscles of the lower back and abdominals. She said it will definitely shape and strengthen all those muscles as well as give them the stamina to do activities important to most people heavily involved in twerking like say, picking up a screaming child off the floor.

However, over-twerking might throw out the lower back or make the knees creak, Olson cautioned.

Translation? If you’re over 25, twerking may not be for you.

I would outline everything that’s wrong with this piece but then I’d be just as guilty as ABC for overanaylzing foolishness for the sake of being trendy. And hey, who needs another reminder that cultural misappropriation is alive and well on this lovely afternoon? Not I.

One good word of advice did come out of the last sentence of that article though, but I’d like to change a word to say, “If you’re over 25, twerking is not be for you.”  Just sayin.’

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