Watch What You Drink And Don’t Wear Something Hoochified: What To Do And Not To Do On A First Date

August 12, 2013  |  
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Perusing through the essentials of dating can be something like an obstacle course. You won’t find the guy of your dreams from your couch, but you’re not looking forward to wasting your time with dinners and pointless conversation. When you’re ready to put yourself out there in the world of dating, take this into account- you will find the good, the bad and ugly. Here are a few tips that will make dating fun and innocent. Who knows, Mr. Right may come around earlier than expected.

Do: Have An Open Mind

Everyone wants to make a good first impression when they meet someone, which means you won’t be meeting the real him on a first date. Keep an open mind and remember to play it cool. If you’re relaxed, your date will go smoother and the night won’t be a lost cause.

Don’t: Talk About Random, Meaningless Stuff. Focus On Learning About One Another 

Whether or not you’re friends on social media, talking about celebrities and other people you don’t know can be a bore. Do you think he really cares about what happened at the Love and Hip Hop reunion? Or if he’s continuously talking about his likes and followers on Instagram, he may be a little into himself, and not into you. Spend time talking about the more substantial things you have in common to save time and energy.

Do: Wear Something That’s Comfortable For You

Heels, Flats, the LBD, or the convenient skinny jeans, just as long as you’re comfortable, it shouldn’t matter what you wear. Dress for the occasion and remember to keep it classy. You don’t need to wear heels and a ballgown, or the tightest ensemble in your closet for dinner and a movie. Do what works for you, but not the absolute most.

Don’t: Be Too Nice…And Easy 

After a nice first date, a few drinks, and a case of “mysteriously missing keys,” he wants to come back to your place. Not only is it the the cheesiest move of all time, if you’re too nice you may just fall for it. Don’t let him have all the power on the date. Keep in mind all the moves he’s pulling on you. They’ve worked before and he’s convinced that it will work on you. If you get down like that, by all means, be safe and have fun! But if not, don’t let him know where you live and don’t follow him home so soon. That could end badly in every sense of the word.


Do: But Be Nice

If you’re nice, he may open up a bit. If you’re extra skeptical and treat him like he’s at an interview instead of a date, the night could end sooner than you would like. Know how far you’ll go and set boundaries on the first date, but open up in OTHER ways so that he knows the type of guy you’re looking for and you can find out more about what he’s about and possibly make a good thing happen.

Don’t: Drink Too Much

If you’re having a nice dinner, don’t order a Sex On The Beach or too many Long Island Ice Teas. It’s not only a disaster waiting to happen, but you’re sending the wrong message. A glass of wine is harmless, and you’ll be able to take get yourself home with no problem. All in all, know your limits and your tolerance for alcohol. You don’t want to be loose as a goose, giggling like a schoolgirl or sloppy drunk when getting to know someone.

Do: Always Have Your Own Money Ready

Some tips should go without saying, but a lot of my fellow gal pals expect the guy to pay for the first date and don’t even bring any real money with them. You don’t have to throw your hands in the air to claim your independence, and it also looks good if you want to help buy a round of drinks. Keep your wallet close. It shows that you don’t expect him to take care of you and you can take care of yourself.

Don’t: Brag About Yourself

You know you’re awesome and that’s great. You want to talk about yourself, but do it in a humble way. If you brag and carry on about how well your career is going, or the classes you took overseas, and all the big things you have going on, you leave little to talk about later on. Which leads to…

Do: Listen

Listening! It’s the best thing for you and for him. You get to find out if he’s a viable candidate for a second date and it shows that you aren’t in love with yourself. Listening and learning about your date will prevent you from finding yourself in dating disasters, and will help you see the traits you want to see in Mr. Right. If he lets you know what he does and doesn’t want, you will know upfront instead of assuming he’s looking to settle down sooner than later just because you are.

Don’t: Expect Too Much From A Stranger

Remember: it’s a date, not an interview. It’s important to know his career goals and favorite music, but you don’t need to know the age he wants to get married and his credit score. During the first date, you’re really just trying to get to know the basics about one another. And just as you wouldn’t want someone asking you about single thing you do and don’t have going on in your life, you shouldn’t shouldn’t expect that from this new fella. Dating can be fun if you let it be, so let your hair down and remember to have a good time!

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