It Happens To The Best Of Us — But Doesn’t Have To: How To Avoid Getting Stood Up On A Date

June 21, 2013  |  
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Dating is daring, exciting, and anxiety-filled all at once. Some dates you go on will be down right amazing, while others will be completely terrible. And some dates will be intricately planned, while others may never happen at all. Getting stood up on a date is pretty frustrating but it can happen to the best of us. There’s nothing more embarrassing than getting all dolled up for a date, only for him to never show. Here are 14 ways to avoid getting stood up in the future.


Keep in contact

So you two planned a date a week in advance but you haven’t heard from him in four days. If you haven’t kept in close contact with him, leaving for the date isn’t ideal. Make sure that you two have confirmed your date plans the day of the date. otherwise he may have forgotten or is planning to set you up. If you get no response, cancel the date and move on.

Have a set waiting time

Lets say that your date starts at 6:00 pm and by 6:20pm, you haven’t heard a thing from your date. When it comes to a planned date, don’t wait around for any longer than half an hour. Why waste your time waiting for someone who is not only late, but may never come? Set a length of time that you’re willing to wait and then head out.

Be a little late

On the other hand, you can also play with time by being a little late. Of course, don’t be an hour late to a date, but maybe arrive 5 or 10 minutes later than originally planned. This way you aren’t waiting around forever if your date decides not to show up. Give him 20 minutes past your set date time and if he doesn’t show, go on about your day. If he calls you later that night with an explanation, don’t buy into it. He blew you off.

Be honest

Honesty is important when you’re dating. Make sure that when you’re getting to know someone, you’re telling him the truth about who you really are. Don’t put on a facade or else you risk being exposed and being stood up when he Google stalks you — and you know he will. Be you so that you aren’t caught in a lie and made a fool of when the day comes for the date you planned.

Make sure he knows you’re interested

Some guys may chicken out and leave you hanging on a date if they don’t think you’re entirely interested. Make sure that your date knows that you aren’t looking to spend time with him just because, but instead you want to go on another date to get to know him better and because you enjoy his company. Make your feelings and intentions well known.

Pick a place you are both familiar with

Not all guys are looking to stand you up purposefully. It’s easy to get lost when you’re in an unfamiliar location. When planning a date, be sure you two make it at a location that you two both know. Having him drive an hour out of his town to meet you somewhere may not go over well. Keep it local and familiar.

Ask him to pick you up

This isn’t the best stance for a first date, but if you’ve already been on a date with this guy and you feel comfortable around him, don’t hesitate to ask him to pick you up. Have him meet you at the coffee shop near your house or somewhere public if you don’t want him to know where you live just yet. This makes waiting, and being stood up, a lot less embarrassing. Plus you’re in a familiar location.

Contact him when you arrive

Instead of sitting around and waiting for your date to arrive, be sure to text or call him when you arrive. This way he knows that you are there and that you aren’t standing him up! Of course, if he doesn’t respond, then it may be time to start plotting an exit plan. But, at least give him the courtesy of telling him that you have arrived.

Listen to his words

Does he talk negatively about his past dates? Has he mentioned standing up a girl before? Does he claim he’s a little rough around the edges and can sometimes be an a**? If that’s the case, avoid the date at all costs. He’s clearly trying to send you signals and signs that he may just be playing and toying around with you.

What is your gut telling you?

When you talk to this guy, does he seem interested, or does he seem more interested in dragging you along during his game? When you talk and interact with someone, it’s always best to go with your gut feeling. If you’re feeling uneasy or unsure of this guy, break it off before the day of the date comes. Your gut is always right.

Does he seem too good to be true?

This usually stands true for online dating, but if a guy seems to be too good to be true, he probably is. Sorry, but it’s rare that you’ll come across a male model millionaire who is part of an online dating site, let alone interested in dating someone outside of the industry. When things appear to be way too perfect, it’s likely that it’s all a set up. You may find yourself stood up by a guy who was faking all along.

Let him follow through

Did he say that he’ll text you to confirm the date? Did he mention that he’d keep in touch with you to make sure that the plans you two set still work for him? When a guy says he’ll do something, let him follow through with it. If he doesn’t, the ball is in your court. You can either go on the date and risk getting stood up or stay home.

Don’t assume anything

Dating and assuming just don’t mix. Just because a guy seemed interested in you last week doesn’t mean he is today. Emotions and relationships change, and while things may have been good then, they may not be the same now. Before assuming anything, always confirm. He may be more interested in someone else now, therefore in the end you’d be stood up.

Turn it around

If you do somehow get stood up on a date, don’t let it bring you down. Being stood up is hard to predict. Instead of dwelling on it, delete this guy from your phone, and invite your girls out to meet you. Enjoy dinner together or hit up the mall and do some therapeutic shopping. This way you can turn a bad experience into a good one.

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