A Sista’s Summer Survival Guide: 3 Things You Need To Get Away From Street Macks Trying To Get Your Number (Or Drawls)
Blame it on the fact that we had a much-longer (and messier) winter than we needed, but it seems that everybody is geeked up about summer. We’re not there just yet, but the minute we hit some surprising 90+ degree days here in New York City, legs came out, swimsuits were worn with shorts down the street like actual clothing, and as the women in my own neighborhood sauntered around comfortable and confident, the street macks stepped out of their lairs (their mom’s basements maybe?), ready to spit their game on the corners of our streets. For many women (who live in areas where people, especially men, like to stand outside all times of the day and night), that might be the worst part of summer (that and the uncomfortable heat waves); the eyes ogling you, the comments made about your body that are more crude than compliment, the many on-the-go propositions made as you walk your fastest home from work. Every woman loves a good compliment, but not a compliment delivered in the hopes of getting more out of you than you’re trying to give (like a date…or a romp in the sack). We’ve all had to deal with this in one way or another, and with summer around the corner, sista, you had better be prepared to deal with it again. But you don’t have to be susceptible to the hisses, the grabs for the arm, the backhanded compliments and more if you don’t want to be. Here are a few things you should have with you this summer, the minute you pull out the high-waisted shorts, body-con dresses and tight skirts. They’re watching…
A good pair of headphones are a girl’s best friend. A phone used to be the only tech gadget you needed to get street macks to leave you alone, but the thirstiest are bold enough to try and holler at you while you’re conversing with your mother about something important: “Excuse me Miss, EXCUSE ME.” So put on your earbuds, your Beats by Dre, whatever you have, and walk fast. Make it very clear that you have this on and turn your music up high. That way, everyone can see that you’re unable to hear them, and chances are, if they interrupt you, it’s a warning that they won’t get the response they’re hoping for. If you’re like my co-workers, even if you don’t listen to music with them on, just having them in your ears as you walk down a too crowded street is the excuse you need: “Oh you said something?? Can’t hear you, sorry…” Do the whole finger-point to your ear AND a continuous head-bob as you keep it moving.
A Friend (Especially a Male Friend)
A female friend is okay, because you can have a thorough conversation, or pretend you’re having one when a mack, or worse, a group of street macks, come along asking for your name and number. But I’ve found that a man, whether it’s your actual boyfriend or just a male friend in general, will get you the respect you’re looking for. While someone might try and talk to me about my breast when I walk by myself (trust me, it has happened), with my boyfriend in tow while moving through those “hotspot” places, no one has anything to say. He’s not the buffest, biggest guy in the world, but most men (at least in my neighborhood), know better than to try and come on another man’s territory, let alone try to speak to his lady or stare to hard at her in front of them. Unless you’re dealing with a complete fool/goon, it’s kind of like guy code…
A Good Attitude
While you might think that your best bet is to ignore, ignore, ignore, I’ve actually found that this unwanted scenario of the hideous dude from down the street trying to spit game doesn’t have to end as badly as you think. But when you treat people who are clearly speaking to you (and you don’t have headphones on at the time) like they don’t exist right in front of your eyes, the reaction you receive could get ugly. Like, “B***h, you’re not cute anyway” ugly. Just this morning after a walk around my neighborhood, even with my headphones, a man tried to stop me. Thinking maybe I dropped something since I was sweating like a slave, he went on to say I looked “Strong and Se*y.” Ew. I could have said “ew” and kept it moving, but I said, “Thanks, but I have to go. Have a good day.” Headphones went back in, feelings weren’t hurt. I was able to shut things down within 10 seconds. I know my temper, and the last thing I want is an embarrassed man cursing me out on the streets, and neither should you. A nice compliment deserves a “Thanks!” but that doesn’t mean you have to stop what you’re doing.
*Bonus* When All Else Fails Play Crazy…And Gross
Bet a man won’t want to “get to know you better” if you pull out that wedgie in front of him. And maybe his whole dialogue will go down the drain pretty fast if you accidentally let out a burp as he talks about how fine you are and why he’d like to take your number. You can also dig in your nose or pretend you have Tourette’s until his side-eye turns into a complete back-step all the way back to where he came from. If all else fails just run…run far away.
I’m kidding with this last one by the way. The first three will do. Good luck, and Godspeed…