The Meanings Behind Your Hot And Heavy Dreams

July 2, 2013  |  
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If you’re waking up feeling dirty, sweaty, confused and maybe a little guilty, you just need to decode those sultry dreams that have been interrupting your slumber. (But is it really an interruption when it’s sort of fun?…)

The return of the ex

No, this doesn’t mean you’re supposed to get back with your ex so put down the phone. It simply means you have some feelings over the breakup that you still have to process. If you’re with someone new, it could be an indicator of some concerns you have about your current relationship. Pay attention to how you feel in the dream—it may be warning you that you’ve invited the same negative traits/dynamics that were in your last relationship, into your new one

Sex with a family member

These are always deeply disturbing and can leave you shaken up for a while. And, if these stem from any real life experiences, certainly pursue the professional help you feel you need. But if these are merely dreams, it doesn’t mean you’re hot for your cousin: incestuous dreams often have to do with transitioning into adulthood, becoming a parent, or wanting to heal a riff with a family member.

Same sex dreams

If you have no homosexual tendencies in real life, yet keep dreaming about having sex with someone of the same gender, this often has to do with self-esteem issues. The dream is telling you to accept parts of your body that you’ve otherwise been shy about or ashamed of.

Sex with a friend

Don’t jump to conclusions thinking you’re in love with your best friend just because they show up in a raunchy dream. We often have sex dreams about a friend who we are in a fight with, whom we are experiencing insecurities in the friendship with or whom we are jealous of.

Sex with a celebrity

Channing Tatum is a fine man, so no need to wonder why you’re having dirty dreams about him. The real question is why you’re dreaming of sleeping with a celebrity and the answer usually has to do with wanting more fame, more power, more money or a higher social status.

Sex with a stranger

Carl Jung believed that every woman has a male energy, called the animus, and every male has a female energy, called the anima. Our dreams about having sex with a stranger have to do with our acceptance of these energies. For example, many women struggle with their more masculine qualities like being dominant and assertive, and when this is the case they’ll dream of sleeping with a weak man of smaller stature. Once you begin to accept your animus, you may dream of sleeping with stronger men.


Forced sex

Similar to the incestuous dreams, if these stem from real life experiences you should seek professional help. But having dreams about rape, when you’ve experienced no such thing, is completely common. Often these dreams happen when there is somebody in your life who you believe is a threat to your wellbeing or your self-esteem—somebody who is forcing themselves onto you in some unhealthy manner.

Cheating dreams

Don’t freak out and think you want to cheat on your partner just because you do so in a dream. This usually is your subconscious’ way of working out your guilt over hurting your partner. Have you said something particularly cruel? Or failed him greatly in some way? A genuine apology for these acts might make these dreams go away.

Cheated dreams

These are just as bad as the dreams in which you’re doing the cheating. But don’t start stalking your man’s Facebook or spying on him because you dream about him cheating on you. But do evaluate the relationship, as these dreams often have to do with you feeling your partner isn’t giving you all the energy or attention you need.

Sex with a friend’s partner

Don’t worry: this doesn’t make you the home-wrecking type. You’d probably never actually sleep with your friend’s partner. Often you don’t even desire that person in real life, but you admire one particular quality in them, which you hope to find in your own mate. In the dream, you’re essentially making love to that quality, not that person.


Having a private part

Are you the man in your dreams? This could mean a number of things including confusion about your own sexuality, a struggle to release a surge of creativity, or trouble once again accepting your animus.

Having both a private part and a vagina

The dream itself might weird you out, but it could be a good sign! Having a dream about having both forms of genitalia could just be a sign that your male and female energies are completely in harmony with each other.


Sex with multiple people

If your current partner is in this dream, this doesn’t necessarily mean you think a threesome or is necessary for your relationship. It could however mean that you feel your partner is taking more risks than you are and is leading a more exciting life, and you feel the need to prove to him that you take risks too.

Voyeuristic dreams

Are you not an active character in your sex dreams at all but are in fact watching—closely, observantly—other people making love? If you know those people, you might in real life feel great envy of their relationship (if they’re in one together—romantically or platonically), or of each of them individually for different reasons. If you don’t know the people at all, honestly, you just might need to get laid!

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