A Leopard Can’t Change Its Spots–And Serial Cheaters Don’t ‘Just’ Stop Cheating

April 15, 2013  |  

A couple of weeks ago our associate editor, Veronica Wells, reported on the scandalous story involving Sesame Street actor Roscoe Orman, who played Mr. Gordon on the popular television program. According to reports, the 68-year-old actor left his partner of 40 years, Sharon Ormon, for a much younger woman by the name of Kimberley Lamarque, whom Sharon says he was carrying on an affair with. He married Lamarque not long after he left Sharon, who gave birth to four of his children. Here’s the kicker: He never married Sharon. To make matters worse, when Roscoe picked up and left her back in 2010, she was left dead broke and in danger of losing the home that the pair once shared to foreclosure. My heart really went out to Sharon. After investing four decades into their relationship and giving that man four children, she walked away with nothing more than what a jump-off walks away with after her man of choice decides that he’s through with her.

A few days later, I reported on a follow-up story. Roscoe’s jilted lover revealed that her ex’s new wife wasn’t the only woman he’d cheated on her with, expressing that he frequently stepped out during their relationship. She also dropped the bomb that Roscoe also had a child outside of their relationship. To make matters worse, she found out about Roscoe’s love child while she was pregnant. Yeah, she and the other woman were carrying his children at the same time. Upon hearing this, my well of sympathy for Ms. Sharon dried up a bit. Make that a lot. After all of that, why stay? When asked why she never left Roscoe despite his filthy, philandering ways, she responded:

“I wasn’t going to jump up and leave my family.”

And this brings me to my point. My vivid imagination took me to those sleepless nights where Sharon probably waited up for Roscoe to come home. I imagine her sad and disappointed face when the paternity suit papers arrived in the mail. I imagined her sitting at her kitchen table, agonizing over the details of the suit, wondering how the man that she thought she knew so well could hurt her in such a way. Then, my mind flashed to an image of her desperately holding onto the love that they once shared, telling herself that if she holds on, things just might get better. As you can see, they never did. In fact, after dogging her out all of these years, he got up and left.

While every situation is unique, most serial cheaters don’t just up and decide to stop cheating to do better, and in my opinion, simply waiting around for them to do so seems a bit foolish. I am not saying once a cheater, always a cheater, because I believe that people that really desire a change have the ability to do it. But, I am saying that if a woman simply rolls over and accepts her man’s cheating ways, why would he stop? He’s getting the best of both worlds. The Mashonda-Swizz-Beatz-Alicia Keys love triangle is another situation that comes to mind. Swizz allegedly cheating with Alicia was really only the final nail in the coffin of his marriage with Mashonda, but it certainly was not the first time he cheated on her, seeing as how he had a little girl outside of their relationship. She stuck around and what did he do? He dogged her out and eventually left her for what he considered to be a “better” prospect. A rather extreme example is the tumultuous relationship between Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta stars Stevie J and Mimi Faust. From the outside looking in, it appeared that MiMi stuck with Stevie despite his cheating (and impregnating) ways for so long that he eventually became bolder with it. And eventually, the fact that she knew he was cheating on her no longer mattered to him.

I understand that there’s probably a lot that went on behind close doors between all three of these couples that we as the public may never know about, but the point that I am trying to make is that tolerating infidelity (from both males and females), only seems to breed more cheating.

Have you ever been in a relationship with a serial cheater?

Follow Jazmine on Twitter @jazminedenise.

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