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We all look at our birthdays as an important time of the year. When that special day rolls around, most of us break out long lists of celebratory events, pressuring friends, associates and family members to go all-out to satisfy our egos. We want the big bashes, expensive gifts, retreats, and let’s not talk about the people who want to celebrate the entire weekend, week or month (can’t lie, I’ve been guilty of this in the past).

A lot of us get so caught up in partying and going the extra mile that we sometimes forget that all of that isn’t necessary to have a good time. Yeah, hanging out ‘til the wee hours of the morning can be entertaining, but you don’t have to get pissy drunk and fall out to enjoy yourself (plus, nobody likes to see or be around a woman incapable of holding her liquor. Not cute, boo). Not only can that be exhausting (especially if you’re, ahem, a little up in age), but it can be expensive too. You know how we women do. When it’s time to party, we like to go out and buy ourselves a whole new outfit. We have to get a brand new hairstyle, nails done up and feet pedicured so that they can shine in our expensive open-toe heels. And if you’re the type described in the opening paragraph, the kind who wants to celebrate your birthday every weekend of the month, then that stuff really adds up. Not only for you, but for everybody celebrating with you. And with taxes increasing and paychecks being cut short, ain’t nobody got time for that!

Sometimes it’s better to do away with the wild parties, club-hopping and bottle-popping and just chill. Relax a little. Why not do something simple from time to time? Finding a nice way to spend QT with your friends and family that doesn’t require loud music and much money can be the best way to enjoy your birthday. Indulge in a nice dinner with your boo and top it off with an even better dessert later in the night. Or if you have children, savor a home-cooked meal and watch late night flicks with the little ones until you fall asleep. Check out a funky museum, visit an art exhibit. Hey, why not spend some quality time with your mom? She is, after all, the reason you have a day to celebrate in the first place (and God knows she endured enough pain to at least get a “thank you.” Yes, mothers really should get more love on our birthdays).

If you don’t mind shelling out a little cash, do something cool that you’ve always wanted to do, like attending a play on Broadway or going on a cruise. Or treat yourself to a soothing day at the spa. Whatever it is, take a break from the usual “it’s-my-birthday-so-I’m-going-to-party-the-month-away-and-pressure-all-of-my-friends-and-family-to-break-their-necks-for-the-sake-of-my-happiness” b-day celebrations. Live, yes. Have fun, of course. But don’t be afraid to lay low from time to time and get your grown woman on.

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