Happy New Year! 14 Celebrity Predictions We Hope Will Happen In 2013

January 2, 2013  |  
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With 2012 winding to a close, what can we expect from some of our favorite celebrities, both of the successful and hotmess variety? Well if we knew that life would be a whole lot less fun, now wouldn’t it? But in the spirit of the  New Year, we feel it’s only right to weigh in with our predictions/deep-seeded hopes for the year to come. So without further adieu, we present Madame Noire’s celebrity predictions for 2013. Happy New Year!

Beyonce’s New Album Will Be Worth The Wait

This year was a huge one for Ms. Beyonce Knowles. Not only did she once again top the charts with an album (“4” was out of this world, ya’ll), but she also welcomed into the world the daughter of hip-hop royalty, Blue Ivy. But as proud as we are of Beyonce for 2012, we have our fingers crossed that 2013 will be even better, on multiple fronts, for the songstress. With rumblings of a new album in the works and a performance at the Super Bowl just a few weeks away, we can’t help but think that the new year could bring some serious success for one of music’s best-liked and most-talented artists. We’ve got our money on Beyonce holdin’ it down yet again as soon as the clock strikes midnight on NYE.

MTV Will Get The Hint And Ease Up With The Reality Shows

OK so maybe this one isn’t as much of a prediction as it is a really, really big hope. But we are really hoping that 2013 will be the year that MTV realizes that they’ve sank their claws into enough reality television for this lifetime and that they should get back to what they do best: music. Though they’ve got several “Jersey Shore” substitutes in the works, including “Washington Heights” and “Buckwild,” we have just got to say that we’ve had enough with this kind of uninspired television. MTV, ya’ll used to be amazing. We’d catch all our favorites debuting their new videos with Carson and Sway and company. Now, nothing but crappy television shows.

We know someone is thinking what about VH1?? Well, there’s no hope for them but we think MTV isn’t opposed to making their bread and butter elsewhere. Here’s to a 2013 upgrade.

Nicki Minaj Will Grow Up

This year we saw a lot Barbie going in on people — A lot of people, especially if your name was Mariah. Sure it was thoroughly entertaining, but don’t you think enough is enough Nicki Minaj? We get it. You’re angry, but it would be nice if you at least attempted to carry yourself in a way that doesn’t embarrass the entire rap community. You’ve got a personality that is sure to engage fans – or at least keep them talking about you — so it’s not like you need all this extra anger to push your music and further your hustle.

Rihanna and Chris Brown Finally Admit They’re Not Meant For Each Other

Not that we’re entirely convinced that this will happen – actually we’re not convinced at all that this will happen – but we can dare to dream, right? You’d be hard-pressed to find two people who are less compatible — or more toxic — for each other than these two and for both of their sakes, we hope they just cut their losses and move on.

Barack Obama Makes Us Proud

Four more years! Barack Obama did the damn thing during the 2012 election and staked his claim to the Oval Office for another four years. And we’re confident that in his first year back he will not only assert himself as the POTUS with the mostest, but also make huge strides in upgrading the economical health of the United States and following through on the promises that made him one of our favorite presidents. You’ve got the world at your fingertips, Mr. President, keep on making a difference — and look great doing it.

Lilo Gets It Together

Lindsay Lohan is the trainwreck to end all trainwrecks. The former child star turned absolute hotmess has been in and out of rehab, jail and courtrooms far and wide for way too long. While we’d like to be optimistic and think that she’d see the err in her ways and turn her life around, we’re just not buying that will happen when 2013 rolls in. Honestly, we’re more convinced that hell will freeze over faster than LiLo will get her life together. But for once, we’re actually hoping that we’re wrong.

A Pimp Named Slickback Gets His Kick Back

It may be too soon to expect this in early 2013, but we certainly hope the end of this year doesn’t end up like the end of 2012 for Katt Williams. The Cincinnati comedian is too talented — and hilarious — to have his legacy ruined by all of his antics over the past few months. He needs a new management team and some new friends to make him get his stuff together, and probably get off some stuff, so he can get back to telling jokes not being one.

Taylor Swift Will Be Angry … Again

Homegirl hides it well, but there is a lot of fury underneath those fun, little songs she comes up with. It seems like every few minutes this chick is coming up with new ways to stick it to her laundry list of exes. And don’t expect that to come to a screeching halt in the new year. In fact, we think that Taylor Swift is going to churn out a record number of man-hating tunes in 2013. We can only hope that she starts playing around with Russell Brand or some other exciting guys who might make for a little edgier sound.

The Celebrity Sex Tape Dies

There are so many celebrity lovers getting it in/engaging in questionable behavior out there that 2013 is bound to see CoCo Austin, Rihanna or maybe even Ms. Lohan take centerstage in a Vivid Entertainment-caliber production. Ochocinco already has his head buried in a nighttime flick disaster as we speak, let’s hope he’s at least one of the last.

Kim Kardashian And Kanye West Disappear

All signs point to a Kimye wedding being a real possibility come 2013. Anyone who has watched “Keepin’ Up With The Kardashians” knows this girl wants someone, anyone, anyone at all, to put a ring on it and we think Kanye West is just the man to do it. We’re sure Yeezy has a little boo envy when he takes a glance over at his boy Jay-Z, so what would stop him from marrying the reality television princess? Nothing at all. And that’s fine, we just don’t want that mess shoved down our throats. Unfortunately, it’s more likely that we’ll have to brace ourselves for yet another Kardashian wedding special in the new year. Here’s to this one lasting more than a few weeks.

Welcome Back, Jamie Foxx

It’s been a hot minute since Jamie Foxx has truly been relevant. But thanks to “Django Unchained”, this triple-threat is back on our radar and poised – for what we think – will be a big year for him. Not only will he star as President James Sawyer in “White House Down,” but next year could also see Foxx sharing the screen with Bruce Willis in the action flick “Kane & Lynch.” He’s been flying on the low for quite sometime and we’re not liking it. Jamie, baby, come back to us; give us a taste of your acting, music, comedic chops!

Big Year For Idris Elba, Too

Now we’ve always loved this hunk of manly hotness, but we have a funny feeling that when we see him in 2013’s “Pacific Rim” it’s going to be game over. The Benecio Del Toro sci-fi flick is one of the year’s most highly-anticipated movies and we can understand why. Not only is there going to be a lot of big-budget, visual awesomeness but we’re going to see a buff, wonderfully hot Idris Elba running around and doing all matters of alpha male, action movie stuff. Sounds like a win-win to us. Don’t even get us started on what will happen if news breaks that he’ll be the next James Bond.

Celebs Will Think Before They Tweet

We’re not asking much here. And here’s the thing, nobody ever has a perfectly crafted tweet that’s less than 140 characters. We know these hot-headed celebs are spending a lot of time abbreviating and rearranging words to meet Twitter’s character requirement, all we’re saying is while doing this, why not stop and think, “should I really say this to a fellow celebrity in front of my 15 million followers when I have the other person’s cell phone number and can just text them some ish in private?” See, that doesn’t take much thought does it?

Channing Tatum Will Become The World’s Hottest DILF

OK, yes we’re stating the obvious here. Channing Tatum is one of the most glorious specimens of humanity our generation has ever seen — and now he’s going to be a daddy. While on the one hand we’re ridiculously jealous that Jenna Dewan got the pleasure of creating a little Tatum-to-be, we also love the idea that on top of being wonderfully good-looking he will now have some daddy appeal. We like. We like very much.

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