Ask A Very Smart Brotha: I’m Engaged But I’ve Fallen In Love With Another Man

December 20, 2012  |  

Maggie: If you have a dream that your partner is cheating, does it mean he really is? Cuz imma cut his throat? Thanks

DY: Thanks for writing this. It explains why this woman I used to date would be staring at me while clutching a butter knife when we woke up in the morning. I thought she just wanted some waffles.


Rachel: After how much time dating should you discuss the future including Marriage and Babies with your significant other?

DY: 17.9% percent of the day? I don’t know, lol. What I do know though is that if you two are on the same page, you probably shouldn’t have to have that conversation all the time. If you find yourselves always bringing it up and disagreeing on certain aspects of it, then maybe it’s time to reevaluate things


Angel: Why do some men string women along dating, knowing their intentions are ill from the start (to drop her like a bad habit when its all said and done)? The dating doesn’t necessarily involve sexual contact either, in other cases it may.

DY: Because, 99.9% of the time, men who do this don’t actually know either. Many guys don’t enter new relationships with a “plan” other than “hmm. she’s cute.” And, when that happens—and, when they realize that she just aint the one for him—women get “dumped.”

It may seem intentional, like you were being strung along on purpose, but most times it’s really not.


Karmin: Is it ok to tell a man on the first date that you want to have like 5 babies with him?

DY: Sure. And by “sure” I mean “only if you get aroused by people taking out restraining orders on you”


Kat: When a woman has more drive than her man, is it wrong to hold him to higher standards, give him a timeline to set goals and get his act together and if not she moves on?…Is that too harsh?

DY: Not at all.


Leila: What are your thoughts about women being with older men 17 yrs older ?

DY: You like it, I love it.

That being said, it’s interesting how people’s opinions on the older man, younger woman thing depends on perspective. Basically, 30-something women attracted to and only interested in dating older men=cool. But, if a 30-something guy said that he was only interested in 21 and 22 year old women, he’s a lame.

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