The reigning champ of all things romantic. The bane of R. Kelly’s marriage. The Notebook has got to be one of the most sickeningly romantic stories to ever sprout out of the mind of Nicholas Sparks. And while every woman with a uterus and a heart absolutely melted at the 1940s love affair between Noah Calhoun and Allie Hamilton, every man has come away from the flick less than pleased by all the movie romance — except for one. And that man is R. Kelly who claimed in his 2012 memoir, “Soulacoaster: The Diary of Me,” that after he finished blubbering over the movie’s heart-wrenching final minutes, he realized that his marriage to dancer Andrea Kelly “had died.” Damn you, Ryan Gosling!