Does Father Know Best? Why You Should Consult Your Dad For The Best Love Advice
Men may seem like they don’t want to communicate, and that they definitely don’t want to communicate about relationships, but there is one guy that would be happy to chime in on your love life—your dad! Dads aren’t solicited enough for love advice, when they can be a wealth of knowledge. Here’s why:
He has no agenda
As opposed to a male friend or coworker, who may hope to sleep with you one day, or abide by some “male code” by not fully disclosing everything to you, your father has no agenda when explaining the mind of a man to you. Okay, he has one agenda: to make sure his little girl is happy. But is that so bad?
He understands the women in your family
Every family is unique and as the saying goes, “Craziness doesn’t run in the family—it gallops.” Whether you like it or not, you have a lot of the same insecurities, beliefs, values and issues as your mother does. And your father knows all about them and because of that, he probably knows a lot about you. He knows what makes the women in your family tick.
His testosterone levels are down
Your dad isn’t out there hustling anymore to be famous, or be the most successful man in his business, or be the hottest guy. He’s reached the age when testosterone levels drop, and that makes his head more clear than any hormone-raged man your age! Men past a certain age really know what’s important in life, and in a partner. Their vision is no longer clouded by the need to prove they are an alpha male.
He knows what makes wife material
Your dad knows what a man looks for when seeking a wife. He knows because he sought one out himself once! He probably has a clearer perspective than your mother does on what you’re doing to drive the good ones away, and attract them.
He’s already been every guy
He’s been the super selfish workaholic trying to climb the corporate ladder, he has been the finding-himself adventurer, unable to settle down, he’s been the player, he’s been the romantic. Your dad has already been all the characters that inevitably every man must be on his path to becoming a balanced, well-adjusted and knowledgeable individual. He can spot what phase a man your age is in from a mile away, and tell you if he’s in a phase that can handle a serious relationship.
He knows your standards
You may not realize it, but absolutely everything about the way you were raised affects the way you see, well, absolutely everything. Your father knows you wouldn’t be happy with a certain lifestyle, or with a man in a certain profession, or even in a certain socio-economic class. You’re his little girl, and he has you hardwired to demand certain standards. Instead of you sampling every wrong guy out there, and every lifestyle via different men, you could just have your dad tell you when it will and won’t work.
He knows what it means to sacrifice
Your dad has children. His life has not been about himself for a long time. He is the ultimate authority on what it means to sacrifice, what it means to plan every day with the needs and desires of other people in mind, and what it means to consider someone else’s wellbeing with every decision he makes. If anybody can spot out a guy that has learned to be a giver, it’s your dad.
He doesn’t buy any BS
Because he’s given it all himself. Your dad knows every single lie and excuse in the book. He’s years ahead of anyone you date on the art of sneaking one past a woman. While your mother may still not have figured out all the lies your father tells, your dad can see right through anything you tell him about a guy you’re seeing.
He doesn’t want you to settle
Your mom might push an agenda of dating a safe man, a successful man, a dad-material man. And while those things are important, your mom might be jaded by all of her memories of dating the “bad boys.” In other words, your mom is thinking, “Just please don’t date a dead beat.” But your dad is looking beyond that. That a guy you date can take care of you is a given—your dad wouldn’t give a guy the time of day if he couldn’t provide for you. And because his vision is so clear on that matter, he can pay attention to other things like: does the guy make you laugh? Make you smile? Give you cute surprises?
He’s looking for his replacement
Remember, all a father wants in a man for his little girl is somebody that will take his job and do it well. Nobody cares about your health, your happiness and your quality of life like your father does. If a man can meet your father’s standards, you’re set for life.
He can tell you in a way you’ll understand
Your dad has spent his whole life finding ways to explain things to you! He knows how to get you to listen, he knows what your best method of learning is, he knows how to put things in a way that you’ll want to digest. Your dad may not be fluent in the language of love, but he is fluent in the language of you.
He won’t sugar coat it
Family tells you like it is. Your dad isn’t going to skirt around it if you’re being an idiot with your love life. He isn’t going to find a nice way to tell you that clearly a guy is cheating on you. And that’s good, because sugar coating only makes you think things are less serious than they actually are. Your dad doesn’t want you to spend another second living a lie, or not being aware of the facts.
He had to impress your mom’s parents
You usually grow up to set the same standards for your children, as your parents did for you. In other words, the same things that impressed your mom’s mom will probably impress your mom. If you’re trying to get her to like your guy, just ask your dad how he impressed your grandparents. He is an expert in that area.
He doesn’t want the details
And neither should you. You may have a long, drawn out story detailing exactly why and how a man you’re dating is failing to make you happy. Women love those details, and often use them as an excuse to analyze things, and give the man another chance. Your dad doesn’t want the details. He only needs to know one thing: is his little girl happy? And he can see that answer in the first sentence of your ten-minute story about your unsatisfactory boyfriend. He can help you see it, too.