By Dr. Susan Heitler
If having an affair is the last thing you want to do, you better heed these six warnings signs. They indicate that you are heading down a slippery slope. One more step could be too late to prevent a disaster.
1. A call from an old friend. A phone call from an old flame? How risky! As one fellow explained to me, “When she contacted me via LinkedIn, there was a sense of titillation, and then she continued to reach out to me.”
The moral of the story: If you don’t want to catch fire, stay far from the sparks. They are fun and often prove too dangerous to be worth the mini-delights of minor sexual pleasures. The two highest risk categories for dangerous connections are old flames and current business associates, especially ones that you spend a lot of time with
2. A fragile relationship situation. When a relationship or marriage feels frustrating it can be all the more tempting to slide into connecting with someone who seems easily kind, easy to talk with or appreciative of you. Have you two communicated effectively about the blockages to smooth sailing with each other? If not, it’s time to start!
3. Hiding that you are already taken. If in the course of our talking with a lovely person of the opposite sex, you find yourself avoiding mention of the fact that you have a stead or are married, you are heavily already into the danger zone. Beware especially because as sexual feelings toward a new person grow, your recollections of how and why you chose that person as a mate will fade.
That’s because of the nature of old versus new sexual feelings and new potential sexual partners virtually always evoke more intense sexual feelings. That says nothing about how good a match they could be for you; it’s just a biochemical thing about how sexuality works. New trumps familiar — but for sex only. Intense sexual appeal only though does not a good match make.
Check out the other three signs on YourTango.com.
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