Trouble in a relationship most often can be boiled down to one word: infidelity. But it’s not just sexual infidelity you’ve got to be worried about. Your partner could also be cheating financially. It’s the problem that came up in Today.com and Self.com’s online survey.
More than 23,000 people responded to the survey, and about two-thirds revealed that they believe honesty is equally important in dealing with finances as it is in sexual relations. Still this realization isn’t enough to stop the lying. The survey discovered that 37 percent of men and 56 percent of women admit that they have lied to a partner about money.
Jillian Phillips tells MSNBC that she and her fiancé have always been open and honest about their financial situations. Within two months of their relationship, the two were discussing school loans, checking accounts and future plans. Currently they have a joint checking account for shared expenses. Even still, Phillips admits she does keep some money secrets.
“I feel guilty, for some reason, when I come home with a new pair of boots or a new bag,” she said to MSNBC. “I always say that I got it on sale even though that’s not true 98 percent of the time.” Women are about twice as likely as men to hide a purchase or a receipt from a partner. About one-fourth of women have even said something that was new was old or on sale.
But why do they do it? Most women respond that it’s their hard-earned money, and they deserve to spend it how they want, even if they have to hide it.
While financial cheating is not sexual cheating, that doesn’t mean it’s consequence free. “Those are the two domains where they do fundamentally function based on trust,” Scott Stanley, University of Denver research professor and co-author of “Fighting for Your Marriage,” said to MSNBC. “Those are the two domains where, once you’re really hooked on somebody in life, they can completely ruin you.”
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