Yesterday morning, I was on WorldStarHipHop watching all the craziness and depraved indifference to decency that only WSHH could offer when I came upon a video of Brian McKnight singing his forthcoming song.
According to McKnight, one day he was on Twitter – the place where all bad ideas come from – when he got a (bad) idea to do an “adult” mixtape. He asked Twitter what they wanted him to sing about and the responses mostly centered on the same stale ballads he’s been singing for most of his career. Not heeding to their advice, McKnight went out and stepped on a ledge – a rather long ledge – and wrote a new song called “If You’re Ready to Learn.” He was so excited about it that he wanted to share parts of it with the blogosphere. Hmm, sounds interesting. And so it was.
If you haven’t already seen the video through our site, the chorus went: “Let me show you how your p***y works / Betcha didn’t know that it could squirt / I have lots of things to show you / If you’re ready to learn.”
Oh Got-damn Brian McKnight! Are you that desperate for a comeback? He went from howling his way through songs like “One Last Cry” to crooning about female ejaculation squirts. But I can’t lie, the song arrangement is dope. As one of my Facebook friends said, it sounds like it should be a Lil’ Wayne song, and she’s exactly right. All the raunchiness of a hip-hop song but with a better melody. It’s a song that would even make Prince and R. Kelly blush. After getting over the initial “What the Hell Brian”-ness of the track, after a few more listens, I found myself swaying from side to side, humming the lyrics to the song all day at work. Damn you Brian McKnight with your sultry voice and catchy tune.
But not everyone was ready to learn what McKnight was doing in between those times when he was crying over tracks. According to Gawker, “…the feedback on Twitter and YouTube was too much for McKnight, who eventually removed the song while lamenting his diminished status in the music industry….In its place, McKnight posted the innocuous “Live Without You” (“okay back to the safe love songs” reads its description).”
After pulling the track, McKnight tweeted: “It’s just sad that this is what I have to do get most of these people to even acknowledge me.” Damn, that is kind of sad. I’m actually ready to string a real life violin for him – to the tune of “If You’re Ready to Learn,” of course.
But seriously, McKnight’s dismal attempt at a comeback aside, his little stunt has also revealed the fate of what happens to artists, who no longer have a place in the finicky music industry. Old school crooners like McKnight, who made careers swooning the ladies and giving men a perfect background music to express their sentiments of real love and affection, have been replaced with young R&B singers. Their entire schtick involves ripping off shirts, half-rapping, half-heavy breathing into microphones about tawdry tales of butt buddies and one-night stands. Yes, the love songs are missing in today’s musical landscape. Most might blame the music industry, but truly, they only give us what we want to hear/settle for.