Why Are We Still Mad At Them? Stars We Can’t Seem To Get Over

January 8, 2012  |  
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Often times, celebrities go through things and we take it totally personal.  Like, they could have moved on with their lives and found the full answer to world peace and we’d still be like, “But remember when…”  So, maybe there are some things we – hell, I – need to get over. It may not happen when you read this and shoot, it may not happen at all (I’m sure I’ll side eye some of these things always) but maybe we should just…get over it?

Check out some of these examples and see if we should get over it or stop being so to forgive since “it wasn’t me or mine.” Let me know what you think!

Alicia Keys & Swizz Beatz

Now let me just say from the jump that I’ve never been a big Alicia Keys fan aside from a couple of songs and Swizz usually gets on my nerves so when news of their messing around while he still was with Mashonda gave me nothing but more reason not to like them.  Never mind that this wasn’t the first time we’d heard about Swizz stepping out on Mashonda; this was Miss “Superwoman” he was cheating with so that made it worse. And then a baby?! At that point, most of “us” were fit to be tied. But they’re married now. The baby’s here. They’re traveling the world buying art and being all philanthropic – all the while, being hugged and loved up. So we should just smile with them…right?

The Many Faces of Lil Kim & Auntie Viv

I know this is quite the pill to swallow. These were two pretty women who seemingly fell to Hollywood pressures (in Kim’s case, she started hanging with – well, “monied” white people) that made them feel they had to go under that knife and make some serious changes. I’m not against getting a little tweak here and there but those two? *sigh* They literally altered their faces. While it is very unfortunate and quite frankly didn’t help their careers, this is what they look like now. Are we going to continue to talk about how tragic it is every time we see a picture or see them on television? There’s no going back now so we have to just take them as they are.

Celebrities adopting black babies

I get that it seemed to be the “new” thing to see white celebrities adopt black babies. Every time we turned around it seemed that yet another white celebrity was on the cover of one of the gossip rags with their new…accessory.  I understand and for a long time, I agreed with that thought. But let’s look at it this way: black children are all tied up into the system and they need families who will love them. So, not only should we be doing our part to get them out and show them love but so can white celebrities who have the means and the love to do just that.  My only hope is that they’re able to learn black history since they will not be raised around black people.  Other than that, we should be able to get over this thought process that only “we” should adopt our children.

 R. Kelly & the young girl

Back in the day, we loved “The R.” Then in 2002, a video was leaked that showed a man looking eerily similar to R having sex with what appeared to be a very young girl.  Multiple charges were filed against him and he was eventually found not guilty, not to mention the young girl said the sex was consensual; but, it took us much longer to let him off the hook. Granted, times have changed and we mostly dance to “Step in the Name of Love” but his case in particular makes me wonder if we’re too easy to forgive because we want it to be “okay” that we still like to support our fave stars even when they’re wrong.  I’ve often argued about my dislike of R but admittedly, I did listen to – and enjoy – his latest album. Ohhh the conflicts…

Dwyane Wade & Gabrielle Union

Okay, much like Alicia & Swizzy, there seems to have been some tomfoolery going on here.  But, there’s a chance that Gabby only started her relationship with Dwyane once he was separated from his now ex-wife, Siovaughn. They’ve been together about four years and seem quite in love.  They live together, she spends time with his children (whom he has full custody of), and although we haven’t seen her work in some time (she got booed up and stopped working), they’re likely very supportive of each other in their careers.  Listen, they’re even on the cover of this month’s ESSENCE. So why do we still have to have an attitude when we see them?  FULL DISCLOSURE: I’m not “over” this foolishness either and for ESSENCE to supposedly be a magazine that promotes positive and “ideal” images about women being in relationships, I cannot believe they would put these two on their cover.

Chris Brown domestic violence charges

In 2008, something was said or done and Chris Brown assaulted Rihanna in a way that was hard to look at (remember there were plenty of pics floating around).  It was utterly disgusting and everyone hated him except the stans who insisted that Rih must have said something to CAUSE this type of beatdown.  But here we are, almost four years later and Chris…well actually, I don’t know about Chris. On one hand, he’s getting more airplay, his albums are doing better in sales and he’s getting time on television shows.  But on the other hand, he lashes out to people on Twitter, he still seems to have an attitude with interviewers (and get over it little boy, they’ll be asking about the incident forever) and let us not forget the window he broke at GMA last year. But still, Rihanna has said she’s forgiven him so if the person who was abused has “gotten over it,” shouldn’t we?

The “old” Lauryn Hill

It is OVER. The Lauryn Hill we loved in Sister Act 2 and in The Fugees is gone. She’s not coming back. Stop looking for her when she goes on tour. Stop hoping and praying to the music gods that “this year at Rock the Bells she’ll be different and better.” It is not going to happen.  The Lauryn Hill you see now is the Lauryn we are going to be dealing with for quite some time, if not for the rest of our lives.  So my suggestion to you if you’re upset about this is stop going to shows hoping for the best but getting the worst. Stop searching the web after one of her shows in a different city than yours hoping they will have gotten better results than you got when she was in your city. What you will do is just watch the old movie and listen to her old album and remember what used to be. In this case, I can definitely say: GET OVER IT.


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