Fighting Fair: Is Your Friendship Worth Fighting For?

December 21, 2011  |  

What about the typical Bad Girls Club mentality of riding and dying for your friends regardless of the situation?  Fortunately at the Bad Girls Club, that “friend” could be the person you’ve known since the playpen or the roommate you’ve known for five minutes that you will end up hating in about two episodes.    Sometimes as women we believe it’s our duty to have the typical “Mean Girls” mentality of having a common enemy, meaning if my girls have issues with you, I do too.  But sometimes this pack mentality often ends up hurting your bond more than helping it.  If you were a “Basketball Wives” fan, you may remember Royce playing the peacemaker at one time between Susie and “Mean and Evil” mates Evelyn and Jen.  The situation ended up messy, and Royce ended up being the odd one out next season while it was Suzie’s turn to play nice.

You may have also witnessed Love and Hip Hop’s Chrissy in the process of burning some bridges with Yandy Smith, her long time companion’s Jim Jones manager after Yandy oversteps the boundaries of professional and  personal.  And let’s not forget the rivalry that’s just slowly cooling off between the clique and Somaya Reece, although Olivia still harbors resentment from past insults.  For every five minutes of solidarity, we see fifteen of conflict and competition.  It just makes me believe that as much as we talk about honor and loyalty, our behavior continues to be fickle and fairweather.

We all would like to know that while we’re watching our front, our bestie has our back.  Although reality TV gains ratings of depicting us women doing anything but that, hopefully our real life friendships are filled with more laughter than low blows and more hugs than haymakers.  In our effort to maintain respect we put ourselves in situations where we disrespect other women.  There’s this mentality where we can’t allow each other to all be great at the same time so we attempt to tear each other down with unnecessary verbal jabs and at our worse we’re throwing drinks and giving an audience a free show when words no longer accomplish the job.  Sometimes you just have to be the bigger person and let the drama go.  Friends that are truly worth fighting for will most likely never place you in situations where you’ll ever have to throw a punch.

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