“We don’t have any real problems. We’re pretty damn lucky this is our biggest problem.” My husband and I were laughing the other day when, we’d left for a road trip, and had our usual morning-of-the-road-trip-fight. It’s really ridiculous and hilarious. I have IBS, and when I feel rushed, it stresses me out, and makes my symptoms act up, which actually causes me to take even longer to leave the house. So my partner was upset I was in the bathroom so long, he wanted to leave, then I got mad because his anger was making my stomach problems worse, so then we left even later. Everybody got in the car angry, talking about how now we’d miss happy hour at this place and sunset at that place. Everybody felt it was everybody else’s fault. We spoke some choice words. We rode silently for 20 minutes. Then we burst out laughing, realizing this fight was ridiculous, and we were pretty fortunate that it’s about as bad as our fights get. But, there just are some things that can make the blood of even the chillest people boil. Even couples with healthy dynamics know you fight about these petty things.
When you’re in a serious relationship with someone, you are basically tied to their punctuality. You’re only as early as the earliest person in the couple. So if you are ready to leave on time, and then your partner causes you both to be late, it can cause a huge fight. You feel like he makes you look bad. You are the “late couple.” When one person runs late, it’s a reflection on you both.