How Many Kids is Too Many Kids to Have With a Man Before Marriage?

November 30, 2011  |  

So I found out some very interesting news today that I’m sure you might have heard yourself: Kourtney Kardashian is pregnant. Again.

It wasn’t long ago that the oldest Kardashian sister found out she was first pregnant with the now very adorable Mason (you saw that episode, right?). While her sisters were off running behind ballers, getting engaged and hitched quickly and getting divorced even faster, Kourtney was always somewhere in the corner–chill and content opening boutiques and being a good mommy. And now she’ll have double baby duty with her long-time boyfriend, the oh so incredible (NOT) Scott Disick. While I’m happy for her if she is happy, her situation has me thinking: how many kids should you be laying down and having with a man before he finally puts a ring on it?

Let me first say that I’m not trying to be a hater. In fact, I like Kourtney most out of all the girls in the clan. However, there comes a time when everyone has to get a little real. She just had her first child with Disick in 2009, and here we are at the end of 2011 with news that another little one will be on the way. This is the perfect time for Scott to wed the woman who has and will bring his children into the world, who has stood by him when everyone else in her family was trashing him (which he deserved most of the time), and stood by in general when he did many a shady and immature thing. Being a ride or die chick on paper is cool, but if after all that and two babies you all haven’t even had a serious conversation about marriage and where your future is headed, then that’s a problem. Well, at least to me it is.

I know that Kourtney shouldn’t rush into anything if she isn’t ready, and neither should Scott. I also know people say that a child shouldn’t be the reason people get married if they aren’t really prepared for that leap or truly down for one another. Yeah, I’ve heard that. But let me say then that a child isn’t something they should be bringing into the world again if they really don’t see a lasting relationship in their future. So bullcocky for that excuse. If she’s good enough to push out his babies, then Kourtney should be good enough to be a wife and want to be a wife as well.

There are way too many folks out here laying down with people they are not serious about, and a lot of the time the end results are multiple children by a man who they’ve dated for years, who one day decides that the life he’s living with you and your new family just isn’t working for him anymore. Sure, a man can pick up and start over with a new lady or live the bachelor life while seeing his children every week (if they’re lucky) since it’s always assumed that the kids will be the woman’s responsibility first. But of course, it will be harder for the woman to pick up and start over because she now has children that she has to raise, love, nurture and protect on the daily. Children are in no way some sort of negative baggage, but we all know that once they’re out, if things go bad, it’s very easy for the lady to end up being both mommy and daddy while the psuedo-father smooth sails through the club and bars on the regular. Trust, I’ve seen it.

As I stated before, I think we live in a society that’s a little bit too comfortable with having flings, having children and raising them around “maybe circumstances.” Maybe the relationship will work, maybe it won’t. Maybe we’ll get married, maybe we’ll break up. We’ll just see what happens. Maybe. WTF!? I guess I look at it like this: if you can’t be committed to after having a child with the man in your life, then you might want to at least STOP having more children with him. One child with Scott is one thing Kourtney, but TWO? AND he’s crazy? Now that’s another. If you’re already living together and sharing these responsibilities, these bills and a bed (obviously), then what’s the deal with the ring? Let’s work that out folks…

But what do you think?

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