What To Expect When A Good Friend Is In AA
When a friend tells you she’s an alcoholic, it can be hard to know what to say. My instinct, honestly, when my friend told me she was one, was to say, “No. You’re not. You don’t have a problem!” And that was not the right thing to say. It takes a lot for someone to reach a point of not only accepting that she’s an alcoholic but also telling other people. It’s not an easy thing to do. It takes a lot of humility. So if someone tells you she is one, she is. My friend was forgiving of my outburst, and calmly proceeded to tell me that she is in fact an alcoholic and has gone into the 12-step program, and will be attending regular meetings. She wasn’t quite sure how it would affect her friendships, but she knew that in some way, it would, so she needed to let everyone who mattered to her know. I’ve certainly made some mistakes in the friendship since then, but learned valuable lessons. Here’s what to prepare for if your good friend is in AA.
You won’t know when to invite her
You’ll at first be unsure when it’s appropriate to invite her to things. Should you invite her to your birthday, that is happening at a bar? Should you invite her to the tailgate that will be swimming in alcohol? Is it insensitive to invite her? Or hurtful if you don’t?