Signs Your Man Is Too Attached To His Boys

March 15, 2019  |  
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get your boy dawg

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I love that my boyfriend has friends. In fact, definitely be worried if any man you go out with doesn’t have a group of guys that he calls his boys. Maybe he doesn’t use that exact phrasing if he’s a little more buttoned up, but he definitely has his inner circle, his clique, or his crew, and they have been through a lot together. You have your clique, and think of how much they have made you who you are. They have got you through heartache, they have made you laugh, they’ve built memories with you, and they have given you much-needed advice on things like fighting with your mom or asking for a raise. Your boyfriend should definitely have a group of friends who have done this for him. But I’ve noticed some guys are a little too attached to their boys. Maybe it’s because they all once shared a house in college, or split a tiny apartment after college. Either way, you’d think they were attached at the hip or suckled on the same teet of the same mama, because they have mini meltdowns if they go three hours without talking. Here are signs your man is a little too attached to his boys.


He invites them to date night

You both work so hard to put aside one night that you are both free this month. You are very busy, and having a night when you can let loose and spend time together is important. But your partner doesn’t really see the importance of alone time with you, and always invites his boys to what was meant to be date night, without even consulting you first.


He can’t travel without them

Lord forbid you would have a romantic getaway with your guy. He always wants to invite the boys. If you say no, he starts negotiating, asking if they can come for just half of the trip. He says, what if they stay in a different hotel? But you know he is just going to go over to their hotel the second he wakes up and this will become a guys ‘weekend.


He texts them right after sex

There is no natural wind down from intercourse here. He has got to know what the boys have been texting about on the thread since he put his phone down 15 minutes ago to be intimate with you. He is texting them while you are still looking for your underwear.


They know literally everything

When you see his boys, they will reference the most personal, and minute details of your life with your partner. You can’t believe he told them you’ve switched to using vegan lubricant, for example, but he has.


You celebrate the holidays with them

You may not spend actual Christmas Eve with them, but your boyfriend insists there is a holiday event with the boys, complete with presents, eggnog, and all the usual festivities. Even though this time of year is already very busy for you, you have to add this to your events calendar.


He wants one to move it

When word gets out that one of his boys is breaking up with a girlfriend, and needs a new place to live, your man is on the task of convincing you to let that friend live in your guestroom. He asks you for this with the same excitement a child asks to host a slumber party.


They are planning their retirement

Him and his boys have an elaborate plan to eventually move all of them, plus their significant others, to a compound in a mountain or desert town. They have already drawn the blueprints for the property.


He competes with their wives

When your man finds out that one of his boys is going on a romantic trip with his wife for, let’s say, his birthday, your man feels slighted. He feels he had just as much claim over how his boy spent his birthday as that friend’s wife. If not more.


They participate in large decisions together

If one of your man’s boys announces that he and his wife want to buy a house, all the boys start pitching in on this decision. They get on a group email, sending housing listings, and discussing how the exact property and location would affect the friendship.


They have a group fund

Your man and his boys invest money together in a fund. Maybe it is for a business they want to start, or a vacation they want to take. But in addition to his investments with you, he has investments with his boys.


He calls them on speakerphone during date night

If you tell your man a story that he thinks the boys would like, he picks up his phone, and group calls them on speakerphone, to tell them what just happened. He essentially conferences them into date night.


If one moves it’s a huge deal

If one of his boys says he is moving even just 20 minutes further away, this sends your man into a genuine depression for weeks.


He pushes friendship between the significant others

All of the boys are constantly scheming to make their respective significant others be best friends with each other. They will buy tickets or spa packages for all of you that you did not ask for, doing anything to force the same kind of bond between you and the other wives or girlfriends that the boys have.


He drops other responsibilities for them

Sometimes, he just can’t help himself, and he has to meet the boys for drinks right before your work party, or your parent’s dinner party. If the boys are nearby he has to join them. Of course, he shows up to your parents house late and a little drunk.


They buy all the same things

They buy the same clothes, the same cars, the same groceries, and the same insurance plans. They are nearly identical consumers.

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