Signs Alcohol And Dating Don’t Mix For You
Having one or two drinks on a first date can loosen you up, help you feel less self-conscious, and let you shake off the concerns and worries from the day so you can be present. Cocktails are a favorite relaxing tool-of-choice for many active daters. But, we all know someone who drinks too much when they date. Or, perhaps someone who shouldn’t drink at all when they date. When they’re just with friends, some of their drunken tendencies are fun, cute, and endearing. But when they’re out on dates, under that intense pressure of is this my soul mate, and facing the awful prospect of another failed date, their drunken tendencies come out in all the wrong ways. Sometimes, alcohol is the one thing holding you back from a good dating experience. Here are signs that alcohol and dating don’t mix for you.
You have, unfortunately, had more than a few hookups that left you wanting to throw up and take 12 consecutive showers. How could you crawl into bed with someone one night whom, in the morning, makes you want to crawl out of your skin?
Something about the excitement of a spark, plus alcohol, always leaves you dropping $200 on date night. You want to order the most expensive bottle of champagne, several desserts, and leave your car with the valet to take a $50 Uber home. You literally cannot afford to keep drinking when you date.
Everybody wants to connect with someone. Sometimes, when you drink, you lose the patience to wait to get to know someone before really connecting. So you just blabber every deeply dark secret you’ve ever had. Then you’re both uncomfortable.
Another thing you may do when drunk and wanting to connect is pry too much. You go beyond the normal, helpful first date questions. You ask your date a very personal question, he’s clearly uncomfortable, he declines to answer, and then you force him to answer. You start calling him a “scaredy cat” or a “little b*tch” for not talking about it.
If you cry on first dates after drinking alcohol, you probably shouldn’t drink and date. Very few first dates that involve crying result in second dates.
Sometimes, you won’t get along with a date and may even argue. But most individuals on a first date should be able to behave themselves well enough to not get into a yelling match with someone they just met. If you can’t refrain from that, then perhaps stay sober on dates.
Have you started dates with one man and ended them with another? Maybe you wound up making out with the bartender, while your date was still there. Hmm. Maybe it’s not the alcohol but…it probably was, right?
A 180-turn in feelings
On the night of the date, you feel that there is a real connection. You feel a deep, undeniable closeness to this person. You feel in sync. You feel that you understand each other. The next day, when you’re sober, you couldn’t start that spark if you threw a box of flaming matches at a puddle of gasoline. It was all the alcohol making you feel a spark.
Agreeing to major plans
You wake up the day after dates and realize you’ve agreed to go away with that date for the weekend. Or to go to his parents’ cabin in two months. You already booked your ticket. Gulp.
You find that, after a few drinks, you’d like to swap stories about your exes. You don’t just give one or two little details. You wind up trying to get your date to come up with a plan, with you, to get back at your ex.
You’ve been asked to be quiet
You’ve been asked on more than one occasion to be quiet. The staff asked you. Customers at another table asked you. Your date asked you. You just don’t know your own volume when you’re drinking.
Everything changes in daylight
You thought he had a cute accent when you were drunk and now you realize you can’t stand the way he speaks. You thought he was hilarious when you were drunk and now you think he is creepy.
Destructive bad-post-date behavior
After a bad drunk date, you spend $500 on online shopping. Or you get a tattoo. Or you sign up for seven dating apps and send out way too many strange direct messages.
Destructive good-post-date behavior
After a good drunk date, you wind up messaging your date telling him that you think he’s your soul mate or that you’re going to name your new dog after him.
Your dates ask you to slow down
Your dates have, on more than one occasion, suggested that you’ve had too much to drink. Some dates have declined a second date, suggesting you find an AA meeting instead.