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Most breakups don’t happen suddenly. Small arguments will progress into large ones, and needing “space” can evolve into an entire relationship gap. Those who are in tune to the health of a relationship may suspect there are ripples of separation before the dreaded I need to talk conversation comes up. Other people, who may not be emotionally tapped in, could feel taken a back by their partner’s desire to split.

If you are starting to get the sense that your relationship is on the rocks, these signs listed below could be an indicator that a breakup is on the horizon. With these tips, you could get proactive about preventing separation if you want to keep the relationship. Start asking your partner about their needs and desires and what you can do to support them. If you aren’t looking to repair the connection, these signs may help you confirm it’s time to pull the plug.

1. You No Longer Plan Things Together 

Planning things in the present and the future is key for building a strong relationship. If the plans cease, the relationship probably doesn’t have a future.

“The more plans a person makes that intentionally do not involve their partner, the stronger the indication that they see themselves as someone individual — not as part of a couple,” licensed therapist Kryss Shane, BS, MS, MSW, LSW, LMSW, told Bustle.


2. You Argue All The Time

Healthy disagreements are important in any bond, but if it’s a constant, that may be a red flag.

“Arguments are OK, but arguments that repeat themselves, that happen over and over with no resolution, become a toxic drain on the relationship,” Joshua Klapow, PhD, clinical psychologist and host of The Kurre and Klapow Show, told Bustle. 


3. They Are Happier With Others

You ever notice your partner giving someone positive energy and then you get dust? That could be a sign it’s time to move on.

“You might notice that they are happy with them, and not with you,” Dr. Klapow says. “They move from emotionally connected to you, to emotionally neutral with you.”


4. They Avoid Being Around You

Are they skipping out on dates and commitments with you? Definitely a red flag.

“Prior to a breakup, couples may begin to avoid one another as much as possible,” relationship expert and spiritual counselor Davida Rappaport, told Bustle.

5. They Are Little Too Nice

What can be worse than arguing too much? Not arguing at all. If your partner avoids any confrontation with you, it could be because they are already checked out of the connection.


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