Can You Do These Things If You’re In A Relationship?

May 24, 2018  |  
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There are a lot of behaviors and activities that aren’t “technically” cheating. But what I’ve found is that the couples who get caught up on technicalities and push their activities to the limits within what isn’t “technically” cheating, well, they usually just wind up cheating. Or, at the very least, they’re always fighting. Whether or not someone actually sleeps with (or does anything physical) with someone else has no effect on the way some behaviors just make you feel betrayed. You know when your partner has your back and is undyingly loyal, and when your partner looks for loopholes in the system that let him stray without actually straying. Don’t get caught up on technicalities; go with your gut. On that note, can you do these things when you’re in a relationship?

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Block them from dating someone else

So your friend of the opposite sex is considering going out with somebody else, and you talk him out of it. Is it okay? Well, it depends on your motives. If you just genuinely don’t think that person is good for him, that’s one thing. If you’re keeping him single so you can have his attention and even save him for yourself, that’s another…

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Send a cute selfie

Sometimes you just want to send a friend a photo to get his or her opinion on your outfit or to make him or her laugh with your funny caption. The question is, would you mind your partner finding that photo in that text? Or, are you so blatantly hot in it with just the right provocative angles that it would raise suspicion?

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Tell them things you don’t tell a partner

Ideally, you should be able to tell your partner anything! Of course, that’s not always the case. And it’s okay to confide in a friend of the opposite sex sometimes…unless you’re confiding that you’re unhappy in your relationship, and this friend likes you.

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Saying Hi to your ex occasionally

You’re allowed to remain friends with an ex, but you and your partner should have an open dialogue about that friendship. And, as for conversations you have with that ex, if you wouldn’t want your partner to see those, they probably aren’t appropriate.

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Complain to other men about your partner

Honestly, it’s never really great to confide to people who aren’t your close friends and confidantes about your relationship. It’s disrespectful of the relationship. And, if you do complain to random men at bars and parties, they’ll probably think you’re looking to cheat.

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Give out your number

So long as it is very, very clear what the purpose is for you giving out this number, and that that purpose is platonic. Maybe this is a possible work connection, for example. But never give out your number without prefacing that you are romantically taken, and that this is about something else.

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Hang one-on-one with the opposite sex

Of course, you can hang out with your good friends of the opposite sex. What isn’t okay is hiding these interactions from your partner, or spending more time with this friend than your partner…then something is clearly off.

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Conceal that you’re in a relationship

There’s no good reason to conceal that you’re in a relationship. Even if, say, you’re out with three single friends and the four of you meet a group of four men. You don’t need to pretend to be single to keep the chemistry alive for the group. If you do that you’re putting the happiness of strangers over your loyalty to your partner.

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Direct messaging with the opposite sex

Can you slide into someone’s DMs on social media if you’re in a relationship? That depends on the nature of those conversations. If there are a lot of winky face emojis and compliments that you wouldn’t want your partner to see, then you probably know the answer.

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Fanning out on someone’s social media

Sometimes you’re just a huge fan of someone’s work on social media. Maybe this person makes funny videos or writes thought-provoking articles. Following them and hitting “Like” is fine, but developing an obsession with the person and comparing your partner to them is another thing.

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Share stories of your past sexcapades

It’s generally best not to tell friends of the opposite sex graphic, detailed stories about your sex life prior to your current partner. When you talk about sex outside your relationship, you give the idea that you’re still looking for it.

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Run to an ex (who is now a friend) during a fight

Even though your ex may be one of your closest friends, try to find someone else to run to when you’re fighting with your partner. Unless you want to start an even bigger fight.

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Keep your dating profiles active

Can you do these things when you’re in a relationship?If you’ve only been dating someone for a couple of months, it’s understandable that you wouldn’t yet delete those profiles that you spent so much time on. But keeping them up a year into a relationship doesn’t show much faith on your end in the relationship.

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Accept pseudo setups

You know that your mom or your mom’s friend wants you to meet so-and-so as a romantic setup. But, if they aren’t explicitly stating it, is it wrong to go to this “innocent coffee date?” If you know the intention isn’t innocent then, well, no.

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Receive flirtation

Sometimes, even if you aren’t doing the flirting, you need to lay down the law with others who are. Look, if your partner found a very flirtatious message from another man and saw that you didn’t tell the man to stop, how do you think he’d feel?

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