Worst First Date Dilemmas Women Face
If you’re single, you do your best to vet your dates, take time to filter out the most problematic direct messangers, and do your research. You try to set yourself up for the most pleasant date experience possible. You know that explosive chemistry won’t be possible every time, but you’re not asking for that—you’re just hoping for a night without an incident that will require you to call the police or write an Op Ed piece about. So long as your date doesn’t fright, insult, or disgust you, you can be satisfied with the experience. You don’t expect to be rewarded for putting yourself out there every time but, for goodness sake, should you have to be punished? No. Certainly not. But, sometimes, it can feel that way when you just get very unlucky. Here are the worst first date dilemmas that many women have experienced.
You’ve dated his friend
You get to talking about your friend groups, how you know them, who works where and is from where and you connect the dots…You’ve dated this guy’s friend. And, it wasn’t a good experience so who knows what that man has been saying about you (to your current date).
You like someone at the other table
Sometimes you just hit it off better with someone at the table next to yours. Perhaps if your date hadn’t been so late, or hadn’t taken that work call outside for 15 minutes, you wouldn’t have had the chance to hit it off with your neighbor. But, you did.
He mentions a deal breaker
Sometimes your date just mentions that one thing that, for you, is a total deal breaker. It’s awkward because perhaps it isn’t an obvious deal breaker, so he never could have possibly known he was ruining everything by telling you this.
Varying political views
This is its very own beast of a deal breaker. And for many, it is definitely a deal breaker. But more than a deal breaker, it’s the source for an argument right there and then on your date.
It’s uncomfortably expensive
Sometimes a man spends so much money on a first date that it’s just…uncomfortable. It’s inappropriate. You’re almost insulted because it feels like he must be expecting something by spending this much money.
Your parents know each other
Here’s another terrible way to connect the dots: when you realize that your parents know each other! It has a way of making you both feel a little sick to your stomachs.
You know instantly you’re a rebound
You learn that your date just broke up with a girlfriend of four years WITH WHOM HE LIVED…last week. Soooo basically, this is a rebound that has no potential to go anywhere.
You could network each other
You get to chatting and realize that you each have something the other one wants…professionally. But if you make this a work meeting then there is no going back.
You know of/hate his work
You learn of his work—perhaps a documentary he made, a product he invented, some artwork—and realize you hate this person. I mean, you don’t really know him, but you really don’t like what he stands for in his work.
You didn’t think this was a date
Sometimes you just didn’t realize this was a date. You go in there, wearing loose jeans and the same bun you had your hair in when you went to bed last night. And he’s there with flowers and damn this place is dimly lit.
Your date was plastered before you got there
One never knows quite what to do when one arrives at her date to find that her date is totally plastered. He clearly won’t even remember this date. But if you tell him he’s too drunk, he’ll just get defensive.
Running into someone else you recently dated
Popular date spots are popular for a reason. So while you may have chosen a date spot different than the last place you went on a first date, your last date might also know about this new spot. And there he is.
Seeing an ex’s friend
When your ex’s friend is at the same establishment, it just puts you on edge. You spend the whole date insecure, feeling that your ex’s friend is judging you and planning to report back to your ex.
So short you just can’t
You set your height as an inch shorter than you are. Your date set his height as two inches taller than he is. And there you are, with his eyes meeting your breasts and you’re sorry but you can’t do this.
The unwanted second date
You’d think that if two people clearly don’t hit it off, that they’d both feel it. But, apparently not. We’ve all ended a date that we thought was obviously terrible, only to have our date ask when we could go out again…!