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Tamera Mowry-Housley has already addressed viewer criticisms of her sharing too much about her husband Adam on “The Real.” Essentially, people think she talks about her man too much. One fan, who was following The Real on Instagram went out of her way to express this sentiment. And while she didn’t @ mention Tamera in the comment, she certainly received a response.

(Be sure to click through to see the full exchange.)

When I posted the video on my Instagram page, I was more focused on Tamera’s response. The demonic spirit line was hilarious to me. I mean, I was screaming laughing. Because truly, at the end of the day instead of sitting on your couch being annoyed with Tamera talking about her man, just stop watching the show. Then to bring up some old Tamar mess, what is the end goal, sis?

But when I posted the video, I noticed that a couple of people agreed that Tamera did talk about her husband too much. Interestingly enough both of these women are married.

And it made me think where is the limit? When do you know you’re talking about your husband too much?

Now, before we go any further, I’m not talking about the women who spark up a conversation just to let you know they’re married. The type of women who pronounce husband as huzzzband without an ounce of humor. The women who will take a conversation about nuclear fission and turn it into a way to discuss the virtues of their relationship. Not those women.

For as long as I’ve been around and as long as I’ve been hearing married women talk (all my life), I’ve noticed that they tend to mention their husbands at least once or twice in a conversation, even one that lasts under 10 minutes. Who knows how many times he’ll come up if you talk for hours. And this is not limited to women in happy marriages. Women who can’t stand their husbands still find a way to bring that negro into the discussion. Personally, I never saw a problem with it. If the topic called for an example or evoked some type of memory of their husband, then it’s fair game in a conversation. Naturally and even mathematically, it just makes sense that your husband, the man you live with and hopefully love and learn from, would come to mind, often.

I just think, most married women or women in relationships aren’t going around recording their conversations like Tamera is being recorded, so they don’t realize how much they reference something their husband said or did.

But one of the married women said that she goes out of her way not to mention her husband because she knows how annoying it can sound to other people.

First, that’s not been my experience with this woman. I’ve heard about her husband quite a bit. It never struck me as overkill or annoying. Her stories about their relationship and their conversations were interesting and charming to me. But I was intrigued by the thought that sharing the details of her life with a man would be annoying to some people.

Like most human reactions, I would argue that it’s just not personal. Again, I must remind you I’m not talking about the women whose entire identity is wrapped up in being a Mrs. I think if someone is annoyed by you mentioning your husband once or twice in a conversation—especially when it is applicable— then that person has their own internal struggles to work through. And honestly, whether you talk about your husband or not, they’ll still be grappling with that.

But the whole thing really makes me wonder when do you know when you’re talking about your husband too much? And do you censor yourself and your conversation for fear of annoying other people with the details of your relationship?

 

Veronica Wells is the culture editor at MadameNoire.com. She is also the author of “Bettah Days” and the creator of the website NoSugarNoCreamMag. You can follow her on Facebook and on Instagram and Twitter @VDubShrug.
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