Getting over being cheated on is no small task. Some people never do get over infidelity—it’s the ultimate breach of trust. When someone cheats on you, it can feel like they broke something you had together beyond repair. Of course, couples can stay together after infidelity, and many do. But it takes a lot of work—both individually and together in therapy (and of course at home). Simply saying, “I forgive you” will not get you back to feeling close, trusting, loving, and happy again. Getting through and past infidelity is very difficult. In fact, if you won’t acknowledge what a tremendous task it is, you may not be able to accomplish it. Too many couples just try to get back to the way things were, without doing the work, and that’s a recipe for disaster. If you haven’t done the work, here are signs you haven’t forgiven your cheater.
You’re cold to his female friends
You aren’t friendly towards his female friends, coworkers, or acquaintances. Even if you’ve known them since before the cheating, you now associate them with an issue and a hazard.