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We’ve all found ourselves in one-sided friendships. Those of us who, in particular, are good listeners, generous with our time, and very empathetic get stuck in a lot of one-sided friendships. People who can be a bit self-involved are drawn to people like us. And, at first, it feels flattering—they’ll tell us how sweet we are, how caring we are, what amazing people we are, and how much we bring to their lives…It’s so flattering that we are distracted from the fact that this person brings nothing to our lives. It’s great if someone appreciates that I’m a good listener and a generous person, but I don’t want them abusing those qualities, which happens a lot. I can’t play the victim entirely, though: I need to learn to recognize these friendships as they’re developing. As for those of you who are already involved, here is how to get out of a one-sided friendship.

No Love On Tinder

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Extend your response time

You don’t have to respond to every text right away. That’s how you train this person to reach out to you every time they want to vent, or want someone to accompany them to something that just isn’t fun. You’re free to take a few hours to respond, at which point, they will have already vented to someone else or roped someone else into their activity. Show that you cannot be relied on.

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