Source: Shutterstock

From StyleBlazer

As a woman, what are the things you worry about the most? A new study found that British women worry about their weight more than their finances, personal relationships, or their overall health. Although children and family came in first, weight came in second. Does this have anything to do with pressure from society to be a certain size, or are we putting pressure on ourselves to look good?

Check out the other concerns that made the list:

1. Children and family: 84%
2. Weight: 67%
3. Money: 64%
4. Relationships: 52%
5. Health: 43%

Get more details on the other findings on StyleBlazer.com.

Source: Shutterstock

From YourTango

By Christie Mims

You are sitting at your desk, buried under work, and you are exhausted.  So you reach for a can of soda, or a leftover cupcake from the company lunch, and eat it mindlessly as you click through your email.

As you get dressed the next day, you zip up your pants and think to yourself “Oh nooooo…my job is making me fat!”

Sure, you can argue about long work hours, loads of stress, no time to finish your New Year’s Resolution to lose weight (remember that?).  You can easily just blame your job.

We’ve all been there, trying to finish up a project before the next meeting and eating whatever is leftover in the break room for lunch.  Or coming home exhausted and surviving on a diet of caffeine instead of sleep.  You aren’t alone in feeling like your job is (literally!) a weight around your neck.

But the truth is that your job has nothing to do with it.

Your job isn’t grabbing a cupcake and shoving it in your mouth (for a long time, I was convinced my job was purposely buying cake…you know, just to mess with me!), it isn’t skipping workouts and making you chose a burger over a salad at lunch.

YOU ARE.

Read more on YourTango.com.

If you needed another reason to be a fan of Gabourey Sidibe, the words she spoke at a recent Women’s Inspiration and Enterprise conference in NYC last week just might give you what you’re looking for. The actress, who receives a lot of rude remarks and inquiries about her weight, touched on people’s obsession with her size, and the struggle she dealt with to feel confident about who she was as a young woman. And she also touched on how even with the confidence she gained, she still gets her feelings hurt by how cruel Hollywood and the media can be. According to fanshare.com, Sidibe had this to say about how finally loving herself actually helped her take on the role of Precious:

“I didn’t really get to grow up hearing that I was beautiful a lot, or that I was worth anything nor did I grow up seeing myself on TV. Then at some point when I was 21 or 22 I just decided that life wasn’t worth living if I wasn’t happy with myself so I just took all the steps that I could to figure out how to love myself and become confident. Truthfully speaking if I hadn’t found this person before that movie [Precious] I wouldn’t have even be in that movie.”

But it doesn’t help when magazines and sites try to make a mockery of her and her size:

“People see me as a confident person but I get shaken a lot, especially being in this business. A few weeks ago I was on vacation and I went into a CVS [a pharmacy chain of shops in the US] and as I’m paying I see a picture of myself on the cover of a magazine and they’re guesstimating what my weight is? The headline was ‘Gabourey Sidibe 250 pounds.”

But even with scenarios like that occurring constantly, Gabby tries to keep her head up in the midst of the media’s bull***, saying, “I have to keep going and living my life, so when things like that upset me I have to find things that build my confidence back up.”

I respect Gabby’s honesty, and I know it has to be a constant struggle for her with more time spent focused on her body type than on her talents these days. And while you might not agree with her size or her confidence, it would be nice if folks let her live and lead her life the way she sees fit. Clearly she’s aware of her size, and she’s decided to embrace it.

What are your thoughts on Gabby’s comments?

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inamerica.blogs.cnn.com

I’d been hesitant to tell my friends. I’d cajoled myself into doing so as a means of accountability that doubled as a warning for those who may see me in six months and say, “I thought she lost the weight. What happened?”
Starting a new weight loss program is exciting for many people, I’m sure. But there was a part of me that wanted to offer a rebuttal at the hint of a positive remark about my changing body, at any comment that I deemed overly congratulatory: “Just don’t judge me if I gain the weight back.” That phrase covered me, I thought, if I failed to keep the weight off. Because I’d already accepted that I probably wouldn’t be able to keep it off.

I know. There are many things wrong with that thinking.

There’s a picture of Jordin Sparks’ Shape Magazine cover saved on my computer desktop. “One day, you’ll flaunt it like this,” I said when I started to shed the pounds. I imagined myself behind an Instagram filter infiltrating folks’ social media timelines, completely aloof and wearing a two-piece bathing suit. Probably jumping off a trampoline or something. Flexing something fierce mid-air all Gabby Douglas-like. And then, because I was too embarrassed to say it aloud, I thought this: No, you can’t flaunt it. Because once you gain the weight back, you’ll be ashamed of what you used to be.

I figured it would be better to keep the body-flaunting at a minimum. Better to let old high school friends serendipitously spot me at the grocery store than in a comb-through of my Facebook timeline, a visual reminder of my ups-and-downs and then up-agains.

Again, so many things wrong with that thinking.

Who accomplishes anything with the belief that it won’t work out? Why get in the game if I thought that I’d somehow regress to where I started? Weight, you see, was the one thing I’d internalized as the thing I couldn’t get right. But now that I’ve started to get right and stay right, now that I’m understanding that managing my weight doesn’t have to be a permanent struggle, I’ve had to recalibrate my internal voice.

I wondered if other people who’d struggled with weight also had to grapple with the fact that self-confidence and self-belief doesn’t automatically come with each stride on the treadmill. It is, at once, a separate and entangled journey to lose weight, love yourself, and trust yourself at the same damn time.

I found an article about phantom fat and how some dieters are “waiting for the other shoe to drop… People who’ve gained and lost and gained again may be less likely to embrace a new image that they worry won’t last.”

And then I read what one of the quoted experts said: “We become numb to how mean we’re being to ourselves.”

Yikes. I realized that this doubtful voice could have belonged to an unsupportive phantom friend. One who lived with me every minute of the day and whose voice taunted me the second I’d get excited about my physical future. The thing is, I long would have banished this homegirl for her negativity, however, I spoke to myself with her voice and I didn’t recognize it. It just was. As much as I exercised, I knew that this voice would need to be exorcised too.

The “love yourself” rhetoric was cute and all, but I needed to know what loving myself looked like in action, in deed, and in conversation.

Marianne Williamson’s oft-recited “Our Deepest Fear” was once taped to my bathroom mirror, office wall and refrigerator. Meant to carry me through professional and spiritual journeys, I reread it as I decided that shift my perspective on weight watching.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?

After reading it, I rewrote it. Out loud.

Who am I to be gorgeous, desirable, and hot? Who am I not to be? Why am I not all of these things right now? My insides are pretty dope too, my personality, my smarts. Those things never yo-yo.

Tell me I’m slimming down and all I’ll say is thank you. Ask me what my workout routine is or how I’m eating and I won’t deflect. If I’m up a pound after a rough week, I won’t resign my entire svelte strategy to complete failure.

This new conversation, I think, is the beginning of confidence, the signs of self-belief. They don’t come on a treadmill, but in the things you tell yourself. The physical is fleeting, and even greater than the privilege of wearing a bathing suit, we all deserve a sense of wholeness, one that we prescribe to ourselves and for only ourselves.

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I was having a conversation with my boyfriend last night, and in the midst of trying to take out the garbage, put tape over the mysterious hole that popped up on my blow-up mattress (it didn’t help), and holding the phone at my ear at the same time, he told me a very interesting story that we both thought would be good to share for debate. It went something like this:

While having a conversation at work with his colleague, said colleague told my boyfriend that while watching Olympic coverage of women’s beach volleyball with his girlfriend, he became impressed with the frames of the ladies playing. They were bikini clad, sweaty, and in his eyes, HOT. In a moment of admiration, while sitting next to his lady mind you, he said, “Those girls look shapely.” For the most part, these stout yet lean athletes trounce around in a bikini where the most coverage they get clothing wise comes in the form of the sunglasses they put on to avoid getting sand in their eyes. Even when they play covered up, everything is as tight as tight can be. They have strong thighs, abs, and for a man, they’re women jumping around and up and down on TV–can you say jackpot???

Well, it was for homeboy, but not for his girlfriend. Instead of shrugging his comment off or agreeing with him, she took it as a slight on her appearance, an appearance that included a waistline, which had allegedly increased over a span of nine months in their nearly two year relationship. In response, she said something to the effect of, “Well, maybe you should go be with one of them then…” Since then this colleague has been getting crap from his girlfriend about the comment, though he claims the statement wasn’t directed at her, nor had he made any comments to her about her size in the past. But as one of those guys who consistently hits the gym to keep his frame lean and sculpted, that didn’t mean he hadn’t noticed her weight gain though. And clearly she had too.

It was obvious that this man’s girlfriend had her own insecurities about her weight, that’s why any comment that had to do with another woman’s shape in a more than favorable way had this young woman tightly wound and ready to cut her eyes, huff and puff and remind him of his “egregious” comment every time he thought she had forgot. Clearly, the “I didn’t mean it like that” response just wasn’t going to cut it this time around.

Source: volleywood.net

My boyfriend tried to do his best to offer advice to the confused fella, and as we went over the conversation, in my head, all I could think of was how messy that small situation had turned out to be. All of a sudden we were debating the best way for this man to say something to his girlfriend about her weight gain, and in reality, there didn’t seem to be a good way at all.

I don’t know what it is about it, but these days, when it comes to a woman’s size, unless she’s uncomfortably obese to a point that she’s ill and needs an A&E-type intervention, the best way to get a woman to do something about her weight is to let her come to the realization that she needs to on her own. As someone whose gone through the up and down positive and negative feelings about myself after battling massive weight gain post-college, I can say the only way to really commit to being active and trying to live and eat better is to come to the conclusion that you want better. It becomes ten times easier to do so when you know that other people will support you. Seriously, it’s something that just needs to bother a woman enough to make her want to change on her own.

Having a conversation with yourself about your body is a lot different from a man, a mother, whoever, pointing out the extra roll of fat around your waist or the increasing width of your a**. Instead of getting you motivated to hit the nearest Bally Total Fitness, Lifetime Fitness, Crunch, Gold’s Gym or whatever is in your area, when the man you love tells you that you need to do something about your weight, it more or less makes you want to retreat back into the kitchen to drown your sorrows in a bowl of Edy’s cookies and cream. Okay, okay, a whole carton if you’re really feeling bad. Motivation isn’t what you get, instead you take on added insecurities as you wonder how he sees you, if you look good enough, if he’s looking at other women often and more. And that insecurity can just make the relationship a paranoid, easily irritated, walking-on-eggshells tumultuous one that nobody will be happy in.

If I could offer any advice to my boyfriend’s co-worker, I would tell him to just apologize for the fact that she took his words as a hit on her looks, and to remind her that at almost two years together, he’s clearly not worried about anyone else, nor does he want anyone else but her. Follow that up with some kisses, hugs, and maybe a roll in the hay. But if he really does find himself with big issues when it comes to her even bigger weight, he better be ready to hit the gym with her and be as supportive as possible. Instead of coming outright and making her feel like the Pillsbury Dough girl, he needs to find a way to encourage her to work out with him, and they both need to eat better together. Keyword, together. Because simply saying, “I mean, I’m just saying, you’ve gained a little weight” won’t help her, or get him anywhere but possibly alone. Or better yet, alone in a kitchen covering a bruised eye with a bag of vegetables and his best steak…

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mirnabear.com

The entertainment industry is clear on one thing: If you’re a woman, you need to be thin and if you’re a man you must be in shape to make a living and be successful.  But these entertainers took matters into their own hands and actually made a living – in part or in full – based on being overweight. Check it out!

Read the rest of this entry »

Source: nationalreview.com

The government doesn’t sleep, but I’ll settle for them having a stadium full of seats. Mayor Michael Bloomberg can be the first in line. The NYC politician wants to place a ban on sodas larger than 16 ounces.  Apparently, that’s the biggest problem facing New York and not the 8.1% unemployment rate or the rampant homelessness. Bloomberg has decided that this is the cause for him to put his cape on and fly into action.

His intentions are solid. Obesity is a serious epidemic in this country. While it should be addressed, it should not be legislated to these lengths. He is an elected official, not anyone’s parent or nanny. If he really wanted to stick his nose where it didn’t belong, Bloomberg could use some of the millions if not billions at his disposal and pay off my student loans. He’d get my vote on that. Until then, I need him to get himself all the way together. How can you be against soda but support National Donut Day? I’ll wait.

Not only is this proposed law a government overreach dictating what a person can buy with their own money, but it also falls flat when you really think about it. Sure, you can ban the sale of oversized sodas and try and control portions, but I can just as easily buy two small sizes. Or three. Or four. I’ll chug on a bottle of Pepsi and cheer to the friggin’ weekend while protestors side eye me with pickets raised high in the air. In my best Rihanna voice, “No1Currr!”

Diabetes, obesity and other health related dangers that high sugar intake can cause is very real. It shouldn’t be taken lightly. However, Big Brother needs to fall back on trying to limit choices just because they wouldn’t make the same ones. Bloomberg is not going to get a medal or ticker tape parade for attempting to mandate good health practices. He’ll likely have a riot. The government can’t even balance the federal budget and put suffering Americans back to work, yet they want to occupy vending machines and fast food joints? Are cupcakes, pretzels and candy next on the most wanted list?  I’ve got a birth certificate that says I’m old enough to decide for myself what I want to drink and at what size I want to drink it. I’m not the only grown person insulted by the government’s interference as to what I’m supposed to be quenching my thirst with.

While he might have good intentions, don’t fool yourselves into thinking that these good measures won’t pave the way for more laws for the “common good.” Some women choose to put that creamy crack into their hair every 4 to 6 weeks. I do. I’m too lazy to find another way to get my hair layed quick, so does that mean folks might decide that the chemicals in perms might mess me up and will determine how I use one? Uncle Sam might even decide next to ban tampons because it might lead to toxic shock syndrome. Think all that sounds ridiculous? So is putting the blame on soda for obesity and trying to place a Band-Aid on an issue that will not solve the problem.

I love my neighbors and I want what’s best for them. I want every person to be healthy, but it just can’t be done by force. It needs to be of a person’s free will to lead a healthy lifestyle. So until then, please pass the Pepsi.

You won’t be able to get a super-sized soda but you can buy Newports by the carton?! Where they do that at? Oh, that’s right. They want to start in New York.

Follow Stephanie Guerilus @qsteph

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theprayingwoman.com

When “Glee” actress Amber Riley fainted at a red carpet event recently, rumors swirled that her new diet was the cause. Amber took to Twitter after the incident to dispel rumors, saying she would “never starve [herself] to fit clothes.”

The 25-year-old actress, who has recently dropped at least two dress sizes, says that she lost the weight by cutting out fast food and sticking to a new diet and exercise plan.  She said she has always been comfortable with her size but just wanted to be healthier.

Of course being healthy is paramount, but beyond that, does size really matter? It does if you ask the people told to lose weight because they’re obese by BMI standards or the ones that are told they are too skinny and need to put some meat on their bones.

Celebrities are under intense pressure to maintain a certain size because every pound gained or lost is a potential magazine cover story (think about how Jessica Simpson was treated), but this pressure seems to apply to more than just those who are paid for how they look. And without a standard, contentment must be found when looking in your own mirror because feedback from the outside world is often conflicting.

For one, many of us have no idea what size we really wear because sizes vary from store to store. In one shopping trip, one might purchase a pair of jeans in a size 4, 6 and 10 — yet those jeans might all fit the same.

This common experience makes the obsession with size strange because there isn’t a universal way to measure it (no pun intended). Sure there are ballparks, but if you’re looking into buying a weight loss product that promises you’ll drop a size in a week, you’re probably better off just buying a different brand of jeans.

The second issue – especially in the black community – is that some men claim weight is an important factor in choosing women to date, so many women tailor themselves to fit a shallow standard. But one man’s “thick chick” is another’s “overweight neighbor” and one man’s “slim sweetheart” is another’s “too skinny friend.” We’re better off just finding someone who is content with our size rather than trying to fit into one man’s narrow preferences, but some people would rather play shapeshifter.

You can barely watch television these days without seeing Jennifer Hudson, Janet Jackson and Mariah Carey endorsing popular weight loss products. At the same time, gossip sites demanded answers after paparazzi pictures surfaced of Avatar’s Zoe Saldana walking down the street looking too skinny for her skinny jeans.  When the famously thin actress starred in the film Colombiana, she prompted one writer to say, “female action stars have gotten too skinny to throw a believable punch.” (Ouch!)

However, sometimes, the size pressures placed on black women are even tougher than those placed on other cultures. Anyone can shrink their whole body, but on the flipside, the pursuit of video vixen style prominent bosoms, flat abs, and enormous derrieres is a tall order for someone who is not genetically shaped that way.

I’ll never forget the time one of my friend’s showed me her booty booster. I’m not sure what the proper name was for that painful looking contraption, but when she put it on underneath her jeans, it significantly boosted her backside.

“Guys like girls with big butts” she told me with a shrug.

Of course “guys like girls with big boobs” too and that is undoubtedly where the inspiration behind padded push up bras — such as Victoria Secret’s “Miraculous” bra — come from. But who really wants to carry around all that extra material just to give off an illusion and to feel good about themselves? There are an excessive amount of devices created to enhance, diminish, distort, and constrict a woman into looking a particular way, but all that stuff has to come off at some point and you’re left feeling inadequate with what you’ve been given naturally. That’s sad.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s important to take pride in our appearance, but there is a fine line between a healthy desire to look our best and unhealthy desperation to be a certain size and have certain curves. And with all the images directed at us acting as though only black women are big yet other images saying being skinny and less than curvy is out of style aren’t helping us get any more healthy. Maybe crazy, but not healthy.

Besides, when taking your full potential into consideration and what it is you bring to this world, does the fact that you’re a slim sista or “thicker than a Snicker” really matter anyway?

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Source: Global Grind

With all the dramatic rumors flying around about Fantasia and her money, her man and her career in general, it’s nice to see the new mommy (who gave birth in December) all smiles and showing off her post-baby curve-a-licious body. Homegirl gave her own short locks a break and was seen at a recent event in North Carolina with long, flowing extensions with some really cute bangs. She also showed up in this multi-colored dress with slits in the arms and pink, strappy stilettos. She, like Bey, is embracing her added curves since giving birth, and it’s nice to see her looking in good spirits. For a minute there, we were getting worried about the direction of things in Fanny’s life (and we still are a little), what with Antwaun Cook allegedly wanting to go back to his ex and the singer having to sell her home for a lot less than she paid, but we’ll continue to hope for the best. Make that money, honey and hurry up and put out a new album! “I’m Doin’ Me” was the jam…

What do you think of her new look?

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Source: hellobeautiful.com

Who needs to sweat at the local gym and lose the hard way when you can insert a tube into your body, lose your appetite for more than a week, and lose about 10-20 pounds in 10 days!?

If you really think the latter is a better option, shame on you.

But that’s what some women are doing to help get them in tip-top shape for their big day. It’s known as the K-E Diet. The ultimate in crash dieting, brides-to-be insert a tube through their nose, which runs to the stomach. According to ABC News, they’re fed a constant slow drip of the protein and fat they need, mixed with water that has no carbohydrates, and tops around 800 calories a day. During this feeding, body fat is burned off through a process called “ketosis,” which can still leave your muscles in good shape.

Dr. Oliver Di Pietro, a Florida-based doctor, seems to think the diet is a great and effective way to lose weight, even if it does sound…over-the-top as hell.

“It is a hunger-free, effective way of dieting,” Di Pietro said. “Within a few hours and your hunger and appetite go away completely, so patients are actually not hungry at all for the whole 10 days. That’s what is so amazing about this diet.”

Yeah, “amazing.” That’s the word I was thinking of (no, actually, I was going for crazy.) No need for hospitalization during the process, you just carry the bag around with you and keep the tube in your nose non-stop for 10 days. Aside from some possible uncomfortable constipation and generally bad breath, Dr. Di Pietro says the diet is good to go if you don’t have the time to devote to a strict workout regimen. Except if you have kidney issues, of course. If you do, you should stay far away from the diet.

I understand the want to fit in the gown of your dreams, but I hope women like this put just as much effort into their marriages as they do trying to fit in a dress they’re going to wear for one day.  This whole wedding culture is getting a tad bit insane. I mean, Dr. Di Pietro actually charges $1,500 for this 10-day weight loss plan. Just think what money like that could be used for, but instead it’s being used to help you drastically lose weight to feel good for one day. Is it ever really that serious?

Would you ever consider trying the K-E Diet? Why or why not?

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