All Articles Tagged "weddings"
As I get older and celebrate one birthday after another, I always get asked, “So, do you feel older?” I usually don’t–until my aunts and cousins bombard me with questions about marriage and motherhood. “When are you getting married?” “Don’t you think it’s about time for you to have kids?” I always justify my current single status by saying I’m not even dating and would at least need to be in a committed relationship before we start talking engagements and children. During these conversations, I don’t find myself second-guessing where I’m at in life. But as wedding season rolls around each spring and summer, I log on to Facebook or Instagram, and there’s always a new “She Said Yes!” post coming from acquaintances. That is when I find myself fighting off the jealousy that’s brewing within me.
As of late, I’ve noticed that I get asked at least twice a day why “a woman like me” is single. What does that even mean? But the truth is, I have internalized the idea that I don’t have the time or energy to put in a real effort when it comes to building with someone. Let’s be honest, it’s a load of bull, and I really feel it when I have no one to share my successes with. Or when friends ask me to double date, and I’m left to look at the invisible man standing next to me during outings.
I think about the never-ending claim that men make about women being too independent to date. Sometimes I wonder, could it be true? While I am independent, I don’t necessarily give off the vibe that I don’t need someone can’t take care of me and that a man is incapable of doing so. Even if I did, it wouldn’t be true. Will Smith said it best in Hitch:
“Basic principles – no woman wakes up saying ‘God, I hope I don’t get swept off my feet today!’ Now, she might say ‘This is a really bad time for me,’ or something like ‘I just need some space,’ or my personal favorite, ‘I’m really into my career right now.’ You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? Cause she’s lying to you, that’s why. You understand me? Lying! It’s not a bad time for her. She doesn’t need any space. And she may be into her career, but what she’s really saying is ‘Uh, get away from me now,’ or possibly ‘Try harder, stupid,’ but which one is it? Sixty percent of all human communication is nonverbal body language; Thirty percent is your tone, so that means ninety percent of what you’re saying ain’t coming out of your mouth. Of course she’s going to lie to you! She’s a nice person! She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings! What else is she going to say? She doesn’t even know you… yet. Luckily, the fact is that just like the rest of us, even a beautiful woman doesn’t know what she wants until she sees it, and that’s where I come in.”
Yes, I had to quote the entire monologue.
While it isn’t wise to date just because you’re lonely, I find myself yearning for a companion, someone to share my life with. With a handful of friends, relatives, male acquaintances and sorority sisters getting engaged and married, it’s becoming harder for me to ignore my ticking biological clock. I don’t feel older, but I do feel myself going through the beginning stages of a quarter-life crisis. It’s wedding season, and I feel left out. As the last friend in my circle to still be single, I find that the conversation is shifting between us all. While they’re gushing over wedding plans, bridal showers, where they wish to live with their partner after they’re married, and how many children they want, I chime in, but I know I’m further off course than they are. Some days I sit and daydream about this guy who’s supposedly going to find me so that I can one day talk mindlessly about some of the same things.
But I could be in the way of that guy finding me. Coming from a committed relationship of six years and being single for two, I must admit that fear is holding me back. I lost myself during those six years and having worked these past two years to find her again, I’m fearful that committing would mean giving up all I’ve worked for. I’m partly to blame for my own loneliness. I’ve assumed that I need to focus on me and my career, and I need to be established before I can worry about being with someone else. But as I sit at my laptop RSVP’ing for weddings and receptions with no plus-one, I can’t help but wonder, when will time reveal who’s going to sweep me off my feet? And more importantly, will I let them?
Who says wedding season has to be stul? Play your cards right and summer’s biggest party season could be the best of the year.
Aah, weddings. A night full of love, laughter, and the sanctity of matrimony — that you just might be paying for the rest of your lawfully wedded life. The costs of tying the knot has skyrocketed to an all-time high of $31,213, CNBC reports.
Those wedding bells are quickly morphing into alarm bells as the price tag of the average wedding climbed up 4.5 percent from previous year ($29,858), according to The Knot’s annual Real Wedding study. If we’re looking at the past four years, wedding costs climbed 16 percent, MarketWatch said.
“I think it goes beyond inflation,” said Dhanusha Sivajee, executive vice president of marketing for The Knot’s parent XO Group.”We’ve seen the amount of guests go down but the amount of spend per guest go up.”
Of course, the more affluent the bride, the more expensive the wedding will be, but Sivajee points out that the study spotted an uptick in spending even among lower income wives-to-be. Love birds are also shelling out more cash on the reception — along with cocktail hour — than they did a couple years ago. The ceremony itself, though, is getting less attention and affection when it comes to funding.
Sticking to a budget, the study found, has proven to be become increasingly difficult for the bride and groom.
“Last year, 45 percent of couples said they busted their budget, while 23 percent said they didn’t even have a budget to begin with,” CNBC added.
On average, Americans spend $14,006 on a venue, $3,587 on reception performers, $5,855 on the engagement ring, $2,556 on the photographer, 2,141 on flowers and decor, $1,357 on the wedding dress, $1,206 on the rehearsal dinner, $439 on invitations, and lastly, $275 on party favors, according to MarketWatch.
“The cost of getting married in the U.S. also happens to be exactly the same — give or take $92 — as a 15% down payment on a median-priced home worth $208,700,” MarketWatch added. Whew!
The love birds aren’t the only ones feeling the financial heat. Guests, too, feel the crunch when it comes to weddings. According to a poll conducted by American Consumer Credit Counseling, 43 percent of Americans declined a wedding invitation due to financial constraints — 36 percent went into debt to attend a friend’s wedding.
The Knot’s Real Wedding study surveyed 16,000 couples throughout the United States.
Just when you thought you’ve seen enough Starbucks cups on your Instagram timeline…
It appears that America’s hipster alternative to Dunkin Donuts is also the perfect place to begin or end a wedding day. Yes folks, #StarbucksWedding is officially a thing.
As reported by Grazia Daily:
One couple took it a step further and actually took their vows inside a branch of the famous chain. DeAnna Dodson, 31, and Jordan Senz, 32, of Janesville, Wisconsin wed in a Starbucks on New Year’s Eve and their vows included the statements: “I promise to love you a latte” and “I want to macchiato an honest woman out of you.”
Now, in the plethora of odd places to get married or celebrate one’s wedding, a coffee shop is not the worst. But something does seem cheesy about standing in line during midday rush to get your #WeddingLatte.
Read more about Starbucks Weddings at StyleBlazer.com
I’m a firm believer in saving for the things you really want instead of buying them on impulse. This is probably one of the reasons why my husband and I made the decision to stay engaged longer than a year.
Weddings cost more than a pretty penny.
Thank God we took some time because it allowed more on our end to do our research and check out all the available options. After reading this article in The Huffington Post about wedding myths, it looks like we didn’t fall into tons of “wedding traps” that try to get more money out of couples.
Myth – Friday weddings are less expensive than Saturday weddings
This might have been true many years ago, but isn’t super practical these days. My guy and I looked at a Friday event but decided it wasn’t a major savings compared to the traditional Saturday evening. Most Friday and Saturday evening events book quickly–or require you to share common spaces if you happen to wed in a multi-room venue. To help reduce costs, we chose a Saturday wedding that began in the late morning and continued through late afternoon. By doing so we were able to save over $100 off the price per person and serve classic dinner items for lunch like filet mignon and Chilean sea bass.
Myth – The size of your bridal party doesn’t impact your budget
Yes the more people in your wedding party, the greater potential it has to impact your budget. But that’s not always the case. I had five women in my bridal party: my best friend (matron of honor), a close friend (maid of honor), my sister and my husband’s two sisters. I really didn’t spend additional money on them. For starters, I purchased all of my wedding and reception flowers wholesale. Shipped directly from a farmer in South America, I literally had hundreds of fresh blooms in my house two days before the wedding. Because of this, I was able to create bouquets for each bridesmaid that didn’t cost anything extra. For their gift I had a close friend of mine who’s an airbrush makeup artist doll them up for the day. In total, each of their bouquets cost around $9 (you can save buying in bulk) and their make up was $45. Not bad.
Myth – Save money by hosting the wedding in a city park
Kudos to anyone who goes this route. I personally did not want to deal with coordinating different vendors (remember, you need food, seating and serveware) or worrying about who would/wouldn’t show up on time. There’s also the issue of transportation that can add to your bill. By having our wedding and reception in one place, we were able to consolidate everything that took the research part off our hands. Our ceremony was held in the outdoor garden and the reception in the grand ballroom.
At the end of the day, it’s important to research what works best for you and your future spouse. Everyone has different needs and preferences.
What are some wedding myths you found to be true or untrue?
Would you hire a bridesmaid?
Before, you give a quick response, let’s talk about the person who created this new career path. After being a bridesmaid at many weddings and observing the stress that came along with planning a wedding, Jen Glatz posted a CraigsList advertisement for people to hire her as a bridesmaid. The response to her ad was overwhelming and thus inspired her business, Bridesmaid For Hire.
Based on the bride’s budget and needs, Glatz and her team create a package that would be suitable. There are four packages to create from:
Includes 1:1 consultation sessions, via our online video
collaboration tool, to assist with planning, problem solving,
and putting together itineraries and to-do lists.
Are you a Maid of Honor or a Bride-to-be who needs some
behind the scenes help? We’ll be there for you with weekly sessions,
via our online video collaboration tool, to assist in the ongoing planning
and facilitating of events and activities leading up-to the wedding.
Includes everything listed in the ‘Undercover
Bridesmaid’ package, plus in-person ground support
at pre-wedding events & the day of the wedding.
Bridesmaid by Your Side.™
Includes everything listed in the ‘Undercover
Bridesmaid’ package, plus actual participation as
a bridesmaid or maid-of-honor in the wedding party.
When asked if they would hire a bridesmaid, many said there was no reason to because they have committed friends and family members. Although, the Bridesmaid For Hire’s FAQ page tells a very different story which some of us have unfortunately witnessed:
Weddings are expensive for friends and family. For many, it requires traveling hundreds of miles to attend engagement parties, showers, and the actual day itself. If you’re in the bridal party, it often requires a big commitment in time and energy. While you may want to have specific friends and family as part of your “big day” they may not be able to fly across the country to help you shop for a dress, know where to start when it comes to planning your bridal shower, or have the evenings open to chat on the phone about what’s on your to-do list that week and the wedding challenges and roadblocks you’re knocking into. By hiring a Professional Bridesmaid, you can still honor your friends and family by having them be your bridesmaids, but without the burden or the “dirty work”. The Professional Bridesmaid does all the heavy lifting – so you and your girls can focus on the fun!
Glatz also serves as the bride’s assistant instead of being a wedding planner. By focusing on the needs of the bride and helping her pick out a wedding dress or honeymoon lingerie, Glatz’s mission is to make the bride feel comfortable with her wedding day choices. Glatz and her team’s prices start at $199 and can climb to over $1100, and they are also offering job opportunities to those who want to become a professional bridesmaids.
Do you think you have what it takes? Check out the video segment of Bridesmaid For Hire, below.
According to research conducted by Emory University, couples who spent more on engagement rings and weddings were more likely to divorce than those who opted for less expensive options.
In a survey conducted on 3,000 married folks, researchers found that men who spent between $500 and $2,000 on an engagement ring were 1.3 times less likely to wind up divorced than those who spent $2,000 to $4,000. The same study revealed that women whose wedding costs exceeded $20,000 were 3.5 times more likely to end up divorced than those who spent $5,000 to $10,000.
Interestingly, the study went on to reveal that skimming when it comes to purchasing an engagement ring also decreased the chances of a couple living happily ever after. Men who shelled out less than $500 on engagement rings also experienced higher divorce rates. Couples who spent less than $1,000 on their weddings decreased the chances of divorce. Though bigger guest lists generally equate to a pricier wedding ceremony, the study also found that having more weddings guests led to longer marriages.
Coordinators of the study believe that the link between divorce rates and costly weddings and engagement rings had to do with brides and grooms wanting to create the perfect wedding day—even if they aren’t in the position to afford the costs. As for what’s pushing couples to place this unnecessary pressure on themselves, researchers are blaming the bridal industry.
“In 1959, Bride’s recommended that couples set aside two months to prepare for their wedding and published a checklist with 22 tasks for them to complete. By the 1990s, the magazine recommended 12 months of wedding preparation and published a checklist with 44 tasks to complete.”
Researchers also point out that there’s not much evidence that supports the wedding industry’s underlying message that extravagant ceremonies equate to positive marital outcomes.
“The wedding industry has consistently sought to link wedding spending with long-lasting marriages,” Emory University economic professors Andrew M. Francis and Hugo M. Mialon wrote.
According to The Knot, the average wedding costs about $30,000. Things that make you go hmmm…
The day you get married may be the most important day of your life. And what was a special day for some lucky ordinary folk turned into an even more memorable occasion when these celebrity wedding crashers popped up out of nowhere.
Beyonce and Jay Z
After Beyonce wrapped up her successful “On The Run” tour with her hubby Jay Z here in the U.S., the couple took some much needed time off for a little rest and relaxation before gearing up for the European leg of the tour. They have been unwinding in Italy and the “Drunk In Love” singer stumbled upon a wedding after walking into a local church in Portofino. Even though she was severely underdressed with her bikini, sheer wrap and straw hat on, Beyonce happily obliged and took photos with the surprised bride and groom.
We’ve heard of quite a few stories over the years where an angry wife took to the Internet to expose her cheating husband. But this story has a bit of a different twist. An Australian newlywed by the name of Dan recently took to Gum Tree (similar to Craigslist) to resell his wife’s wedding dress in a post titled, “Wedding Dress for Bride Seeking Eventual Infidelity.” Judging by the post, the poor guy discovered that his wife of two years cheated (or planned to cheat) with his best friend! The posting reads:
“Due to be married soon? Not planning on staying faithful? Want to sleep with one of your soon-to-be husband’s closest friends? Then THIS is the wedding dress for you.
This stunning, tuille swathed, ivory bridal gown has a proven track record of producing an adulterous, deceitful, double-crossing and traitorous ‘soulmate.’
A one of a kind garment designed by Benedict Arnold, believed to be derived from the very cloth Judas Iscariot himself wore to the Garden of Gethsemane to betray the only son of God – Jesus Christ.
This harlot-sized ensemble will make you the envy of your trampish posse on your fraudulent wedding day.
As an added bonus, this dress gives you the ‘entitlement’ to legally obtain over half of your husband-to-be’s worldly possessions.
This dress is guaranteed to provide you with approximately two years of reasonable wedded mediocrity before the complete and utter disintegration of your relationship due to your extramarital promiscuity.
Cosmetically, the garment is in better condition than the marriage – not looking for much. Make an offer.”
Since the post was first made on June 8, it has been viewed close to 200,000 times; however, the dress has yet to be sold. Poor thing.
Last week we told you about the Tennessee bride who walked down the aisle with her one month old baby on the train of her Vera Wang wedding dress. We posted the photo, hoping that it was a photoshopped image, a joke for the internet.
But sadly it was not. And the bride, Shona Carter-Brooks took to Facebook to defend her decision.
“People questioning what we do, commenting all negative, and just doing the most. We good though we covered by the Blood which never loose its power. So to the media, radio, news and whomever else wanting to talk about what WE do here you go:
Media Media I see how it works regardless the situation or purpose people gone have something negative to say!
The answer is we do what we want, when we want, as long as Jesus on our side everything worked out fine and gona continue to be fine.”
And as the criticism kept coming in, Carter-Brooks took to her Facebook page again.
“FB family & friends we are outstanding! See we not weary in well doing, for in due season this too shall pass! We rejoicing for we’re too driven to be drowned, victorious to be defeated, and content for God is able! We love you all for your support, love and encouraging words.”
Later she joked with her new husband, that she was was glad they are not celebrities and then wrote “oops got fans, guess we is!”
She concluded her statements, suggesting that all the naysayers “get a life.”
Girl… Yes thank God He, Jesus and the Holy Ghost are watching over your little girl because anything could have happened to her on the ground, from dust flying up and getting into her eye, to her falling out of the “well secured” harness. Clearly, Carter-Brooks hasn’t seen the error of her ways; but really the fact that you carried your flowers, inanimate objects, in your hands, while your baby was being dragged across the floor, shows just how far off your priorities were that day.
There are more pictures from the day below.
And here’s the precious baby girl where she’s supposed to be, in her parent’s arms.