All Articles Tagged "true life"
The dating game is hard. And there are certain things many of us shouldn’t stand for. But when it comes to children things can get a little tricky. We asked our Facebook and Twitter followers whether or not they would date a man with multiple children, why or why not and how many is too many. See what they had to say.
Steffon: I could date a man with multiple children but it depends on how many multiples and more importantly how many mommas!
When it comes to our hair, there’s always someone ready and willing to jump in and provide their two cents. They’re not paying for the up keep, in most cases they’re not taking care of it. They just know how they like for you to wear your hair. So if you decide to cut it off, wear a different style or go natural, please believe your sisters, cousins, man or father will have something to say about it. We checked in with our Facebook and Twitter followers to see what types of comments people have made about their hair.
City Girl: Let my relaxer grow out and my sister said just the other day I was trying to be “African.”
Yolanda: So much, it’s too short, get a weave, take your weave out,weave too long, braids too long, go natural. Just do you!
JC: I get the I must be gay comments too because I wear it short. I also get I look too harsh o_O. Whatever, lol
MzMakeup: From a Natural Hair Nazi that judged me for putting heat in my head from flat iron or blow dry.
Whitney: yes! A black girl told me my natural hair made me look masculine. She can’t grow her own hair though : /
Veyonce: Yes cut my mid back length hair to a bob my cousin stopped speaking to me
Nicole: Absolutely. Mostly from my Dad. Everybody else is cool with and haven’t really made any rude comments except him. He’s cooled down recently. I guess he’s getting used to it.
Angela: Yes! I’ve been natural for 8 months. I recently started wearing my own hair out in different natural styles. My family has been the most brutal. White people give me the best compliments.
Alesia: Not flack, necessarily, but several years ago I reverted from natural back to flat ironed hair, an an older black woman I know very casually “complimented” me by telling how much nicer and professional my hair looked. o_0
Kenneka: HEEEEEELLLL YEAH!! Like our friend MIGUEL said, blacks are the most negative against our own people. I cut my hair off to what you would call a TWA by way of the big chop over a year ago. It’s like I immediately got the stank stare. I have gotten a few compliments from other “naturals,” but honey the others…”why did you have to cut your hair?!” “your hair is TOO natural,”and the list goes on. Mainly from family and those who have known me since my longer, relaxed hair days. But yeah. I always say, you won’t hear it from whites or Hispanics and Asians…any other race, but our own? We are soooo warped into believing that you have to be a certain skin tone, or have your hair a certain way to be pretty. it’s really sad.
Minnie: I say it’s on my head, so it’s none of your business
Karema: Yes, I got sick of wearing weaves because it was damaging my edges from being braided too tight. So last month I cut my hair all off in a cute style to regrow it healthy. All the women loved it but of course the men said ” why you do that?” or the just make a sour puss face. I love it short and I do not regret it.
Melody: Yes. After I transitioned and embraced my Afrocentricity, my ‘WASBAND’ told me I resembled the football player Rosey Grier from behind, and that’s not what he signed on for; I now BASK in MY glory!
Zain: I def received flack from my male “friends” bc I wear a weave that mimics natural hair. According to them, I’m not natural BC my choice of a protective style is not my real hair. These are the same group of men that believe that 4c hair isn’t as attractive as 3c hair… I’ve been natural for 17 years…the flack let’s me know I’m doing something right…
Did you just graduate college or will you graduate soon? Well, listen up love this right here’s for YOU. We spoke to the wise women on our Facebook and Twitter pages to find out what they wish they knew about the “real world’ before they graduated from college. (Some took offense to the term real world; but truth be told, for most college students, college provides an escape from “real world” responsibilities. So we think it’s applicable.) Either way, if you want an accurate picture of what you’re in for, check out some of the wisdom our followers have to share.
Most of us have been there. We break up with a man and vow never to speak to him again. But in the back of your mind you silently hope that he still wants you. And proves this fact by trying to get in touch with you. That may be what you want to happen; but it’s not going the way you planned it. Homeboy has not reached out. You’re wondering if he still cares, if there’s a chance you can make it work etc. So what do you do? You call him. We asked our Facebook followers if this story sounded familiar to them. This is what they had to say.
Tia: Yes I have.. No regrets but I should have kept my word to myself
Lina: Yes but I came to my senses and left him alone but still love him
Damita: I ended up regretting it because he has issues he has to fix on his own. Plus, I found out he had a hidden addiction! #OnlyGodCanFixHim!;(( very sad sight!
Brenda: I didn’t go back 2 him but I slept with him & I felt so dirty so NEVER EVER AGAIN.
Myisha: Just reached out to my deadbeat baby daddy today. Smh, why!? I don’t know. Got me nowhere!
Nita: Yep called him today. Picked back up like we never left off. Can’t help who your heart loves.
Alicia: Yes I have and no regrets. He is my husband now and we are happy together.
Tezra: Yes I did. I explained I just wanted to be friends but he couldn’t respect that so I cut the cord. Never again I told him that I should have stayed away but my heart wasn’t clear but when I expressed my feelings I ended it forever.
Monique: I have someone now I would like to call but.. .it’s not going to happen. I learned my lesson. But I miss the person I fell for…not the person he proved himself to be.
Samantha: Yup. a few years ago I was in a verbally abusive relationship & broke up with him. Thought I made a mistake, then reached out to him and made up with him. The relationship got worse & almost became physically abusive then I ended it for good. I can’t say that I regret it because if I never had that experience I wouldn’t be able to recognize red flags in future dating situations. Besides when Mr. Right does come along, I’ll be that much more grateful for him!
Jasmine: Yes. Can’t help what the heart wants but our only issue is we were too intense to be so young and it didn’t work. Sure, at least once a week I am shaking my head at him but we love each other, are great friends and find it hard to be away from each other too long.
Jacqueline: Yes…when I did let him come over after 13 months of being apart, he got drunk and peed on my floor….
Aj: Nope, I’m like Rosa Parks….I refuse to go back
Leah: Yes. I dreamt about my father dying three months before he died. I told him to go see a doctor. He unfortunately did not listen and he died on Father’s Day fourteen years ago.
Randi: I have correctly had a dream that both my cousins were pregnant and with one, I dreamt of the sex and I was right.
As quiet as it’s kept, May is national month. Some of us have no problem taking care of business and pleasuring ourselves. Others of us don’t understand what the hype’s all about and then there are some of us who feel like “self love” is despicable…against God’s will even. We asked our Facebook followers if they knew about the month and why they feel some women are hesitant to talk about it. See what they had to say about it.
Flavia: Cause society teaches us to be ashamed of our bodies and of our sexuality. While men are raised to embrace it and be proud.
Martina: All women don’t do it. It’s not a fear thing. It’s a preference.
We only have a few answers this week because we were all prepping for “Scandal.” But this week we asked our Facebook and Twitter followers when was the last time they hurt someone, whether it was intentional or not and if they apologized. See what they had to say.
Valencia: Monday! I apologized and then kicked him out my life because he’s too manipulative!! Stupid a#s Libra!
Shantel: Today actually. I hurt my son’s feelings It was not intentional. He vomited on my carpet and I was frustrated over that, and he thought I was mad at him. He even wrote me an apology letter, which I found after he went to bed. I will definitely be apologizing to him in the morning.
Kiana: Last week. My husband and I got into a really bad argument. I felt horrible about it and apologized for the things I said. I still feel horrible about it.
Mimi: The janitor on my job was cleaning my work station& I thought she was rearranging it. I snapped at her & didn’t realize until I got closer to my station that she was using a swiffer duster to clean my desk. (I should have known better. She cleans EVERY nook & cranny). I did apologize after-the-fact & it made me feel better when she said, “I’m not worried about you because you have a beautiful & fair personality.”
Senita: First,I always apologize when Im wrong- that’s a strength of mine…I cant recall hurting anyone’s feelings in quite some time though-tbh. Im not into that.
Michelle: A couple months ago. A girl in my classes was talking about a guy that she had broken up with. he had cancer for over a year or two and she took care of him during his treatments… that didn’t stop him from leaving and kicking her out of the home that they shared for a couple years as soon as he got a little better then completely ignoring her for weeks. she was trying to use his sickness as an excuse to why he was acting like an A$$.. I let her know that just because someone gets sick that doesn’t mean that they’re automatically a good person. his actions where showing that he didn’t care about her and i told her wasn’t into her ( at least not anymore) and that she should move on because he was an asshole. it made her cry and she left the class for that day… I told her i felt bad for making her cry the next time i saw her… I wasn’t sorry about what I said though.
Let’s back into time…way back into time. Like when you were in high school. While some of us have pretty much stayed the same over the years, a good number of us did a 180. We hit up our Facebook and Twitter followers to see how they’ve changed over the year. See what they had to say.
Rita: Good question. I was a nice girl-at the same time…I goofed around a bit. And yes they would be surprised to see the type of woman I’ve become…more so proud of me. lol
Emicia: I went to LaGuardia High so we were like Glee before Glee LoL. Kelis and Nicki Minaj were there the same time as me actually. Like my classmates, I was eclectic, artistic and mildly socially awkward LoL. I am the same now, just with less egoism and more altruism.
Shana: I was in the band, not so cute with glasses, not popular but people knew who I was. A lot of people are surprised to see the type of woman I am now. I’m a school teacher & a model. All the people that dissed me before are starting to regret their choice.
Devin: I don’t think they would be surprised because I have always been the laughing type but got my work done…
Alexis: I was reserved, quiet, mostly stayed to myself, the studious girl, kept a small but very close circle of friends. I think they’d be surprised to learn I am much more social than I was back then….and probably a lot more congenial. Lol
Markisha: Good, quiet girl, slight tomboy and kept a job. Today The same. No surprise I’m a go getter.
MsParker: I was a Itchbay — it was a defense mechanism after being bullied. Now people say I am one of the sweetest and approachable people.
Andrea: Quiet. A lil freak, now…I speak up for myself and I’m a better freak !!! Lol
Mmderosier: Quiet girl with a book surgically attached to her hands. Nope. Still the same.
Dava: I was a well rounded introvert. I was very involved in school, graduated at the top of my class, known and loved by many. People would be thoroughly surprised to hear about the downward spiral I went through shortly after leaving high school, but would also totally believe that I am steadily making my way back to the person I thought I’d grow up to be back then.
Margaret: I was very quiet and shy. I got picked on quite a bit. But I still have the same friends so they’ve seen me grow.
April: I was the quiet observer. I knew everyone’s business because no one didn’t pay me any attention. I only pushed myself when, the topic excited me, but since graduation, I’ve done everything I said I’d do.
Nicole: Oh yes..that girl I was she and she was me! But I’m teaming up with the Lord now..all about trying to get right.
Sarita: I was really reserved back then I was silly but introverted. People would probably be surprised by me now. I’m proud and outspoken these days. My confidence has gone up. When motherhood began my life as a door mat ended lol
TrebleClef: I was the type that would try to buy friends because I was overweight. Those same people arent worth the occasional school lunch I bought them. Lol I have better friends now.
Alisha: The only people who are surprised are the judgmental church folks who said I would never amount to anything because I didn’t follow everything they said. I asked questions and had my own mind. That’s still true today and it has granted me much success.
Sol: I was a shy skinny Christian jock. Now I’m a plump outspoken heathen.
Nothing tests romance more than mismanaged finances. But typically people regard their money as personal business. At the same time, you know the way a man manages his money can potentially ruin a long term serious relationship or marriage. We asked our Facebook followers when they start monitoring their partners and how they spend their money. See what they had to say.
Nancy: The way they handle money says a lot about them. I’d keep a cautious eye out.
Shamika: Oh I definitely keep an eye on it. Financial problems are one of the major reasons for break ups. If you have a financially irresponsible partner, that can cause all sorts of problems.
From little girls, most of us fantasized about what we would be doing with our lives once we “got big.” Some of us have always known what we wanted to do, some of us were discouraged from our plans and others of us changed our dreams along the way. We asked our Facebook and Twitter followers this question. See what they had to say.
Shaunty: I always wanted to be a medical doctor as a child. I am just about near finished with medical school. Thank you Lord for fulfillment o my dreams.
Angelia: A Solid Gold Dancer… my dreams changed, just a bit…
Alicia: A teacher…and that’s who I am!
Susanne: A pediatrician; my fear/dislike of blood ended that dream ;o)
Yolanda: Ironically, a teacher but then faith stepped in a I became a professor!
Mizzus: A fashion designer…I became school behavior specialist…close enough. lol.
Carmen: Always wanted to be a singer and I am.
Lynnette: I wanted yo be a wife and mother. Stay at home and take care of my family. That’s what i am today. Three beautiful children and married 20 years. God is good!
Mimi: Singer and still trying to reach that dream!
Jeanne: An actress, a dancer, a performer…didn’t do it thanks to my parents who thought that was stereotypical of black people to always ‘entertain’. I should’ve followed my dreams…
Lifeis: A singer.. I am a IT specialist.. I knew my parents should have sent me to performing arts.
Veronica: I wanted to be a vampire, lol! Then it changed to fashion designer. Now I own my own business and work from home to be with my daughters. Everything worked out.
Jocelyn: A pediatrician…nope, I got my PhD in Cell and Molecular though so I did stay in the science/biomedical research realm.
Ruthe: I wanted to be a writer. And that’s exactly what I do. I am living my passion, as an author and journalist.
Shayla: Wanted to be in the military!!! I did that and I’m a veteran as well!!! And doing very well for myself!!
Kristen: I wanted to become a lawyer. My dream changed drastically after seeing so much nepotism and injustice within my city.
Jessica: All i wanted was to be happy and i am
Sandra: Well, I wanted to be an airplane. (Shame face). I thought they were beautiful and was fascinated with the fact that they could fly. Needless to say I was horribly disappointed. But hey, I’m an accountant now
@TrgdyAnn: I wanted to be a Nun when I was a little girl, yes, my dreams definitely took a detour, LoL
Jacqueline: Actress, dancer, or performer. I’m currently getting a PhD in biomedical science. Life is funny
Lillian: I wanted to be a horse, fortunately I changed my mind.
Kelly: Sad to say I wanted to be a drug dealers Itchbay as a little girl. My dreams changed and I am now a college graduate working in Corporate America making a decent living for myself. Parents should be careful about what they subject their kids to. Children are easily influenced and can sometimes be misdirected….I was!