All Articles Tagged "STDs"
By the time most couples get to the point where they’re engaged, one would think that it’s safe to assume that they know most of the important things about one another. You know the big stuff like the debt situation, whether there are any children from previous relationships running around and of course, preexisting health conditions. Unfortunately, one bride-to-be learned that her fiancé has been harboring a major secret that could potentially change her life forever.
In a post shared to Reddit, the 27-year-old woman who goes by the name ButHeTreatsMeWell explained how she discovered that her fiancé, who suffers from depression and anxiety, is being treated for the herpes virus. According to the post, she made the discovery when searched through his backpack one day.
I saw bottles of pills, one I knew to be his anxiety meds he told me he didn’t like, and two others with a name I didn’t recognize as his depression medication. A quick Google search gave me the answer. It was the treatment for the herpes virus. The dates on the pills were from last month and this month.
I felt my heart drop with what I found. Was this for cold sores and he’s making sure it doesn’t break out? Did he cheat and contract it and just found out? We no longer use protection other than my birth control so have I unknowingly contracted this? My mind whirled as I tried to justify his reasonings for not immediately telling me what was happening. It didn’t make sense to me.
When the woman’s 31-year-old fiancé–who she refers to as Steve–returned home, she confronted him. He confessed that he had been diagnosed with the virus four years ago. They’ve been together for three.
I sat there waiting for Steve to come back while fumbling with this new information. When he came back, I didn’t hesitate to ask what the pills in his backpack were for. At first, it was as I expected, he tried to tell me they were his anxiety medication. I asked about the other pills that weren’t labeled as such, and he couldn’t speak. He sat down and asked me if we could talk about this later. I continued to stare him down until I had to ask the question he didn’t seem to have the strength to say.
“Do you have herpes?”
Four years. We have known each other for close to three. He’s always had it and never told me.
When asked why he failed to tell her, Steve said that “he felt himself to be a monster and didn’t believe that anyone could truly love him if they knew the truth.”
The poster explains:
He contracted it from a childhood friend who he trusted and apparently she didn’t even know she had it when they had a one-night stand. All he wanted to feel was normal and in that mindset didn’t stop to think of the consequences of not telling me. To hide it he took the pills when I’m not around and if he had an outbreak (he said about 2-3x a year with the medication) he would just pretend he’s not in the mood to have sex, or it had happened at times when I was on my period, etc. He said he was very careful in not infecting me.
Ironically, the woman says that she would not have cared if her fiancé told her that he has herpes; however, the fact that he hid his diagnoses for so long is what has her distraught.
What hurts me the most is not that he has herpes because I wouldn’t have given a f*ck if he had something like that. That’s the world we live in. I get that. I, however, can’t wrap my head around the fact that he has been lying to me every day for this long. The pain of not being trusted combined with the lack of respect of my body and my decisions has completely damaged my outlook of Steve. He is thoughtful, caring, sweet and has always wanted to make me happy and treat me “like a princess”. But then this. His fear of rejection appeared to trump any risk of trusting me.
What also scares me the most is that he never had plans to tell me had I not confronted him. At this point, I have looked at it from his point of view, and I could see how it would be hard to tell someone such a secret, one that no one knew. We talked about couples counseling, building that trust again. I go back and forth with my feelings. So far, a lot of what I’m feeling is numb. I’m setting up a gynecologist appointment to do further testing as it seems a basic screening herpes is hard to diagnose. Not sure what to do past this point.
Just after having unprotected sex with somebody, a million thoughts run through your head. You assume the worst. You try to bargain with the devil. You tell yourself you’re being crazy. You tell yourself you were crazy to do that. Here are just some of the scary thoughts we all have after unprotected sex.
Even adults don’t know all the answers when it comes to how sexually transmitted diseases are spread. Unfortunately, a lot of people are just doing guesswork or trying to use “logic” when determining if it’s safe to do x, y, or z with somebody infected with an STD. But STD’s usually don’t care about your logic, so know the facts on how they’re spread.
Relationships can be a gamble at times. If things don’t work out, you can be left with regrets, emotional scars and even incurable sexually transmitted diseases. The ex-girlfriend of Pittsburgh Steelers lineman Camaron Thomas is claiming that she was left to deal with the latter after their romance came to a rocky conclusion. According to TMZ, the unnamed woman has filed a lawsuit against the 27-year-old pro baller, claiming that he gave her herpes.
Thomas, however, is denying the allegations. His attorneys described the plaintiff as a “bitter girl” whose lawsuit is nothing more than a desperate attempt to get back in her ex’s pockets.
“She’s angry, vindictive and mean because he has another woman, and a baby in his life,” said Miami-based attorney Adam Kenner.
According to Kenner, the woman tested negative for herpes during her relationship with Thomas. He also claims that she didn’t test positive until five months after they ceased being intimate with one another. He argues that for this reason, Thomas could not have been the person who gave her the disease. When asked if Thomas has herpes, his lawyer had this to say:
“I’m not his doctor but we’re going to get him tested as a result of this baseless accusation.”
To add even more scandal to the mix, the woman is also accusing him of domestic abuse; however, Kenner is denying that as well.
“This guy is like a gentle giant. He would never lay a hand on her.”
What a mess.
Follow Jazmine on Twitter @JazmineDenise
An Ohio mom recently filed a lawsuit againt the UC Medical Center after snapshots of her medical records were uploaded to Facebook, WLWT reports.
According to the woman’s attorney Mike Allen, the records included her diagnosis of maternal syphilis. The snapshots were shared in a group called “Team No Hoes.” A duo, who are reportedly employees at the hospital, are believed to be behind the leak.
“She was absolutely devastated. That is the most private of private medical information that was posted on Facebook and went out to a group on Facebook that had a huge dissemination,” Allen said. “For an employee of the University of Cincinnati Medical Center to post that information on a social media device that millions of people have access to, it’s above and beyond the law and that’s why we feel that they’re responsible.”
“To have that kind of information in the public domain when it is clearly legally to be protected, that’s a problem and that’s a problem that UC’s responsible for,” Allen said.
The woman is suing the medical center, her ex-boyfriend Raphael Bradley, an unnamed hospital employee believed to be a nurse and an employee named Ryan Rawls. According to the lawsuit, Bradley convinced the employees to release the woman’s medical records, which is a violation of state and federal laws. A rep from UC Medical Center told reporters that they have not yet received a copy of the lawsuit, but will look into it once they do.
“We have not received a copy of the lawsuit but we will certainly investigate it and we cannot comment on pending litigation,” said UC Medical Center spokeswoman Diana Lara.
Allen adds that his client has been crippled by this entire experience.
“She doesn’t want to go out. She doesn’t want to talk to people. People who were formerly her friends have made fun of her for it. She’s chastised in the community and all of this could’ve been avoided if UC Med Center had proper protections in place,” Allen said.
The woman is requesting more than $25,000 in damages.
Follow Jazmine on Twitter @JazmineDenise
I was 16-years-old when I had my first abortion.
I remember nervously pacing down Park Avenue in New York city, barely able to function because I was suffering from severe morning sickness and dehydration (you’re not allowed to eat or drink after 12am the night before the procedure). Outside the hidden Manhattan doctor’s office were a group of hecklers, toting signs with bloody and dismembered fetuses on it. If I had eaten in the last few hours, I would have easily thrown up. I kept walking straight past the entrance, fearful they’d peg me as a patient and attack. I made it half way down the block where I found enough courage to turn back and face the angry lobbyist. They pushed pamphlets at me and yelled things I’ve buried so deep, I couldn’t repeat if I tried. Did you know your baby has a heartbeat at 22 days? I guess that’s if you classify the fetus as such. I didn’t. I just thought of it as a bundle of cells, an embryo. In my mind it wasn’t a baby just yet even though I was somewhere around 4 months along.
Abortion is not uncommon in the United States. 3 out of 10 women in the U.S. have an abortion by the time they are 45 years old. Depending on the length of the pregnancy, a woman can either have the pregnancy surgically removed in a clinic or opt for “medical abortion,” which is the term for taking the mifepristone pill (called RU-486 when it was being developed) up to 9 weeks into their pregnancy. An in-clinic abortion costs anywhere between $300–$950 in the first trimester (women can get abortions up to 24-weeks), while the pill can be taken up to 9 weeks into the pregnancy. Prices for the pill cost $300–$800.
I recently stumbled across a meme on Instagram that called women who’ve had multiple abortions serial killers. I’ve never been offended by a post on Instagram, but on that day, I took it to heart. I’ve had five abortions in total, three surgical and two non-surgical (the pill). I never thought I would have so many. When I was just 16, there was another girl my age in the doctor’s office who had six and I looked at her like she was crazy. I judged her…then turned into her.
Read more about this personal story at HelloBeautiful.com
Today, we know enough to understand it isn’t just reckless, irresponsible, ignorant individuals who pick up STD’s—we can all be at risk sometimes, even when we take precautions. Many STD’s can still be passed even when there is a condom present, and the most evil ones show no symptoms for a long time—if ever—leaving the carrier to believe he or she is perfectly clean.
It’s very likely that in your life you’ll date, fall in love with, or even marry someone with a permanent STD like HPV or Herpes. Here’s how to navigate it so that you can increase your chances of staying STD-free, and minimize your chances of offending your partner.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), there are more than 19 million new cases of STDs in the US each year and an estimated 110 million infected citizens total (there are a little more than 316 million people living in America, so that means almost half the country is burning). One in two sexually active people contract an STD before the age of 25, with women being more likely to acquire a sexually transmitted infection than our male counterparts. Assessing stats this high can make you wonder what the heck is going on. Well, I’m not God, surely ain’t Jesus Christ or Prophet Muhammad, nor am I a super-know-it-all psychic, but I’m pretty sure people’s misinformation about STD contraction has a lot to do with it. Take a look at some of these common beliefs that, if followed, increase people’s risk of catching a disease.
Back in August popular Cameron Bay was shocked to learn that she tested positive for the HIV virus. When Bay learned of her diagnosis, she released a statement to inform the public, which ultimately led to the temporary suspension of the adult film industry. The actresses boyfriend, Rod Daily, also tested positive for the virus weeks later. Now, the couple hopes to use their unfortunate circumstances to raise awareness regarding sexually transmitted diseases and the adult film industry, the Huffington Post reports.
During a recent press conference organized by the AIDS Healthcare Foundation, Bay and Daily, along with three other current and former adult actors told reporters about the unsafe working conditions of the p*rn industry. Bay tearfully told reporters the shocking tale of her last shoot before testing positive. She revealed that her costar actually began bleeding from his p*nis and he was not wearing a condom. Bay went on to say that although the cameras stopped rolling momentarily, the actors eventually continued the scene.
“We continued to work even though he had a cut and we did not use a condom,” Bay revealed.
“There were up to 50 people in the room with us. And we were laying on top of them. And they were touching inappropriately. It all happened so fast. I didn’t realize how unsafe it was until I saw the pictures … You’re on a whole other level when you’re doing something so extreme,” Bay went on to describe her final shoot.
One performer, Patrick Stone, claimed that although he tested positive for HIV, his employer, Kink.com, knew this and asked him to perform in a shoot the very next week. The company, of course, denies these claims, insisting that they were never made aware of his positive test. Thankfully, Stone has taken two tests since his initial positive test, which have both come back negative.
“It’s been kind of a whirlwind week for me emotionally. I feel that the testing process for Performer Availability Screening Services is not working. If I was allowed to fall through the cracks like I did, who else is out there? I mean, they had me scheduled for a shoot tomorrow and as far as they knew, I was HIV-positive,” Stone said.
Daily also voiced his issues with the industry and their lack of concern for their actors.
“I just don’t know how an industry stands here and says they care so much about their performers and, a week after someone tests positive, they’re out there shooting without condoms,” Daily said. “Ultimately, it’s a business, and their main concern is money and not their performers.”
Bay also took to her Twitter page to say that she hopes her story will help someone else.
“I have said many times… if my story can help at least one person then good. Im not fighting for or against anyone other than fighting against HIV/AIDS,” the retired actress tweeted.
Watch full coverage on the press conference on the next page.
Back in 2012, during a routine screening, the adult film industry discovered that veteran actor Mr. Marcus, real name Jesse Spencer, had syphilis. He received a penicillin shot immediately. But when he was screened 11 days later he still showed signs of the disease. But instead of sitting out of the next shoot, Mr. Marcus altered the results of the second test and returned to work.
Well, earlier today Spencer, who plead no contest to the charges, was sentenced to 30 days in jail. He was also ordered to perform 15 days of community service and serve three years probation.
Spencer is also jailed with a $200,000 bail for an unrelated drunk driving case.
Mr. Marcus, 42, claimed that when he went back to work and took part in two shoots, he thought he was no longer infectious. A producer found the altered test results and told the two actresses he worked with and they called the police.
Spencer wasn’t the only actor who tested positive for syphilis last summer. In fact he was one of nearly a dozen. The outbreak lead the adult film industry to implement a filming hiatus and established a new condom law.
30 days, community service and probation seems like a light sentence for knowingly endangering people’s lives but who are we to judge.
What do you think of this story and the ruling?