All Articles Tagged "RHOA"

Can You Be In A Relationship With Someone And Not Be Physically Attracted To Their Body?

November 16th, 2015 - By Nneka Samuel
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Image Source: WENN

Is there an expiration date on physical attraction?  Say you’re in a loving, committed relationship and one day you wake up and, poof, the physical attraction you felt for your partner, that “clean up on aisle three!” good good, has all but vanished into thin air.  Granted, looks change and our bodies age over time as God intended them to (not that aging makes you less physically attractive), but what if you and your beloved have only been in this forever thing for a hot second?  I mean, come on.  Where is the love?

Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Cynthia Bailey, who has been married to husband Peter Thomas for five years, recently admitted that she is no longer attracted to him…when his clothes are off.  But the attraction still runs deep when it comes to his non-physical bits, like his brain and what not.  How does that work, exactly?  More importantly, can you sustain a long-term relationship if you’re not physically attracted to your partner?

I get that attraction, in all of its forms, is a very complicated thing. There are clearly levels and layers and tunnels and whatever the heck else to it.  I also know that if a dude eff’s around on you, he can start to look ugly real quick.  And Thomas was allegedly caught on camera caressing on another woman.  So maybe all of this is Bailey’s way of trying to get back at him publicly?  Or maybe it’s a ploy for ratings?  Who knows.

But for me, a lack of physical attraction, even if I’m attracted to a man intellectually, spiritually, etc., makes for a precarious situation.  There is legitimately a problem if I no longer want to see you naked.  Because sex, which is a crucial part of a romantic relationship, then becomes a chore.  A thing I’m doing for him to make him happy, as opposed to a joyous, fulfilling, intimate expression of our mutual love and affection; something we can and should both enjoy.  So if I don’t want to see you naked because the sight of you does nothing for me, what do I do when it’s time to turn the lights down low? Put a paper bag over dude’s head?  Blindfold myself so I don’t have to see any parts of his nakedness?  (And does the nakedness include his face or just the rest of his body?)  What if we stop having sex altogether?  A sex-less relationship can cause all sorts of problems.

Now, say you’re on the receiving end of this.  Your partner tells you, “I’m no longer physically attracted to you.” Their reasons?  You put on too much weight, or you lost too much weight.  You’re this, that and the other.  But, hey, they’re still in this, so they want to keep on going like nothing happened.  If you love this person deeply, would you do everything in your power to get back in his good graces, so to speak?  To render yourself more physically attractive, whatever that entails?  (And what about his behind?  He’s probably no perfect 10 himself.)  But if the heat gets turned up and suddenly there’s an ultimatum – do this or else I’m leaving – do you try to work it out because you’ve committed yourself to him?  Because of the children?  Because you’re afraid to go back out there and start over? Because you’re fraid of being alone?  Moreover, what’s to keep you from finding someone who does find you attractive, physically and every other kind of way you want and deserve to be loved?  Though the saying is cliché, there are definitely other fish in the sea.

It’s hard to say how I would really feel or react if faced with this situation.   Maybe if everything else in the relationship is rock solid, an attraction-less marriage is feasible. But ideal?  Hardly. At least not for me.  And who wants to settle for feasible?  I’m not saying that physical attraction is everything in a relationship or that it weighs more heavily than other forms of attraction.  I’m just intrigued by the fact that Bailey has made this claim about her husband only five years into her marriage.  Perhaps some couples who have been together long enough are in another realm where physical attraction is no longer relevant.  There’s respect, there’s admiration, there’s deep understanding and love. Therefore, the physical doesn’t enter into that equation–or is a very tiny fraction of it.  And if that’s what Cynthia Bailey and Peter Thomas have, more power to ‘em.

Less Peter, More Everything Else: How To Get People Watching Real Housewives Of Atlanta Again

November 13th, 2015 - By Meg Butler
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Apparently, with NeNe Leakes gone, Real Housewives of Atlanta is seeing its first ratings dip in a long time. Luckily, we’ve got a few ideas on how to help spice things up on everyone’s favorite installment in the Real Housewives franchise.

RHOA Experiences Ratings Dip For Season 8 Premiere

November 12th, 2015 - By Jazmine Denise Rogers
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When NeNe Leakes first announced that she would not be returning to “Real Housewives of Atlanta,” many wondered if the remaining cast member would be able to hold down the series on their own. Leakes, who was the last standing original housewife, maintained a crucial role in the series’ storylines for years.

Season 8 of the series premiered Sunday, and it appears that network executives felt Leakes’ absence in more ways than one. According to OK! magazine, the premiere drew 1 million fewer viewers than the season has in previous years. The seventh season’s premiere attracted 3.8 million viewers while this weekend’s premiere only garnered 2.968 million.

Still, the series ranked number 3 out of all of the other shows on television that evening, which is really not too shabby if you ask us. Hopefully, there will be a turnaround for this season and ratings will begin to climb again.

Did you tune into the premiere on Sunday? What were your thoughts?

“Are We Grown A** Women Talking Like This?” Watch The RHOA Season 8 Trailer

September 28th, 2015 - By Veronica Wells
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RHOA season 8 trailer

Source: Bravo

Y’all we got it so wrong. It looks like actress Kim Fields will be joining the cast of “Real Housewives of Atlanta.” Hopefully, she won’t get sucked into the madness and mayhem and will serve as a voice of reason for some of her cast members. But we all know that’s easier said than done when it comes to the stunts and shenanigans these ladies like to pull.

You never know.

But if the season 8 trailer is any indication, it looks like Fields might be bringing some truth they all need to hear. In one scene she asks, “Are we grown ass women talking like this?” Perhaps she wasn’t entirely familiar with the show before she signed on. If all they’re doing is talking, they’re in a good place.

Fields isn’t the only new, yet familiar face. Sheree is back talking about that same chateau. Porsha’s there throwing shade and talking about her desire to get pregnant. Meanwhile Kandi is making sure everything is good with her baby and trying to determine who’s going to be a nanny to the new bundle. Todd jokingly mentioned Mama Joyce’s name.

Interestingly enough, Kandi and Phaedra seem to be working on mending their friendship.

Kenya proudly declares that she’s going to start dating like a man.

We get to watch as Cynthia confronts Peter about being all up on that woman in the club and then seems to suffer some type of health issue.

There’s plenty to see and discuss.

Check out the trailer in the video below.

Is It A Good Idea For Dr. Umar Johnson To Appear On An Upcoming Episode Of RHOA?

August 18th, 2015 - By Charing Ball
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Well, it appears that Dr. Umar Johnson is looking to turn in his title as Black America’s favorite “Prince of Pan-Africanism” for a Georgia peach.

What I am talking about is an announcement posted a few days ago on the good doctor’s Twitter, Facebook and Instagram pages suggesting that we could see him on an upcoming episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta. To be more specific, the announcement, which is attached to a picture of the RHOA cast members reads as follows:

“Breaking News!! Dr.Umar Johnson, Black America’s #1 School Psychologist, invited to appear as special guest PsychoTherapist on an episode of “The Real HouseWives of Atlanta!” Date Coming Soon….”

Although the producers of RHOA have yet to confirm his appearance and Dr. Johnson’s message does only say that he’s been “invited,” it sounds like some commitment has already been made as noted by the part of the message that reads “Date Coming Soon….”

Needless to say, this possible appearance has raised eyebrows from both outside and within Dr. Johnson’s part of the conscious Black community. In particular, some on his Facebook page are wondering why Dr. Johnson would risk going – or even want to go – on a show, which they believe not only degrades Black people, but has the potential to make him (and by default, the conscious community) look foolish.

And they do have a reason to worry. If you’ll recall, “Dr.” Tiy-E Muhammad, the self-proclaimed relationship expert, and certified psychologist, ended up looking foolish as all hell after appearing on a couple of RHOA episodes. He played the role of Sheree Whitfield’s boyfriend. But it came to light that the “The Love Doctor” was not a certified psychologist. In fact, he had only attended a couple of semesters at Southern Illinois University.

Some critics are also calling Dr. Johnson’s possible appearance hypocritical considering that has been known to rail against the alleged destructive propaganda of not only mainstream television, but also of Black women with weaves and blond hair. Of course, Dr. Johnson has some supporters. Particularly those who feel that this exposure will not only give him an opportunity to “free some minds,” but open wallets for his proposed Marcus Garvey RBG International Leadership Academy for Black Boys. It should be noted that Dr. Johnson would not be the first public intellectual to use mainstream channels to help reach broader audiences. Not only has famed intellectual and activist Dr. Cornel West cut a rap album, but he also appeared in the sequels to the cult classic Matrix trilogy.

Personally, as a fan of both reality television and Black women with weaves, I want to see this to happen. But only for meme’s sake. Still, it is hard to see how dishing tea with the ladies would be the right move for Dr. Johnson, who only a couple of months ago was involved in a very salacious public sex scandal with Khym Ringgold, aka, the Conscious Stripper, after he erroneously claimed that he was celibate.

And again, a fan of reality television, I do realize that much of it is scripted and heavily edited. With that in mind, I also fail to see how any of this would help to repair his image, let alone empower the global African community. And I definitely don’t see this changing the minds of those, even among his flock, who still have questions about how well his personal character matches up with his public persona. If anything, it would likely provide more ammunition to those who feel that the good doctor is using the Black conscious community to promote his personal ambitions.

Moreover, I think his possible appearance is another example of how misogyny, particularly against Black women, is often normalized in our community. In spite of all of his personal contradictions and regressive gender and sexual philosophies, Dr. Johnson still continues to enjoy great success on talk circuits. Not just within the conscious community, but among more mainstream Black institutions as well. This includes guest hosting on a few of Roland Martin’s radio shows and being an on-air guest on Martin’s news show, which airs on TV One.

His appearance also says something about how our oppression as Black women and the Black LGBTQ community continues to be normalized even within more mainstream (i.e., White) channels. I just find it a slap in the face that Bravo and Andy Cohen, who produce the Real Housewives series, would even extend an invitation to a man who once said that single mothers “psychologically castrate” boys and turn them gay. This is especially confusing for a show geared mostly towards the Black LGBTQ community and Black women in general.

The irony in all of this is that Dr. Johnson, as well as many of his followers, love to call any Black who doesn’t get step-toe in line with misogyny and homophobia “brainwashed followers of white women feminism.” Yet those same people have no qualms about accepting checks from gay White men. If the same act would make us “negro bed wenches,” what does that make them? But that is just me pointing out some things…

What do you think? Can a so-called Black conscious brother lead a flock away from the destructive gains of White supremacy while also standing knee-deep in it?

Not Happening: Looks Like Kim Fields Won’t Be Appearing On RHOA

August 11th, 2015 - By Veronica Wells
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Jody Cortes/WENN

Jody Cortes/WENN

You may remember earlier this year we reported that Kim Fields would be joining the cast of “Real Housewives of Atlanta.” And though that might have been the case at one point, sources claim that that’s no longer happening.

According to Straight From The A, Fields was indeed considered for the show and even taped several episodes with cast members over the past month. But allegedly she was “too dry” in every scene. Which is not too much of a surprise. From what we know of Fields’, she’s always been a class act and she wanted to maintain her reputation on one of the most drama-filled reality shows around.

Good for her.

So, while it would be great to see her on television, on a more consistent basis, it won’t be on RHOA.

Is this good news or nah?

Drew Sidora WILL NOT Be Joining The RHOA

June 27th, 2015 - By Courtney Whitaker
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Nikki Nelson / WENN

Nikki Nelson / WENN

Last week, we reported Claudia Jordan apparently received the axe from Real Housewives of Atlanta. Now, we have some new information for you.

Singer and actress Drew Sidora will not be joining RHOA after all. The Jasmine Brand reports,

Drew Sidora will indeed be busy this Fall! Following the birth of her second child, Drew will return to TV in a new series, as well as co-star in “The Choir Director” and “The Preacher’s Son,” the highly anticipated film adaptations of Carl Weber’s “New York Times Best-Selling” books. Drew is also on deadline to complete her forthcoming cookbook and planning the annual Girl Summit for her DreamMakers charity. She has truly embraced and loves being a working mom. Contrary to published reports, “RHOA” producers did not “test” Drew’s “Housewife” qualifications for the upcoming season; however, we can confirm that she excels daily as both wife and mother.

Well, there you have it folks. Drew will be busy living her life as an actress and mom. Go Drew!

Should You Take Children To See Their Parent In Prison?

June 22nd, 2015 - By Veronica Wells
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Take Children To See Their Parent In Prison feat

Apollo Nida had a very lonely Father’s Day.

According to TMZ, Phaedra Parks did not bring the estranged couple’s two sons to see their father this past weekend.

Sources told TMZ that Parks is taking advice from psychologists who have said it wouldn’t be good for her four-year-old son Ayden or her one-year-old son Dylan to see their father locked up because they’re so young.

Though the boys couldn’t be there in person, they sent Apollo cards with pictures of what they’d been doing recently.

Phaedra also hasn’t visted Nida, though a source claims that she puts money on his books so he can makes purchases at commissary.

Nida is currently serving an eight-year prison sentence for stolen checks and money laundering.

This story breaks my heart. Of course it is Apollo’s consistently poor decisions that have separated him from his family; still, being kept away from his children just seems like adding insult to injury. While I understand that seeing a parent in jail might be a traumatic experience for a child, the alternative of not seeing your father during your crucial, developmental years, is also unhealthy.

I wonder how long does Phaedra plan to keep the three away from one another.

Though this is certainly not a position any wife and mother would ever want to find herself in, I think there are some advantages to Phaedra and Apollo’s sons being too young to fully comprehend what’s going on in their family. I’m sure traveling to prison can be a dark and depressing experience for someone who fully understands their loved one’s loss of freedom. But a four-year-old and certainly a one-year-old don’t have that same type of awareness. Perhaps they’ll just appreciate the chance to touch and see their father.

While I’m sure leaving is painful and unpleasant, having to tell Ayden over and over again that he can’t see his father and having Dylan know his father only through pictures around the house really isn’t much better.

This is no shade to Phaedra because I really can’t even imagine what this might feel like. Still, I’d like to think in a similar situation I wouldn’t deprive my children any more than they have to be in this unfortunate situation.

What do you think about Phaedra’s decision to keep her boys away from Apollo to prevent psychological damage? Is this the decision you would make if placed in a similar predicament?

Did Y’all See? RHOA And LHHNY Stars Caught In Compromising Positions

June 19th, 2015 - By Brande Victorian
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This week the ladies discuss RHOA and LHHNY drama. Did Y'all See Cynthia Bailey's husband Peter Thomas caught on video with another woman and Juelz Santana's girlfriend Kimbella's questionable mother-daughter swimsuits? Watch as we discuss all that and more in the video above.

Is That You?! 9 Popular Music Videos We Didn’t Realize Claudia Jordan Was The Star Of

May 20th, 2015 - By Victoria Uwumarogie
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Claudia Jordan

While Claudia Jordan can’t seem to find the right man in real life on Real Housewives of Atlanta she stayed arm-in-arm with a good looking guy during her days as a video model. After noticing Jordan in a throwback video on my favorite channel, VH1 Soul, I did some digging and realized she’s been in quite a few visual clips since the early ’90s, and you probably never noticed. Here are just a few of her big appearances from kicking it with The Backstreet Boys to mixing and mingling with Joe and Dru Hill.