All Articles Tagged "relationship addict"
“All you need is love”? Sorry Beatles but, you need much more. If you put every last drop of energy you had into your romantic relationship, that relationship itself would crumble because you’d wake up one day realizing you were miserable because you had no friends, no career and no identity of your own. Here are signs you’re on your path to that scary epiphany.
You have to be generous to have real love in your life. You need to be willing to change and compromise from time to time, but, it’s too easy (especially for women) to be the only one changing, compromising and giving for the relationship. It worse if you change so often and so much that you start to not realize it. And if you’re constantly in that type of relationship, you may have codependent tendencies. Here are some common signs of codependency:
You never try to disagree
A major trait of a codependent person is a strong desire to avoid conflict, at all costs. You may think it’s no big deal when your partner says one little thing that you don’t agree with, but you swallow your words so as to avoid conflict. But, swallow your words enough and you’ve got a partner who thinks you agree with him on everything, and you’re not being yourself, all for the sake of being with somebody. It’s all right to have an opinion…and a backbone.
It sounds like such a harmless, even charming term: a hopeless romantic. But, ruminating all day on love, on a man, on images of a relationship can be destructive and, unfortunately, humiliating. And that’s what you’ll be if you over prioritize men and love.
It’s a tricky thing: integrity in love. Love is certainly not black and white. As we get older, we learn what we do and don’t want in a partner. Sometimes, we learn it while in the relationship. You can’t help who you fall in love with, and you can’t help when you meet that person. Sometimes timing is just not right.
We all know stories of two people meeting, taking each other from their current relationships, getting married and living happily ever after. It happens. But, should it? If you’re considering leaving your current man for another, consider your reasons for doing so or you may just end up feeling massively guilty, and no happier than you were with the last guy…
Think on this before you do…
Why doesn’t she just leave him?? We’ve all wondered this about a friend at some point. Perhaps our friends have wondered it about us. But, a woman’s mind can be a complicated thing. And her apprehensions and thoughts about what life will be like without this man can feel as large and as real as an actual wall keeping her from exiting the relationship.
Here’s why we often stay in bad relationships…
No one wants to be alone forever, but a stable, self-confident person doesn’t actually think “oh my GOD I’m going to be alone forever” just because they are alone for a couple of months. Only a true relationship addict goes into panic mode the moment they are unattached—that’s where the addiction comes from. You know you’re an addict if you do this:
Most relationship articles are geared towards getting more out of your man. Getting him to ask you more about your life—your family, your work, your day. Getting him to talk to you about his feelings. Getting him to be more generous in bed. You know all the signs that tell that a man still needs to learn to open up—to learn how to fuse his life with somebody else’s. But sometimes, the problem is of the opposite nature. Some guys only know how to fuse their life with somebody else’s. Some men need a woman in their life every second. Maybe that sounds sort of nice. Sort of. But honestly…you’ll be seeking just as much advice on how to un-cling this guy from your arm, as you were on how to get more attention from the guy who barely scheduled you into his day. Here’s how you know if you’ve bagged (or been bagged by) a needy one.