All Articles Tagged "reality tv"

Are We Selling Sex Or Is Sex Selling Black Women?

October 31st, 2014 - By TaMara Griffin
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Selling Sex

Source: WENN

With all the buzz that was surrounding Nicki Minaj’s video “Anaconda,” I have to wonder as a Black women is this all we want for ourselves? Is this really a representation of Black women and our sexuality? Why must we continuously be the focus of hypersexualized videos in order to be relevant? Why must we allow ourselves to continue to be exploited like Mimi Faust and her infamous sex tape? Is this five minutes of fame worth our selling our souls and destroying our people? What statement does this send to our young girls who watch videos and reality TV shows and think that this is a way of life?

While many women are empowered enough to realize that this buffoonery is a form of “entertainment,” many women are not able to make that connection. Unfortunately as a result, many women and young girls end up modeling their lives after these reckless, negligent and thoughtless images. These images don’t represent nor promote sex positivity nor do they denote owning and embracing one’s sexuality. In fact, it’s just the opposite. These images actually represent a conflict of values, morals, and a lack of self esteem
and self-efficacy that contributes to putting oneself at risks for mental health issues, interpersonal violence, substance abuse, HIV and other sexually transmitted infections, etc.

Black women’s sexuality is already stereotyped, stigmatized, taboo and bogged down by layers of negative intergenerational patterns and ideologies that have been passed down from slavery. These ideologies were used to validate the inhumane sexual treatment of enslaved women. They were also used to imply that Black women were despicable and inferior. Unfortunately, these ideologies are still present. Today, the media uses these images in music videos, movies, television shows, and other forms of entertainment to continue to brainwash people into believing the negative stereotypes of Black women.

The prevailing images of Black women in the media include jezebels, baby-mamas, video vixens, chicken heads, gold diggers, angry Black women, and hoes. These images and ideologies, with their highly sexual undertones, helps to influence the way in which Black women view themselves. The more Black women see images of themselves getting famous for fitting into one of the aforementioned categories, the more likely they feel inclined to model what they see. In addition, these images helps to influence the way others value and interact with Black women.

While rappers, actors, entertainers and “reality” TV stars may not have signed up to become role models, they are! Once they step into the spotlight, they become a model for what is considered to be trendy and acceptable. These “celebrities” in many ways, good or bad, set the standard. But what standard are they setting and at what cost to Black women?

Unfortunately, Black women have become desensitized to seeing themselves portrayed negatively. While there aren’t any signs of these unhealthy images disappearing any time soon, there is definitely a need to counteract them in the media. We are in need of a cultural shift in sexuality, one that restores the dignity of Black women. It is time for Black women to reclaim our sexual images in society. We must ask ourselves the following questions: 1)Do we care about the type of women our girls grow up to become, 2) Is their public image worth defending, and 3) Is their sexual integrity worth protecting?

No longer can we sit in silence or stand idly on the sidelines while the images of Black women continue to be destroyed in the media. However, in order to change the trajectory, we need to begin with restoring Black women’s sense of value, worth and sexuality. We need to transform from the “ex’s,” “jezebel,” “angry Black woman,” “video vixen,” “gold digger,” “baby mama,” “chicken heads,” and “‘hoes” to self-respecting women, wives, mothers and leaders in our community. Once we do, we will be able to see a shift in our society that will begin to embrace and celebrate the true authentic essence of Black women’s sexuality.
Dr. TaMara G10517587_10152337526693315_3514000000734284521_nriffin loves nothing more than talking about sex! At the age of 13, she told her mother she wanted to be a Sex Therapist! Her passion is deeply rooted in spreading messages about healthy sexuality. Dr. TaMara is a sexologist, sex therapist, educator and motivational speaker with more than 20 years of experience speaking, writing and teaching about sexuality. She travels the country helping individuals embrace and honor their sexuality. Dr. TaMara has published numerous books and articles. She is the owner of L.I.F.E. by Dr. TaMara Griffin, Live Inspired Feel Empowered LLC-L.I.F.E. She is also the Director of Project Create S.A.F.E. {Sexual Assault Free Environments}

So Vaughn Is Mad He Won’t Be On The “Married At First Sight” Spinoff

October 1st, 2014 - By Veronica Wells
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“Married At First Sight” was a hit! And we loved it and learned quite a bit about attraction, commitment and it was absolutely fascinating to watch. So it comes as no surprise that the couples are getting a spin off.

The New York Post reported that FYI ordered a follow up show called “Married at First Sight: The First Year” which will follow the couples who decided to stay married.

But it’s only for the couples that stayed together.

Duh, right?

And yet Vaughn seemed to have an issue with the fact that he and Monet weren’t invited to participate in the spin-off.

Here’s what he posted on his Instagram account.

Nothing against the other couples but people keep asking why @monetbell and I aren’t on the spinoff. If y’all feel some type of way about that feel free to let@FYI and @officialmarriedatfirstsight know

Umm… apparently, Vaughn doesn’t seem to understand that the show “MARRIED at First Sight” ended when he and Monet decided not to to stay married. So no, y’all might get a nice montage or vignette about your self improvements and new boos but not a whole spin-off. I will admit that Vaughn and Monet were entertaining to watch but that was because people were so invested, anxious to see if they could make their marriage work, despite their terrible, horrible, no good, very bad communication. And now that we know the two are getting a divorce… well, the thrill is gone.

In the words of Willy Wonka…

What do you think, would you want to see Vaughn and Monet on the “Married at First Sight” spinoff?

Where Are They Now: The Cast Of College Hill Part 2

September 30th, 2014 - By Kendra Koger
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Let me just say:  WOW!  I’ve been doing these “Where Are They Now”s for a minute, and I wasn’t expecting the reaction from the first part of  the”College Hill” article.  But when I asked:  “Tell me which ones you wanted to see for part 2 in the comment section,” you all did not fail to deliver.

So, my gift to you, is the second part, including Virginia State University cast, South Beach cast, and Atlanta cast.  Now if I included everyone that you all asked for, this article would be 19 pages and I know how you all feel about the multiple pages.  So, I’m going to focus on the most requested, and the ones that I could find the most information on.

I hope I make you all happy, let’s get it started with:

Everything Ain’t For Everybody: Celebrities Ruined By Reality TV

September 18th, 2014 - By Meg Butler
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These celebrities thought their reality shows were going to be their ticket to stardom or at least a career revival. But this time the exposure didn’t work in their favor. Is reality TV really a career killer? Or should we wait for these Hollywood hopefuls to bounce back?

Karlie Redd

Love and Hip Hop star Karlie Redd thought that her stint on reality TV would open industry doors. But when she went to audition for a Tyler Perry movie, they told her that no reality stars need apply. And Karlie Redd says it’s not the first time that this has happened:

“There’s been roles that I auditioned for and then they found out…literally I’m on my way to set to work, got the role and everything and then they find out I’m on the show and then they’re like, ‘Uh, no.’”

Celebs Who Broke Into The Industry After Reality Tv

September 12th, 2014 - By Kendra Koger
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Derrick Salters/

Derrick Salters/


For many people, when they first get on reality television, it’s because they feel as though they have some talent, but haven’t been discovered yet.  It’s a way to make yourself be seen by the right people.  But, too many of those people forget their reasons for getting on their chosen shows in the first place, and find themselves stuck to the allure of infamy, because it’s easier.

However, there are some people who the entertainment industry took notice of, and didn’t hold (some of) their ridiculous behavior against them.  There are also people who focused on their talent, and kept a cool head in manufactured drama.

So, here’s to these participants of reality television who the entertainment industry looked beyond the reality shows that they were on, and gave them a chance regardless.

Kelsey Grammer Producing Christina Milian Reality Show?

September 10th, 2014 - By Brande Victorian
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 Christina Milian Reality Show

Source: WENN

Lil Tunechi must have some serious connections.

Even though it’s clear just about anyone can land a reality show these days, not everyone manages to have famed actor/producer Kelsey Grammer produce one about them. And that’s what makes this news about Christina Milian’s new reality show all the more confusing.

When I first heard the news I assumed it was a rumor, but low and behold E! Programming and Development Executive Vice President Jeff Olde confirmed Kelsey Grammer is on board to executive produce a show on their network following Christina’s life. According to Entertainment Weekly, he said in a statement:

“We simply adore Christina. She’s young, vibrant and a highly accomplished artist who has a hectic life balancing the glitz and glamour of celebrity, and the rough and tumble world of hip-hop, with the more relatable moments of being a mom, newly back on the dating scene, and trying to make things better for her family.”

Should I throw the shade or let y’all?

The reality series, oddly titled “Christina Milian Turned Up,” is set to premiere in 2015 which makes me wonder whether all this cuddling up to Weezy is a real romance or just a PR move to get people interested in the “glitz and glamour” of her celebrity. Guess only time will tell. Will you be checking for this show?

Where Are They Now: Cast Members Of “College Hill” Part 1

September 8th, 2014 - By Kendra Koger
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College Hill – BET from Melvin James Filmworks on Vimeo.

“College Hill” first came on the scene in 2004.  It’s agenda was to show a primarily African American cast in the confines of different HBCUs as they pursued their education, while also sifting through personal drama.

Since the show ran for six seasons, trying to narrow down the list was a task.  So, I broke it up into two parts.  However, if I didn’t include your favorite (or the one you wanted to know the most about), add their name in the comment section, and I’ll add them on the next go ’round!

Also, let me know who you want to see from South Beach and on!

“People Make Mistakes” Monyetta Shaw Talks Forgiving Ne-Yo And Hoping Fans Do The Same

September 8th, 2014 - By Veronica Wells
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Source: Vh1

Source: Vh1

One of our favorite cast members on VH1’s hit show, “Atlanta Exes” is Monyetta Shaw. She just seems so down to earth and sweet. And while she has every reason in the world to be bitter, she doesn’t speak ill of the father of her children, singer and producer Ne-Yo.

But she didn’t have to be catty or messy to show the world that Ne-Yo is not always the gentleman he presents to the public. And the fans of the show have discovered this listening to Monyetta talk about how he did her when he decided, after proposing, that he no longer wanted to be with her.

But the final nail in Ne-Yo’s coffin came when Monyetta revealed that she decided, because she thought her family with Ne-Yo was complete with a boy and girl, that she would have her tubes burnt off.

Of course, she’s already gone through the procedure when he called off their engagement, breaking up with her over the phone.

With all of that information, there’s no way he could look like the good guy. But Monyetta, in an interview with Juicy says that she’s managed to forgive Ne-Yo and how she would want viewers to do the same.

“I will say it’s a bit different for him. I don’t think he’s ever been seen in that light before, and no one knew that would happen. I just knew I wouldn’t bash him because that’s not the relationship that we have. But then again, I knew that I was going to tell my truth to be able to help others that maybe experiencing what I experienced. Kinda show them what maybe not to do, so none of us saw this coming, and it’s a different light for him.

But what I want to convey to the world is to let them know that I’ve forgiven him. Yes, people grow, people change, people make mistakes, but I was mature enough to forgive him, so I kinda want the fans to forgive him too. But I get it – they’re probably shocked ’cause his image is a gentleman, and they really didn’t know much about our personal life because we purposely kept it on the low, but of course, I signed up for a reality show, so that’s kinda out of the window. It’s weird for him, but he’s still supportive though, I will say that. He’s still totally supportive, but it’s weird because of all the backlash. And I guess, I don’t know, the fans are kinda like, ‘Oh, that’s not a good thing. Why would he do that?’ I guess just seeing me for the first time, the fans are taking a liking to me, thank God. I’m just being me, and I’m just very grateful they like me, and that even more it kinda makes them go hard like, ‘What are you doing? Mo is this, Mo is that. How dare you.’ But people change, and I’ve forgiven him, and I’m able to have a good relationship with him. So hopefully, they’ll see that, and they’ll see we still support one another and that he’s not really a bad guy. Sometimes people make bad decisions and choices, and that’s just life.”

She also addressed her decision to have her tubes burned.

“LIfe. You live your life the way that you see is necessary. I believed in the promise that was going to be – that we were getting.There was no doubt in my mind. If there was one inkling of a doubt, I would’ve never, ever, ever done it. Ever in life. But I was secure in what we had, and I did it. We decided as a family. And let’s be clear because a lot of stories were coming out saying he made me, and he pressured me. That’s not the case, at all. I’m a woman, a grown woman, and I made my own choice. Yes, we decided together, ’cause we had a girl and a boy, that we didn’t want anymore kids. You know, we were a family, and this was it for us. So yeah, that’s what I would have to say to that. I don’t know if I would do it the exact same way if I had the opportunity to go back, but that’s life, and we can’t go back. So I’m standing by my decision, and living with the consequences.”

Then she talked about dating and how she would manage it, with Ne-Yo still living in their home.

“Just the way that I’m built, I wouldn’t bring a guy in the house because it is the house that we share together. It is our family house as long as he still resides here. I’m just not built like that – that’s not even a question. I wouldn’t do it, so he would have to be out of the house. He has nothing to worry about in that regards.”

“He seems to be supportive of me moving on. We’ve had discussions about it before, and his concern is my concern with him moving on. Just if it gets serious enough, make sure that person is amazing. And we would have to meet the other person if it gets to that point because they are going to be around our children, and our children are very impressionable and very young. So you know how some people bring people in and out of their kids’ lives – that’s not an option for us. You know, he’s voiced his opinion, and said he will be really supportive, but we have to be some good judge of characters.”

And since some people are convinced that these exes don’t have any claim to fame aside from their relationships, Monyetta told Juicy that she is working on her second children’s book Maddie Goes to School based on her three year old daughter Madilyn. She’s also launching an online boutique called Emerlyn & Ester– a boutique she opened with ex Ne-Yo. She co-created “Heels of Greatness,” and award ceremony that recognizes 25 trailblazing women. And Monyetta also continues her philanthropy in Swaziland.

Good luck with the fans coming around Monyetta. We all know what it’s like to have a friend tell us all the dirt about a man only to see her go back to him or swear he’s “not that bad.” The thing is though, while your girl gets to see the good and bad sides of him and most likely loves him, the outsiders just know all of the hurt he caused you. And that’s hard to forget.

“That’s Not The Guy I Knew”: Singer Olivia Says Reality TV Changed Rich Dollaz For The Worst

September 3rd, 2014 - By Victoria Uwumarogie
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Source: WENN

Source: WENN

When singer Olivia, the former first lady of G-Unit, joined the original installment of Love and Hip Hop in New York in 2011, she was joined by her manager and good friend Rich Dollaz. He supported her career when other people weren’t feeling it and was even crying over the state of it in one scene from season two (“I put my life on hold so you can win! I just want you to win!”). But as the show went on, she focused on trying to build her career while he made the poor choice to work with and sleep with Erica Mena. Eventually, these two drifted apart and instead of doing so peacefully, things got ugly. Just last month Rich threw some subliminal shade the singer’s way:

“Looking 4 n excuse why u don’t succeed when the answer is right there it’s U ur wack u have no personality nobody f-ck with u rip ya career.”

Well, in a chat with The Breakfast Club to promote her new book, Release Me: My Life, My Words, Olivia spoke on falling out with her former friend and manager. She also randomly revealed that she dated “It Wasn’t Me” singer, Shaggy, for THREE years, but that he cheated on her. She also said that she and 50 Cent almost made something happen back in the day. Here are the details:

Years Dating Shaggy

“That was my man for like three years. That was the first older dude. You got to try one. But he was a cheater.

He never had a password on his phone. You know old ni**as, they don’t know no better. So something told me to check it. I had a gut feeling one day when he was in the shower and I was like, ‘let me just look on the counter real quick.’

I just left. He came out the shower and was looking for me, he came out the crib and was banging on my door. I wouldn’t f**k with him.”

Her Time On “LHHNY”

“It was another stepping stone. I’m not mad I did the show, I’m just a little upset at what it turned into.”

If Doing Reality TV Hurt Her Career More Than Helped It

“No, it didn’t. “December” came out on the show, it was #1 of course. Then “Walk Away” came out, #1 again. Then I took the song from ol’ girl [Erica Mena], that went #1 too, so that didn’t change nothing. They miss me in the music. I’m still doing the music. But they didn’t take me seriously because of your boy [Rich Dollaz], that had nothing to do with me.”

How Rich Dollaz Changed After Getting On The Show

“That’s not the guy that I knew. We were super cool. When I tell you that was like my brother…so to see certain things transpire and just to see him act a fool or want to do things for the ratings or want to be around certain people for the ratings, it rubbed me the wrong way. I was like, ‘if this is what you want to do, then you go do that by yourself. I don’t want to be a part of it.’ It’s unfortunate. You can’t get mad if we out and they want my picture and not yours. They don’t know you. You’re the manager! I never understood that.”

Crushing  On 50 Cent While In G-Unit

Yeah, he was cute. We was having a conversation just saying you know, ‘I’m attracted to you.’  Okay, ‘well I’m attracted to you too, but we can’t do nothing cause it’s going to mess up everything.’ So we left it there.

You can check out Olivia’s chat with The Breakfast Club below. Do you think reality TV changed Rich Dollaz and hurt her career?


“There Is Life Beyond Your Mistakes.” Deitrick Haddon Talks About The Second Chance God Gave Him

September 2nd, 2014 - By Veronica Wells
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'Preachers of LA' To Return For A Second Season

Source: Instagram

“Preachers of L.A.” is such an interesting show. With strong personalities and questions about whether or not these men are representing God properly on the show, the show is either loved or hated by viewers. Each of the men is quite interesting and while we know no one is perfect, Deitrick Haddon’s past has a bit of dirt on it.

You know the story. There’s a discrepancy about whether or not he cheated on his first wife but he does have children who were born out of wedlock.

But Haddon said as a former preacher’s kid, he’s not trying to live up to anyone’s expectations anymore.

He told Centric, “I’m solid. I’m sure about myself. I don’t need validation from people. I’ve got God. I’ve got my focus. I’ve got my babies, my wife, and I’m good.”

Haddon has never been shy about his shortcomings and exposed all of this on season 1 of the show.

But it wasn’t without a purpose.

Haddon said, “I hope that my story can help people know there is life beyond your mistakes. We all mess up at some point. You can’t expect to live 80 years or 90 years or 70 years on the palest and you don’t make a mistake. That’s not even realistic. You’re going to make a mistake. You’re going to mess up real bad. Keep moving… Learn from your mistakes. It’s not how you fall; it’s how you get up.”

Now that Deitrick has gotten up, he has a new perspective on life.

“I feel like God has given me a second chance at marriage, at life and at ministry. So, now I’m determined to do it my way…Do it God’s way, but do it with my style. I’m doing it God’s way, but with Deitrick Haddon’s style.”


I guess the question is does the broadcasting of such mistakes make people understand God’s forgiveness or does it affirm the belief that ‘church folk” are no better than people “in the world”? I guess it’s a matter of perspective.

Take a look at a couple of clips from the interview below and let us know what you think about Deitrick’s comments.

No thanks