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Every woman dreams of having a ring on her finger, right?! Long-term relationships are typically the pathway to marriage and beyond. However, not all men have marriage on their mind, at least not without some pushing and prodding. Here are 14 signs that your boyfriend isn’t planning to propose to you anytime soon.

Source: WENN

From EurWeb

Jason Derulo, who has been dating singer Jordin Sparks for 18 months, says he’s currently in the planning stages of his marriage proposal.

”The proposal will be monumental,” he told In Touch Weekly. “I wrote a song called ‘Marry Me.’ I have a date in mind. I want to surprise her but she’s given me guidelines first. I have to ask her dad for permission.”

Jordin has been very open about her relationship with Jason and has admitted she would love to settle down with him and start a family.

Read more on EurWeb.com.

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From Essence

I have been with my boyfriend six years, and we’ve lived together for four of them. I have never pressured him about marriage, and we have talked about it happening, but I’m starting to give up hope. While I feel content with our relationship, I’m becoming insecure about why he hasn’t asked me yet. I know it’s just a piece of paper, but I’d like to have the commitment before we have kids. On another note, he is the first man I’ve been with that has a very low sex drive—we go for weeks without having sex. As a professional, I’m asking, is this a red flag?

See what celebrity psychologist Dr. Sherry Blake has to say about this situation on Essence.com.

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Recently, I was scrolling through my Facebook timeline and saw that one of my friends had finally proposed to his girlfriend. I was super excited because it had been a long-time coming, but as I read the details of the proposal — namely the location where he asked — I had a super duper pause moment: that’s where he decided to pop the question?!

I won’t bust out the exact restaurant since my name is on this, but think Chiles,  Applebees, or some other national restaurant chain that people go to every single week for a cheap Friday night meal. Like it wasn’t even Black Folks’ holy grail fancy restaurant location Red Lobster (don’t act like most of us didn’t realize Red Lobster wasn’t a top notch eatery until we were 22), it was a basic, no type of ambiance having, run of the mill place to grab a bite. Not the place I personally would want to be asked something so monumental.

Now before you go calling me boughie or hit me me with the “you just wish someone was asking you to marry them” shade, let me explain my surprise just a bit. I knew this friend was going to propose for a long time now — actually everyone did. For starters, he and his then-girlfriend had already moved in together as a cost-saving measure for the wedding they knew they would be planning in the near future. And when it came down to when he was going to actually pop the question, he initially said it would be during the Thanksgiving holiday with his fiancee’s family. When that didn’t happen, the Christmas holiday seemed to be the next date, but then financial obstacles deterred that plan and the decision was put on hold indefinitely. He told everyone “it’s coming” and after Valentine’s Day came and went, I figured he was looking at winter holidays again and by the time everyone was wishing people a Merry Christmas, we’d also be saying “congratulations!” So that’s why when on a random week-day afternoon I saw it finally went down at a place I’d only pop in because I could get a drink and dinner for $15 I was a little…shocked.

To make sure I wasn’t trippin, I took a survey of female friends and co-workers and they all agreed that as they say in real estate, “location is everything.” Now I haven’t had the chance  to get all the details from my friend to see whether there was some sort of sentimental value attached to that restaurant, but that situation aside, I started to think about where I’d want someone to ask me that question and the truth is location is just as important as all the other details that go into a proposal. The same way you wouldn’t want someone to pull a Lil’ Scrappy and ask, “so is you gone marry a ni**a,” most women have places they either dream of being asked, or would absolutely die if someone popped the question there.

For instance, I’ve heard some girls say they would hate for their boyfriend to take them on a talk show and surprise them with the big question, or to have a “would you marry be Monica” proposal plastered on the jumbo tron at any type of sporting event. A lot of people also don’t want a crowd around and prefer that it’s a Tony Tony Tone, “it’s just me and you” type of occasion. The idea isn’t that it has to be romantic, but I would think intimacy would be the operative word here.

No situation lends itself more to the different strokes for different folks type of philosophy than marriage and all that goes with it, including the proposal and wedding, but I think it’s safe to say if you’re going to ask such a life-changing question, you had better do it in a place where there aren’t a bunch of random people sitting around drinking beers and yelling expletives at 42-inch TV screens while crunching on peanuts sprawled all over the floor. Unless you’re that type of gal.

What do you think? Does it matter where a guy pops the question?

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You and your guy love each other. You’ve been dating for two years or more. You live together and split the bills — all of them. His parents love you and vice versa. You have a dog together and everything is basically his and hers, yet the ring still hasn’t come. Based on the way your relationship has been progressing, it’s clear that the next logical step would be a proposal, but it just hasn’t happened and you’re starting to get confused. Don’t worry just yet. Here are 14 legitimate reasons for why he hasn’t proposed to you.

I don’t know why I’m as excited for Kandi’s engagement as I would be one of my close friends but after the heartbreak one of my favorite “Real Housewives of Atlanta” girls has gone through, I’m happy to see her so happy — and newly blinged out.

We told you a couple of days ago that the singer-songwriter got engaged to her line producer boo thang, Todd Tucker, on New Year’s Eve, and the couple just did a spread for US Magazine showing off the new jewel Miss Bedroom Kandi is now rocking on her ring finger. The two-carat white diamond engagement ring was designed by Gregg Ruth and definitely looks good on Kandi, who can now use that hand to wave goodbye to the “forever single club” she thought she was apart of. And the best part of it all is Kandi’s 10-year-old daughter, Riley, gave Todd her blessing before he proposed at 1:30 am New Year’s Day. We’ll have to see how she feels when Kandi and Todd start popping out those babies in a couple years.

Congrats again!

Source: Getty Images

New Year’s engagement news isn’t quite over yet. We already told you one Atlanta housewife got engaged over the holidays but it turns out there was another proposal on the ‘Real Housewives of Atlanta” set. US Weekly just broke the news that Kandi Burruss and her boo of one year, line producer, Todd Tucker, are getting married!

Tucker, 39, popped the question on New Year’s Day, during a New Year’s celebration with friends at the couple’s home in Atlanta. (Among the party guests was fellow Atlanta Housewife Phaedra Parks, who’s currently expecting her second child with husband Apollo Nida.) After talking it over with Burruss’ daughter, 10-year-old Riley — who gave him her blessing — he got down on one knee and proposed to his love of more than a year with a two-carat diamond sparkler by Gregg Ruth.

The singer-songwriter, 36 — who has been engaged once before, to the late Ashley “A.J.” Jewell – was floored. “I was totally surprised,” she tells Us of the romantic proposal, adding that she even shed a few happy tears.

Awww! The couple reportedly already has a couple of dates in mind for the big day and is muddling over a few details like whether they will air their special ceremony for the world to see. As we all know, Kandi has had a rocky love life. Toward the end of 2008, she starting dating Ashley Jewel, whom she later became engaged to in January 2009. Sadly, on October 22 of that same year he past away from head injuries he sustained during a fight. Speaking on her struggle to find the man to finally settle down with, Kandi told US:

“I used to make jokes with my friends that I [was] part of the Forever Single Club.”

Now that she’s changed her mind about that, she’s also removing herself from the I don’t want anymore kids club, saying:

“That’s what I said before, but now I’m totally different.”

Congrats to one of our favorite housewives!

Source: Twitter

Watching Nene and Gregg rekindle the love that appears to have only been lost for about a split second has been adorable on this latest season of the “Real Housewives of Atlanta.” Nene has been putting her ex-husband through the ringer and he’s been eager to meet every challenge — and more importantly get back a key to her house and most likely her heart. As of now, it appears his hard work has paid off because according to Nene’s twitter timeline she’s about to become Mrs. Leakes all over again.

Nene tweeted a few pics showing the romantic evening Gregg planned out for her, starting with lining the hallway of their beach condo with roses.

Source: Twitter

Later, she tweeted that they had a romantic nightcap fit for two, in which Gregg (or somebody he paid) spelled out their names in Hershey kisses.

Source: twitter

The chocalatey goodness carried on into the bedroom, where there were Hershey’s laid out on the bed in the shape of a heart, to which Nene responded, “It’s on now!’

Source: Twitter

It appears she got more than a romp in the hay though. Twenty minutes after posting the bed pic, she tweeted:

I’m pretty sure she wasn’t just talking about him asking can he get some. When you think about the couple’s interactions this season, this really doesn’t come as much surprise. In fact, most people didn’t even believe the two had gotten divorced because they’ve been seen out together all the time. Earlier this year, Nene told Ebony of their split:

“It hurt me to file for divorce, but I had to see it through. I let him know you’re going to be my husband and you’re not going to be somebody else’s anything, but if you plan to be somebody else’s anything, then we can’t be together.”

That clearly was not his plan because he seems to want to be Nene’s everything right about now — and that appears to be alright with her too. She just told Sister 2 Sister in their latest issue:

“When we broke up, Gregg moved out for a year. We divorced while Gregg was out. Then, once we divorced, we found ourselves being friends. And there was nothing left to fight about.”

Kudos to Nene for standing her ground and showing Gregg he had to prove himself if he wanted that old thing back. Looks like there will be another RHOA wedding on the next season. Congrats to the Leakes!

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When my husband proposed to me, I was blown away. We hadn’t been dating for two years yet and I’d always thought that I’d date a guy for at least that long before we got engaged. We hadn’t looked at rings and I was surprised that he was able to keep his plans a secret from everyone we knew. The proposal was a treasure hunt and I was unnerved that he’d hidden a huge pink & green gift bag holding the first “clue” inside in my apartment (in my bedroom!) without my knowledge for more than a week.

You know what wasn’t surprising about his proposal? The fact that he wanted to marry me. I knew that already.

I thought about that while listening to Brandy’s most recent Breakfast Club interview. The singer has not been shy at all about her desire to marry her boyfriend A&R producer, Ryan Press. In fact, in May of this year she told Ebony magazine, “I wish we were engaged.  He’s taking a little long on the ring side of things, but I’m patient.”  A few months ago she asked Sister2Sister magazine readers to “keep your fingers crossed for sometime soon I will be engaged.” And when the Breakfast Club asked her about a possible engagement, she said “a ring is coming”.

Brandy’s openness about wanting to be engaged has definitely drawn criticism and most are painting her as thirsty, desperate, clingy and co-dependent. But why? Because she knows she wants to marry her boyfriend and is giddy about a possible proposal?

This isn’t to defend Brandy per say. Maybe she is desperate. She obviously doesn’t realize that one interview on the subject is enough because the advent of the internet means five hundred blogs will repost one source. Interviewers keep baiting her by asking about her love life and she remains candid and continues to talk about it.

But I think her brazen honesty about what she wants is something other women should try in their own going-nowhere relationships. Brandy and Ryan have reportedly been dating for more than two years. They’re both self-sufficient adults. If they’re not dating with the intention to get married — and they both intend to be married to someone some day — then what are they doing? I can only assume that the two have discussed getting married and now she is just (publicly) anticipating the proposal. In that case, it’s different, but not desperate.

In fact, if Brandy were a guy telling the Breakfast Club that “it’s a great thing when you’re in love with someone and you’re connected. You want to share your life with them” then panties would be all over the blogosphere. But because she’s a woman who is open about her desire to marry her man then she is labeled a “thirst-bucket”. Why is that?

It’s okay for a woman to be confident that she is marriage material and that her boyfriend loves her and wants to marry her even if she isn’t engaged yet. In fact, I would hope that a woman does know that before she gets engaged. Why should the fact that a man wants to marry you be a surprise? This isn’t some ridiculous chick flick. In real life, it makes sense for marriage minded adults to date intentionally. I once heard a guy say, “[seriously] dating someone without the intention to marry her is like going to the grocery store without any money.” I agree with that.  If you’re in a serious relationship with a man, it’s not wrong to have the conversations that result in the expectation that he wants to marry you, just like he should be able to go out and secretly get a ring because he expects you want to marry him too.

The problem is so many women allow men to get serious with them without being serious about them. A woman is admonished not to “pressure” him or “rush” him lest she “scare him away” as though what she wants in the relationship doesn’t matter. Why aren’t men made to feel like dragging their feet indefinitely might scare women away? If it’s okay for a man not to want to get married then it’s okay for a woman to want to get married. Why are women always the ones who are supposed to relax and “wait it out”? Why aren’t men encouraged to man up and commit?

It’s hilarious that women will eat up articles describing “365 Ways To Know Your Boyfriend Wants To Marry You” but if another woman already knows her ring is on the way then she’s the object of scorn and ridicule. Maybe some women aren’t interested in just dating a guy forever, living with him for years, and popping out his babies. Maybe some women desire to move beyond “wifey” to “wife”. Maybe some women would much rather scare the wimp away and be alone for a few minutes than be dragged on for years by the same guy without ever getting married.

Maybe some women are justifiably confident that he’s going to pop the question eventually….and if you asked their boyfriends, they’d tell you the first clue in her Treasure Hunt proposal is already hidden in her bedroom.

Follow Alissa on Twitter @AlissaInPink or check out her blog This Cannot Be My Life.

Source: thegrio.com

Alexis Welch is winning.

After ten years and three kids with New York Knicks power forward and center Amar’e Stoudemire, he proposed to her last week…in Paris…with an 8.5 carat stunner for all of his Twitter followers to see:

Source: https://twitter.com/Amareisreal

A couple of days later, he referred to his new fiance as his “lioness” on Twitter while they took in the Miami-Celtics game courtside. Well, anyone who can stay with an NBA player for ten years and three kids without a ring is certainly a lioness.

Outside of these reality shows, we rarely hear from NBA wives and girlfriends, especially while things are good, but Alexis talked to the New York Post today about how they met, the proposal and moving to NYC.

About the proposal she said:

“I’m usually on top of everything, but he got me. We were going to France to visit Cognac [area],” says Welch, who describes a whirlwind trip of cognac tasting, plus a jaunt to Paris, where they stayed in the royal suite at Le Meurice Hotel Belle Etoile, went to the Louvre and took in a Kanye West and Jay-Z concert.

On their last night in the French capital, she says, “We went back [to the room], and there were rose petals leading to a balcony with a 365-degree view of Paris. We walked out to the twinkling lights of the Eiffel Tower.

“He had an acoustic-guitar player. He had a saxophonist. This is another side of Amar’e that people don’t get to see. I’m just getting teary-eyed talking about it.”

Stoudemire hired a photographer to capture their trip, including the magical moment.

The duo flew home the next morning to tell their children, who are equally excited.

The pair met when they were just nineteen. Welch says the conversation clicked, and because she is 5-foot-10, she liked that he was 6-foot-11: “I’ve always liked guys who were taller than me when I wear heels.”

About moving to NYC from Miami, she told the NY Post that she isn’t expecting her life to change too much. “She does plan on working with the Amar’e Stoudemire Foundation, which focuses on outreach to at-risk youth, adding, ‘I’ll take my time and only do things that make sense for our family.’”

Welch says most of her friends are in Phoenix but she likes the Knicks players wives and girlfriends and she feels closest to Tyson Chandler’s wife.

She said: “It’s been a whirlwind. I’m so overjoyed. Everyone is calling, wanting to know all of the details. I’m marrying my best friend.”

A wedding date hasn’t been set, but the couple plans to marry in 2013.

Alissa Henry is a freelance writer living in Columbus, OH. Follow her on Twitter @AlissaInPink or check out her blog: This Cannot Be My Life

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