All Articles Tagged "pregnancy"
If there’s one thing I’ve learned during my pregnancy experience it’s that everyone has their own journey. It’s great to get pointers from other mothers on what to expect and how things will go, but in the end your body is going to do what your body will do. It’s been five months since I had my first child, a son, and, thankfully, I was able to remain active on the exercise front throughout the entire pregnancy, and give birth without meds after being in the hospital for seven hours.
The pregnancy and birthing experience was similar to what some of my girlfriends told me I could expect, but one area that didn’t pan out quite how I thought was my desire for sex. Now let me preface this by saying I don’t have the sex drive and sadly – for my husband at least — did not experience the increased libido I’ve heard other pregnant ladies brag about. My husband and I had sex throughout the entire pregnancy but we weren’t hanging from chandeliers or anything — not that I could. What’s funny is how many sexual dreams I began to have after my pregnancy that made me feel like a teenager. “Why on Earth was I thinking about bumpin’ and grindin’ when I have a child?” I thought. “I just gave birth!”
Even though I was back in the gym within a few weeks of giving birth, I made the decision to wait the full six to eight weeks before I could open up my stairway to heaven below. Regardless of your pregnancy experience, if you delivered vaginally then you know how sore your lady part gets – and how long it feels sore. God bless my husband for being patient (what else could he do), but I surely did play double dutch with my emotions. One day I was ready to give sex a try only to take it back out of fear.
I’m not gonna lie, the first time after giving birth felt like the first time ever. I was awkward and very fearful that I was going to rip something – even though my stitches had already dissolved. After the second time I felt a bit silly. “What am I doing?” I said to myself. “No man part is going to break my sweet Nancy.” And then it dawned on me, I just gave birth, got my snatch back within three weeks and proudly joined the mother’s club. What do I have to be fearful of? If men think there’s something sexy about a pregnant woman then us ladies need to think there’s something even hotter about a mother who gave birth. Our bodies change, we get more curves, and we are now in charge of this little blessing of life.
From then on I started to think about myself in a new light – one with self-confidence and awareness. Damnit I looked good for being someone’s mother and didn’t need to wear a MILF t-shirt to show it. It was this confidence that made love making with my husband all the more special. I switched up my intimate apparel, made sure to stay fresh and ready by way of Vagisil’s Moisturizing Wash, and became this new woman around my husband. He was shocked when I would prance around him and give him a peep show once our son was sleep. Granted I didn’t do it all the time because we were both tired from waking up at night, but there was this vixen I felt needed to get out.
We had midday meetings where we didn’t make it to the bedroom and took each other in the hallway. If I heard a sensual song I would save it on my phone and add it to my “lovemaking soundtrack.” Child I even invented characters like Keisha from the South (random I know) who would twerk and ride if you know what I mean.
I reclaimed my sexual empowerment not because my husband was a good man and stuck it out, but because I deserved loving too. Our love life since the birth of our son has been wilder, more random and freakier than before. I see why Beyoncé made a grown woman’s album!
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If it always seems like pregnancies among your social circles come back to back or in multiples, a new study suggests that it’s not all in your head. According to the study, young women whose high school friends have bore children are more likely to join the mommy club shortly after. Researchers note that they noticed the trend in young women in the United States who planned their pregnancies. However, the baby-making decisions of friends showed no direct impact on unplanned pregnancies.
“In our study we focus on high school friends because the later a friendship is formed, the more likely it is that the individual chooses the friends on common future family plans or common family orientations,” Nicoletta Balbo, a researcher at the Carlo F. Dondena Center for Research on Social Dynamics at Bocconi University in Italy told Reuters Health.
The study followed 1,170 of women beginning in the 1990s when they were adolescents. The participants were interviewed several times over the years. Out of the 1,170 participants, 820 became pregnant during the study. According to what the women revealed during interviews, approximately half of the pregnancies were planned, while the other half were not. The study revealed that after one friend in each pair had a baby, the likelihood of that other friend having a baby went up for nearly two years, the declined.
According to Balbo, who coauthored the study with Nicola Barban, a sociologist at the University of Groningen in the Netherlands, there are three ways in which a friend may influence another friend’s decision to have a child.
“The first mechanism that might be at play is the so-called social influence,” she said. “We all compare ourselves to our friends and being surrounded by friends who are parents makes us feel pressure to conform to parental status as well.”
The second mechanism is social learning, says Balbo.
“Friends are an important learning source,” she explained. “Becoming a parent is a radical change in an individual’s or a couple’s life, and by observing our friends, we can learn how to fulfill this new role and therefore be more willing to become parents.”
Lastly, Balbo says having children at the same time as a friend can prove to be less stressful and more cost-effective.
“For example, we can share the childbearing experience and thus reduce the stresses and costs associated with pregnancy and child rearing,” she said. “In contrast, being the only childless couple within a group of friends who have children can lead to isolation.”
Researchers note that the association between friends and childbearing was only studied in first-borns and not subsequent births.
If You Knew Your Unborn Child Would Be Born With Immense Health Challenges, Would You Have An Abortion?
I think that the abortion debate is interesting because it mainly centers around the question of whether or not termination is right or wrong – with the usual answers varying from you should be able to do it whenever you want to do it, to you should absolutely never do it. However, rarely do we discuss or even question the merits of choosing life when the alternative might be more just.
I know, that sounds horrible. But here’s what I mean:
The New York Daily News reported on the story of Australian “miracle” twins, Hope and Faith, who were born with a rare medical condition called diprosopus, where the two babies share one body, although they have two faces and separate brains. According to the Daily News, the condition is so rare that only 40 cases have been recorded since the 1860s and most diprosopus babies are stillborn or rarely live past a day. Currently, Hope and Faith are still in intensive care, although hospital officials report that the twins are eating and are breathing “perfectly” on their own.
The Daily News story includes pictures of the twins, which are kind of heart-wrenching as you can’t help but think about the quality of life they might have in the event that they do survive and live long lives. Equally heart-wrenching are the words from Renee Young and Simon Howie, the parents of the twin girls, who say the twins received their diagnosis when Young was 19 weeks pregnant. And yet, they maintain that termination (aka, an abortion) was not even considered an option. As the Daily News writes: “If I only get two days with the baby, I only get two days with the baby, at least I have some time with ‘it.’”
That’s kind of cavalier…
I’m not sure why these kind of stories are celebrated as some sort of marvel of the world when the reality is that these parents had advance notice that their children would be born into the same body. It’s seems pretty expected if you ask me. And maybe even cruel and irresponsible too. As medical history has shown, these types of births never end well. And I imagine that the children could be experiencing pain in their fight to stay alive – one that they statistically might not survive.
I realize that this is a sensitive topic. And I also realize that there are religious connotations, particularly the over-reliance in hope and faith (no pun intended whatsoever) even in the face of readily available options, which likely contribute to the decision of the parents. Plus, I don’t want to downplay (at all) the difficulty in terminating a wanted pregnancy, which is never an easy choice. But where does the well-being of the children come into play in any of it, when you knowingly let a fetus become severely handicapped children? Outside the daily challenges of being ostracized and limited in society and in their own lives (what if Hope wants to be a doctor and Faith wants to be a lawyer? Who wins?), these children will have but the life-long (however long that may be) health problems associated with two people living in the same body.
By my reproductive politics, I am pro-choice. And for all intents and purposes, that means the choice for a woman to decide life when termination might be more humane. But just as those who believe in the right to life think that women should consider all moral questions prior to having an abortion (including mandatory ultrasounds, pre-abortion right-to-be-born counseling and all other ways we restrict free access to abortion), I believe that potential parents should truly weigh those same moral authorities when considering a child’s right to not be born into a situation where the minimum requirements to live can not be guaranteed. Just a thought.
Back in March, we told you about reports that Ciara dropped nearly $20,000 on a Safari-themed nursery for her baby. While it was never actually confirmed whether or not those rumors were true, Future did reveal that his very pregnant fiancée has been working hard to get the baby’s nursery together.
“We’ve been shopping, she done changed the whole house up for the baby,” Future shared during an interview. “We had to get bigger houses, bigger rooms, everything.The rooms changed. The guest room done changed into the baby room. The closets, man she told me, ‘You gotta get rid of your clothes, the baby clothes need to be in here.’ I’m like, ‘hold on.’ She’s like ‘We have too many clothes, we have too many shoes.’”
“The [baby's] room is beautiful. I can’t wait for you to see it,” he added.
Well, that time has finally arrived. On Instagram yesterday, CiCi debuted a photo of the all-white nursery she put together for her baby boy. And it’s absolutely darling! It’s unclear if she went with the safari theme, as she only showcased a portion of the nursery, but it looks like he’ll be very comfy there.
“In Love With My @angelsonghome Gliding Chair, and My @BrattDecor Baby Crib For My Little Prince,” she wrote. “This Is All Surreal. Everything About This Time And Process…Wow!!:)”
Just four months after giving birth to her son, Maceo, Halle Berry hit the red carpet looking absolutely amazing. Now, she’s speaking out about her post-baby body. According to Halle, she’s not overly concerned with shedding the baby weight.
“I’m healthy and that’s really good. When you’re nursing you can’t really diet because you have to keep producing milk,” she told PEOPLE. “Listen, I’m healthy and I’m happy and that’s all that matters.”
Halle also discussed juggling work and a new baby.
“[A new baby means] less sleep,” she says. “And I’m working on the TV show, [Extant]. It’s a new grind, it’s a new rhythm. We’re trying to get used to that. We’re managing.”
Despite the new change in her schedule and lack of sleep, Halle is extremely excited about baby Maceo.
“[He's] perfect, just perfect. More love, more joy — having a new baby in your family brings that,” she expressed.
As for the baby advice she’d offer former co-star and new dad, Bruce Willis, Halle jokes:
“Well, I’m nursing right now. I don’t think he’s nursing himself so I don’t know what I could tell him.”
We’re super happy for her.
Family Of Woman Who Shot Pregnant Friend Over Facebook Feud, Killing The Baby, Say “It Was Clearly Self-Defense”
In an exclusive with the New York Daily News, the sister of 35-year-old Virginia Wyche – the woman who shot a former friend in the stomach and wound up killing her unborn baby after the pregnant woman showed up at Wyche’s home to talk about a fight they had on Facebook – says her sister shot the woman in self-defense.
Katrice Wyche, 42, told the Daily News that 23-year-old Markeisha Brooks, pregnant and allegedly looking for trouble, arrived at their mother’s home in Jacksonville, Fl. looking for Virginia, and brought other women with her to jump Virginia after the two fell out online.
“She had three other people with her to guarantee that my sister got beat up, but it did not work out like that.
The girl slapped my sister! When she went to hit her again, that’s when my sister shot her.”
Katrice doesn’t live in Jacksonville anymore, as she now resides in Pasadena, Texas. But she was able to speak with her sister after she was arrested and that’s the story Virginia gave her. Virginia has been charged with attempted murder and has a bond set at a whopping $1 million.
But she says that since Virginia was on her property and wanted the women off, she was standing her ground, so she doesn’t understand the high bond. Katrice also says that she wants Brooks held accountable for seeking out a fight with Virginia when she knew she was pregnant. Katrice said this about a conversation with her jailed sister:
“She said, ‘Katrice, I don’t understand why I’m in here.’ My sister’s bond should not be $1 million. It was clearly self-defense. I want my sister out of jail.
My sister was like, ‘I’m in my house, get off my property.’”
People in the Jacksonville neighborhood Virginia lives in have told various media outlets that she has always been a very peaceful and cheerful person, so they were shocked to hear that she shot Brooks. Once again, the whole ugly situation stemmed from an argument the former friends had on Facebook the night before the shooting happened. While Brooks’ unborn child didn’t make it, her family, who haven’t spoken in detail as of yet about the situation, said that she was in critical condition but “will survive.”
Pregnancy is an exciting time! With the all the changes and anticipation, it can be hard to maintain your regular life, much less your sex life. Fortunately, your love life doesn’t have to slow down during pregnancy. In fact, sex during pregnancy can bring you and your partner closer together.
Don’t believe me? That’s ok. I have 10 tips to tell you otherwise!
Here are 10 tips for keeping a healthy sex life when you’re pregnant:
1. Don’t be afraid to have sex if you want to.
For most women, sex is perfectly safe during all trimesters of a normal pregnancy. Talk to your doctor if you have any concerns about sex while you are pregnant.
2. Try something new.
Many women experience an increased sex drive as they enter their second trimester, which can be a great time to experiment with different positions or adding a little kink to the mix. Check out this blog post for some great information on safe kink during pregnancy.
3. Make sure you are comfortable.
Your body goes through a lot of changes during your pregnancy. Positions or touching that you enjoyed before may suddenly cause irritation or discomfort while you are pregnant. Be sure to talk to your partner about anything that feels uncomfortable, so you and your partner enjoy your time in the bedroom.
4. Be intimate.
If sex doesn’t feel good, there are lots of other ways you can still remain intimate with your partner. Kissing, cuddling, sensual massages or hugging brings you and your partner closer together and can help fulfill your sexual desires even if you don’t feel like having intercourse. Receiving oral sex can offer release without the discomfort from penetration and often due to the increase in sensitivity can feel more pleasurable than before.
5. Find the best positions.
Know which sex positions work best for the different stages of your pregnancy. Missionary and other positions where you are lying on your back can be uncomfortable as your pregnancy progresses, and can even be unsafe after the fourth month of pregnancy, because they put pressure on major blood vessels. Avoid putting weight and pressure on your abdomen by using positions like woman on top, spooning, or side by side. Experiment and find what works best for you and your partner. This doesn’t have to be a chore, it really can be exciting! Consider using this as a chance to have adventurous sex on a different piece of furniture or in a new room of your house.
Read more tips at HelloBeautiful.com
‘I Wanted To Spend Time Bonding With My Baby:’ Tamera Mowry-Housley Reveals It Took A Year To Shed The Baby Weight
Tamera Mowry-Housley recently flaunted her post-baby bikini body for In Touch Weekly and she looks amazing! Interestingly, she revealed that it was her first time rocking a bikini since her honeymoon back in 2011.
“It’s the first time I’ve been in a bikini since my honeymoon,” said Tamera. “I feel great!”
As you may know, the “Sister, Sister” actress married Fox News correspondent Adam Housley in a 2011 ceremony. Just one year later the couple welcomed their first child, Aden. Weighing in at 127 pounds, the new mom revealed that it took her an entire year to shed the baby weight, but adds that she’s proud that she lost it at her own pace.
“I want to punch them in the face!” she joked about fellow Hollywood moms who are able to miraculously dispose of those baby pounds in mere weeks.
“I wanted to spend time bonding with my baby,” she adds, “not killing myself at the gym.”
As a result, Tamera decided to nurse baby Aden for seven months and once that period was over, she cut her 1,700-calorie-a-day diet by 500 calories and began to “kick it into gear” by hitting the gym 5 times per week.
Check out Tamera’s full body-after-baby spread in the latest issue of In Touch Weekly.
Back in October we learned that Future popped the question to Ciara at her 28th birthday bash. Shortly after, we learned that the couple is expecting their first child together. So naturally, wedding planning has taken a backseat.
“We don’t have a date,” the Atlanta rapper recently told Access Atlanta. “She was getting everything situated. She has to wait until we have our baby because you know, she gotta fit for the dress.”
Speaking of their highly anticipated bundle of joy, Future also recently shared with Rolling Out magazine that he believes has has drastically matured and is fully aware of what’s expected of him as a father and CiCi’s soon-to-be husband
“It makes you grow up. Certain things that you used to do, you can’t do anymore. Certain habits you had, [now] you’ve got to break ‘em quick!” he explained.
“It’s about maturing and going to that next level — because I’m getting married and have a new baby coming. That causes me to change and go to another level. The things that you used to do, you can’t do it anymore because of your situation. And it just goes along with getting older and knowing how to carry yourself and knowing how to maneuver through life.”
This has to be a super exciting time in both of their lives. We’re wishing them the best!
Surrogacy, once reserved for women with fertility complications, is now being used by women who wish to skip the grueling nine-month ordeal — either to protect their career, preserve their fit bodies, or dodge the labor pains, The Daily Mail reports.
It’s called “social surrogacy,” when women opt to have another woman carry their biological children “based on personal reasons rather than medical necessity,” CBS Philly adds. And it’s on the rise.
“I call these cases designer surrogacy,” said Dr. Lorni Arnold, a San Diego-based fertility doctor. His patients have included a socialite who “didn’t want to get fat” and a jogger who wanted to run a marathon.
“We have people who are afraid of being pregnant,” said Dr. Saira Jhutty, CEO of Conceptual Options, a San Diego-based fertility clinic. “Some people work in an industry where image is very important so they don’t want to have to go through the changes that happen to a woman’s body when they get pregnant.”
Jhutty also noted that there are a handful of professional women who are fearful that pregnancy may interfere with their careers. Take Mari Smith, 36, for example, a wedding photographer whose career finally kicked off:
“Mari had been putting off having a baby with her husband because business was finally booming, and she couldn’t bear to risk wrecking it. What’s more, she was working 60 hours a week to build her brand and says she simply didn’t have time for pregnancy, much less potential complications like morning sickness or being put on bed rest. With her baby clock ticking louder and louder, she spoke with [her] clinical psychologist friend, Jhutty,” according to the newspaper.
Smith’s concern is valid; the workforce isn’t very welcoming of expectant mothers. Employers often fish for legal excuses to fire their pregnant workers. Recent studies show that “fewer than 40 percent of working women in the United States get paid pregnancy leave.” Only nine percent of employers offer full pay. But is surrogacy the answer? One Huffington Post author finds the whole social surrogacy trend disturbing.
“When there are millions of women who are desperate to be pregnant, literally going broke trying to make a baby, these women [...] are opting not to be pregnant so they can wear their skinny jeans? Can someone please tell me why this is OK?,” the site says.
Despite the criticism and a whopping $100,000 expense, Smith will go through with the surrogacy. “Mari sees it as the best and most reliable way for her and her husband to finally expand their family,” The Daily Mail writes.