Madame Noire | Black Women's Lifestyle Guide | Black Hair | Black Love

If God was a black woman, I’m pretty sure her name would be Oprah Winfrey.

Yes that Oprah. The all-mighty, powerful former Queen of Daytime Talk, who wants to be loved by all, rewards her faithful flock with a few of her “favorite things” and preached the gospel of life lessons and positive living through her master classes.  Oprah can move mountains, part seas and, with a stamp of her approval, can make any mere mortal into an overnight success. I often wonder what the world be like without Oprah’s watchful eye.  And when times get tough in my own personal life, I fall to my knees, in prayer and ask the heavens: what would Oprah Do?

Of course, I say this in jest but the way I hear some folks talk about the infinite power of Oprah to manipulate and influence change makes me wonder about the false power we assign to entertainers like Winfrey.  There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t hear or see in some context folks asking, “Why hasn’t Oprah done…?” Usually that question comes up in regards to the lack of financial support for some project or campaign happening within the community. But I have also seen it asked of just about anything including: “If Oprah has so much money, why hasn’t she funded the movies of every black filmmaker in Hollywood?” and “Oprah has her own network, so why doesn’t Oprah hire more Black people?” or “Why hasn’t Oprah did a show on late great jazz legend Phyllis Hyman (no actually that’s a real question)?” and “If there is not enough supermarkets in the Black community, why hasn’t Oprah written a few checks to have them all built?” and “Why hasn’t Oprah waved her magic wand and put a stop to black on black crime yet?” and “What do you mean they’re closing schools in Detroit? You know who could fix that? Oprah.” The list goes on and on.

Yes, there are a million things in the black community, which Winfrey has unceremoniously been given the task to fix. And with a net worth of $2.7 billion, being number 2 on Forbes list of the world’s most powerful women, you can certainly understand the temptation to buy infinite amounts of share in Winfrey’s sway-stock.  However, is it all that fair to think that Winfrey has a moral obligation to reach back a hand to elevate black women and black men and “fix” everything that is wrong within the Black community?

I know that there is much to admire about the woman and truth be told her philanthropic legacy is immeasurable. However if we were to measure it, Oprah’s generosity comes somewhere around $350 million during her lifetime. During her reign as talk show queen, Winfrey created the Oprah’s Angel Network, a charity, which provided grants to nonprofit and charitable organizations around the world. All told, the Angel Network raised upwards of $80 million dollars with 100 percent of funds going to projects like rebuilding efforts in areas ravished by Hurricane Katrina, providing scholarships to 250 African-American men continue or complete their education at Morehouse College, building parks in her homebase of Chicago and providing support for organizations, which work with the poor and AIDS-affected children in Africa. And we can’t forget about the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in Johannesburg, South Africa, which Winfrey invested $40 million of her own money to build.

Likewise, her openhandedness hasn’t stopped at charity; she has used a portion of her “brand” in the cinema arena including producing work from Black Authors such as Gloria Naylor’s Women of Brewster’s Place, Zora Neal Hurston’s Their Eyes Were Watching God, The Wedding, Toni Morrison’s Beloved as well as Spike Lee’s X and Lee Daniel’s Precious.  So it’s not like Oprah doesn’t do what she can to make the world a better place so why isn’t it enough?

I guess Oprah’s bought into the whole marriage leads to divorce spiel—not that we didn’t kinda already know that. But people are still curious why, after being together for 26 years, she and Stedman haven’t made it official, and she told an audience during a filming of “Oprah’s Next Chapter” at the Jaipur Literature Festival in India that not marrying Stedman has been for the best.

“I think that had we gotten married we probably would have been divorced by now. And he would agree. I really am my own woman and I don’t really conform very well to other people ideas about who and what I should be and being married calls for some conformity.”

If there were any man who could take Oprah’s hand in marriage, she says it would be Stedman, but as things would have it, she says she simply isn’t the marrying kind.

I would think after 26 years together she’d still have to do some bending and compromising to make their relationship work, but maybe the freedom of knowing you can walk away when you want to without and legal or financial hassle at the end of the day keeps the peace. Still I wonder what all she thinks would be different if they had rings on their fingers.

What do you think about Oprah’s idea of what makes someone the marrying kind? Do you think you are or are you more like Oprah?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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You know Oprah wouldn’t miss the first graduating class from her school in South Africa, Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls, and she also wouldn’t show up at the graduation looking a mess. She kept it simple but fresh in this green frock, contrasting with the white dresses of her students.

Check out Oprah’s fit and some other pics from the day’s events at Styleblazer.com.

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While the OWN continues to struggle, Oprah has another accomplishment she can point to. Of the 75 students who attended the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy, 72 will graduate.

To make this news even better, all of these girls will head to universities in South Africa and the United States.

That’s inspiring.

See what Oprah had to say to her graduates and get the rest of the story at Black Voices.com.

OWN’s executive producers said we might be seeing more brown faces on the network and it looks like they’re following through. The Oprah Winfrey Network has hired Modern Day Matchmaker Paul Carrick Brunson, also known as he “the real-life Hitch,” to co-host the biggest dating challenge in TV history, as part of a new show called “Lovetown, USA.”

The program is one of three new original series being added to the network’s 2012 lineup, and will follow Brunson and co-host Kailen Rosenberg, as they transform Kingsland, GA, into “Lovetown USA.” The matchmakers will take over the city for 30 days to help eight singles find love, and producers promise everyone from the mayor to Kingsland’s local residents will be involved.

Paul Carrick Brunson is the first and only full-time black male matchmaker in the world so this gig is a huge deal for him. Filming for the show is expected to begin in the coming months. Check out the promo residents sent in to qualify for the show.

Will you check out Lovetown USA on OWN?

Well, here we are again with our weekend wrap-up! This weekend has given us quite the cup of tea including…a new baby!! So here we go…!

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What a year, huh?! We’ve seen some good, bad, and ugly moments in pop culture in 2011 and it is about time for us to put our spin on it as we head into 2012.  Take a moment to see what’s on our list and feel free to add your own memories in the comment section.

Oh yes, the list is in no particular order!

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It’s nearly the 1 year anniversary of media mogul Oprah Winfrey’s OWN network. While the station has struggled in the ratings a bit since debuting in January 2011, Ms. Winfrey has remained committed to her brand of uplifting, enlightening  and educational programming. You won’t catch any low-brow cat fights or baby mama drama on OWN, but you will learn lessons to make your life more meaningful. There’s a lot to look forward to on OWN in the new year. There are the stand-out programs that are getting  a second season as well as new exciting additions to the lineup. Here are some of the shows that  you can look forward to in 2012 on the OWN Network that you might want to ditch the smutty reality TV for.

For years I’ve been warning my male friends that women are going to win the gender wars that no official will admit exists (it’s a secret).

Slowly but surely, the Faction of She has been plotting to turn the odds back in her favor, rekindling an era when a Queens cunning, grace and power, trumped any Kings bravado, strength and intimidation.

Less than 50 years ago, employers could legally pay a woman less money for the exact same job. For decades after the Equal Pay Act, many employers found legal ways to do the same thing.

Though in 2010, TIME highlighted  a story based on a study about women under 30 who are making more money than their male counterparts. It’s been a long time coming…

Eventually, the more macho among us will rally and fight against the rising Faction of She, but by then it will be too late. Their cries for outrage will be outnumbered by women and her stay at home husbands, boy toys and sperm donors, men too evolved to fuss over who’s on top.

With this next group of ladies, there’s no questioning who’s on top, when it comes to stacks, and stacks, and stacks, of dough. This list of celebrities are quite used to making more money than their men:

The phrase ‘tell em why you mad son’ could possibly mean more than just a few words spawned from a hip-hop record. Although addressing your anger is normally thought of as negative, it actually has some positive affects that could benefit you in the long run.

For instance, have you ever been extremely angry but attempted to keep your anger to yourself?  You bottle it up inside until you become even more heated at the problem and any other problem that resembles the initial one. What starts off as a minor issue soon festers because you choose to bottle it up inside for fear of being classified as a bitter woman, or even worse, the “angry black woman.” Ironically, you eventually become bitter anyway because you allow the anger to build up. Well, for those of us who need to spur out a curse word or two every now and then when someone or something angers us, psychologists are saying that when channeled properly, anger can actually have some positive effects.

While perusing Oprah’s website I noticed an article on the secret benefits of anger. According to the article, appropriately titled “The Hidden Benefits of Anger, Cursing and Negativity,” unless your anger problems are chronic and you just like to freak out all the time because you can (not good), anger can actually combat stress. In the article Jennifer Lerner, director of the Harvard Decision Science Laboratory, says reacting with controlled anger, rather than runaway anxiety, releases less of the body’s stress hormone cortisol. This is something we lose too much of, which has been linked to bone loss, depression, and obesity.

So sometimes venting, cursing, or even hitting a pillow (not a person) allows you to release that anger that could instead fester and make you miserable in the long run. The thing with anger is the sooner you release it the better. Repressed anger can cause emotional indigestion. It builds up and creates even more intense anger and unfavorable emotions that could have possibly been prevented if you would have simply let it out.

Anger is a natural emotion. Instead of feeling bad for being angry, recognize the emotion and do something about it. Go for a walk and blow off steam, kick a rock like you’re David Beckham–do something, but don’t let your piping mad anger boil over. Just like any other emotion, you have to be careful of how you relay it externally. Of course, you should choose your battles wisely and not attempt to curse out everyone in sight. Instead, recognize your anger and find healthy ways (when necessary) to just let it out. So next time someone tells you being angry is a bad thing, tell them that it’s actually healthy sometimes. And then proceed to curse them out if necessary…(kidding).

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