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From MommyNoire

Having children can bring up all kinds of emotions, but we were surprised by Isabella Dutton’s essay in the Daily Mail that said her main emotion was no emotion at all. Thirty-three years after giving birth to her first child, she can still recall quite clearly how indifferent she felt at the sight of her five-day-old son, Stuart, in his crib.

What did it, exactly? “Quite simply, I had always hated the idea of motherhood,” Dutton writes. “In that instant, any lingering hope that becoming a mum would cure me of my antipathy was dispelled.” Believing it selfish to have just one child, two years later she had a daughter—and the same feelings toward motherhood. Dutton married her husband at age 19, not wanting children though he said he wanted four. He thought she would eventually change her mind and she did at age 22, but only out of her love for him. Though she didn’t relish the job, she still got in with it. Dutton says she fed and clothed her children, took them to the park; she said no to nannies, feeling she would be the best for her kids. She didn’t want to do a “halfhearted” job, but Dutton still said her children “were like parasites [and]…would continue to take from me and give nothing meaningful back in return.”

The reluctant mother says she missed her old life, though with her day job as a typist at a telecommunications company, it’s not that she was doing anything terribly exciting. What she misses most is her time to herself and her uninterrupted time with her husband. Dutton is careful to point out her attitude toward having children isn’t a result of her own childhood. “Mum and I were close; even as an adult I could always confide in her. My childhood was very happy and conventional. Like most little girls I played with dolls. But I never recall a time when I wanted those make-believe games of motherhood to become a reality.”

Read more on MommyNoire.com.

From YourTango.com

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In the beginning of any courtship, everyone shows up wearing their finest mask and putting forth their best foot. We all can agree that we have found ourselves attracted to someone of the opposite sex who appeared to be perfect on paper until we discovered a little more about him or her that was a complete turn off. We could list a number of deal-breakers that can be a killjoy to a new relationship, but below you will find some of the top four that will shut down the fireworks of any new encounter.

1. Dishonesty

The discovery that a person is not who they say they are is the number one deal breaker. I once coached a client who dated a man that acted like he was a professional athlete who was a divorced doting father of two. Once the relationship got serious, she discovered that the man had a ton of debt, did not consistently pay his bills or child support and was still married to his wife albeit going through a divorce. Distrust from the start is a shot in the heart to any potential love encounter.

For the complete list, visit YourTango.com.

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