As long as reality television shows continue to dominate the airways, there will almost always be matchmaking shows to tune in to. There’s Bravo’s Millionaire Matchmaker, VH1′s Making Mr. Right, NBC’s Ready For Love and so on. Now Oxygen is joining the ranks of television networks with matchmaking series. I know you’re probably thinking, “Here comes another one of those shows. What makes this one different from all the rest?” Well, according to a press release issued by Oxygen, Find Me My Man is coming with an “urban” twist.

Natalie Clarice, known in her community as the “Titan of Love” is a Miami-based matchmaker and owner of successful matchmaking firm for the “urban elite,”  Heart & Soul International. The show will document Natalie as she helps some of the single ladies of Miami find Mr. Right. A brief description of the show reads:

“In each episode Natalie and her team of romance strategists put two single ladies to the ultimate test using a variety of unconventional and unique techniques. Natalie is determined to crack Miami’s hardest cases and isn’t afraid to tell it like it is to her strong-willed clients, who are often their own worst enemies when it comes to dating. From a client who has a 15-minute countdown clock for her dates to impress her, to a pageant queen who wears her sash and tiara on first dates, these women have some outrageous quirks that are keeping them from finding love [...] Utilizing the urban population in Miami, Clarice capitalizes on a niche market of diverse professionals.”

Something else that may actually set Natalie apart from many other matchmakers is that she’s been married for thirteen years.

Find Me My Man is executive produced by Alex Duda and Jason Sands under Endemol USA. It is scheduled to premiere April 9  at 9pm ET/PT on Oxygen.

Judging by the show’s trailer, it looks like it could be rather entertaining.

Turn the page for a sneak peek and let us know what you think! Is this a show you could see yourself watching or are you completely over matchmaking reality shows?

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Are you the “caretaker” in your group of friends, always helping people move, preparing them for job interviews, making them soup while sick and lending a listening ear? Then you probably have an urge to delve into their love lives, too. But that’s not as straightforward as adding salt and hot water.  Here’s how to be a matchmaker your friends will actually seek help from.

You may already know about Paul Brunson by now. The relationship expert and author of It’s Complicated (But It Doesn’t Have to Be): A Modern Guide to Finding and Keeping Love has been working it in the past few years and has become the go-to guy (behind Steve Harvey) to dish out relationship and matchmaking advice. So of course we were delighted that the happily married man dropped by Madame Noire offices to talk about how he met his wife and address some of our readers’ biggest questions about love and relationships. For one, he doesn’t believe in soulmates. Yeah, that’s pretty interesting considering he’s in the business of love, right? Watch to see him explain his stance on soulmates and his other opinions about matchmaking.

It’s been three years since Jasmine Diaz founded the Shawn Mackenzi Agency. Long before that, the entertainment and marketing industry maven accepted her true career calling as a matchmaker. Married for more than 10 years, Diaz established Shawn Mackenzi because of the relationship hardships she witnessed among friends and family — especially within the black community.

The high profile Los Angeles-based matchmaking business caters to affluent African-American and Hispanic professionals attracting celebrities, athletes, actresses and everyday people looking for love.

Madame Noire: How did you end up in matchmaking?

Jasmine Diaz: I have been calling myself a matchmaker since the beginning of time. I was matching people in high school — some are still together. That was really my introduction to the industry. I was working in the entertainment industry for about 12 years and during that time I was married, but had a lot of single friends. I had a lot of friends saying, “I’m single, I can’t find a really good guy. Do you know anyone who’s single?” I’m pretty connected so I happened to know a couple of friends that were.

I just decided, “Let me connect these people, because they’re obviously looking for the same things.” It was less for business, more for personal reasons — connecting friends and hoping they’d find a match.  I decided to take a leap of faith and start the Shawn Mackenzi Agency. Since then I’ve been moving full speed ahead as a matchmaker.

MN: Where did the name Shawn Mackenzi come from?

JD: It doesn’t have a special meaning per se. I wanted the company to be a boutique company that is really specialized and exclusive. I was really scouring for the right identity so to speak. Me as a matchmaker, I call myself Shawn. When I was thinking of the company name, I wanted something that was ambiguous, but didn’t scream matchmaker. My mother and I were looking at a baby book believe it or not. We came across the names Shawn and Mackenzi and thought it was something that sounded great together.

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When you’re single, you get set up left and right. Simply the words, “I’m single” get your friends’ and acquaintances’ brains turning with every other single person they know, wondering if you’re a fit. And, since set ups can be exhausting; you have to learn to be just as selective about your matchmakers, as you are about your matches. Before accepting that number or handing yours over to your well-meaning Cupid Hopeful, make sure they actually have what it takes to find you a good match.

GumBumper

Your best friend has been with their significant other for a few years. You have more faith in their love than you do Will and Jada’s – that’s how enchanting their passion is. And yet, they break up; stating that things hadn’t been working out between them for some time. You love them both, and feel as if you are their child that has been caught in this break-up. Who do you go with? Of course you want to stay with your best friend because according to Part 2 of Section 1 of the Best Friend Guide (if only it really existed), loyalty overrides everything. But you have grown to love their ex (in a friendly way of course) just as much, and don’t think it’s fair to cut them off completely as you’ve grown to be cool. You are probably feeling more hung up than a dial tone.

The first thing you should remember in this situation is that you don’t have to choose who you remain friends with. Neutrality is your best policy here. Okay, so he cheated and she caught him (or the other way around) and now there is this whole drama that is worthy of a segment on “Maury.” As much as you may feel for your girlfriend, this is her situation — not yours. What she (or he) chooses to do to deal with the obstacles that arose in their relationship should have no bearings on your personal actions. I am sure that you were friends with both people because of their individual traits, not just their image as a couple. There is no reason why their behavior within the private confines of their relationship should upset that (except in extreme cases of explosive secrets and abuse, of course).

But, keep in mind that just because you may remain friends with both parties does not mean that you need to be playing telephone with them. You spoke to him, and he has confided in you that he is contemplating getting back out on the dating scene to forget everything (as men tend to do). Is it really your place to go and tell her that? Absolutely not. Don’t be that puppy who runs from one fence to another with different tidbits. If he wants her to know that, I am sure he will find a way to tell her. And ladies, we know she’ll probably find out sooner or later about his actions from someone else or those good ole trackers known as Facebook and Twitter. If you know that you tend to suffer from what I like to call, “diarrhea of the mouth” aka loose lips, refrain from speaking about the situation to both of your friends. Let them know that as much as you love and support them, this break up is not a topic you wish to discuss, nor do you want to talk about the many problems they think the other person has forever and ever.

Most importantly, do remember that it is not your job to make sure your favorite couple gets back together. Sometimes we hold our friends’ relationships on a pedestal making them the templates we want to base our own relationships on. And sometimes we just think we know what’s better for a person than they know for themselves (“You guys have been together for __ years, that’s a LONG time. You should work it out!”). We should use healthy relationships as inspiration, but we should always know a pretty picture takes a lot of work. At the end of the day, your friends know, more than anyone else, why they had to withdraw from their union. Therefore, it is not your job to play matchmaker. You are not VH1 or the dude from “The Bachelor”; it is not your task to help them find their way to one another. Be a good friend to both, give them each a shoulder to cry on (maybe even a Kleenex) and then slowly but surely, find a way to start talking about something else…

More on Madame Noire!

• Did You Know They Dated? 10 Secret Lovers, Temporary Boos and Flings We Were Surprised By
• Let Me Get You Straight, Girl! Advice To The Real ‘Housewives’ Of Atlanta!
• When It Comes To Failed Marriages, Perhaps Expecting A Fairy Tale Is The Problem
• First Date, First Impression: Is It Really You?
• MN Exclusive: Jenifer Lewis On Her Favorite Role, Longevity & Playing The Momma
• Listen Up Fellas! 7 Signs SHE’s Just Not That Into You
• The Business Of Our Periods: Why Are Feminine Products So Darn Expensive?

In elementary school it was making sure you tagged the boy you like, and not in the Facebook way.  In middle school, you may have sent a note with, “Do you like me? Check yes or no.  By the time high school rolled around you found yourself fighting the fear that you wouldn’t receive a candy-gram from a secret admirer.  You may not know it, but you’ve been flirting since you were playing Duck Duck Goose.

Though, as an adult you may find that flirtation grazes a fine line between bold and aggressive and passive and timid.  With the confidence that comes from your experiences as a woman, you probably know by now what you want, but may be still unsure of exactly how to get it.  For example, you’re at the bar with your girls at Happy Hour when you spot a tall glass of Hot. You may not want to straddle the bar while lip-synching Rihanna’s “S&M”, but you also don’t want to shy away into the shadows by the bathroom and hope he’ll notice you at some point during the night.  (He’ll have to go to the bathroom eventually, right?)

What can you do so that you appear interested but not thirsty?  The list below can help you get his attention without getting on his nerves.

Read the rest of this entry »

by Andrea Williams

There are absolutely no guarantees in the world of entrepreneurship but, according to the most basic of business strategies, filling an unmet need in any industry is as close to a guarantee of success as one could hope to get.

For OneDegreeFrom.Me founder Paul Carrick Brunson, developing a matchmaking and relationship coaching company that caters specifically to the young African American professional, a segment of the population that has been all but ignored by other firms, has placed him on the business-building fast track.

The seed for OneDegreeFrom.Me was first planted when Brunson worked with more than 100 at-risk youth at a summer camp sponsored by the L10 Project, a nonprofit organization that he founded to address academic achievement gaps through school revitalization projects in the U.S. and the Caribbean.  During the camp, he noticed a disturbing commonality among the students.

“Out of those 100 kids, not one had two parents in the home,” Brunson said.  “I saw how it impacted them psychologically and socially, and I went to my wife and said, ‘Let’s try to do something’.”

Fueled by a desire to help a few locals find Mr. or Mrs. Right while simultaneously addressing a major societal ill, Brunson began by hosting dinner parties/mixers in his home for single friends.  After a string of successful gatherings, he decided to attend a conference that brought together hundreds of matchmakers and life coaches from around the world.

“When I decided to go to that conference, that’s when it all came into full picture for me,” Brunson said.  “I was sitting at the conference, there were 250 people from around the world, and I was the only person under the age of 40.  I was the only male.  I was the only one that was not white or Asian.  And I realized that there was a huge opportunity for me.”

Fast forward through 12 months of extensive study about all things love and relationships, including reading more than 100 books, becoming a certified life coach and serving as an apprentice under New York Times bestselling author and matchmaker extraordinaire Rachel Greenwald, and Brunson was ready for the launch of OneDegreeFrom.Me in October of 2009.

But before he could officially hang his shingle, Brunson faced staunch criticism from those close to him who couldn’t understand why he would trade in a cushy (and very well-paying) gig as an international investment banker to play cupid for a bunch of unlucky-in-love singles.

“It was definitely daunting going in,” Brunson said.  “But I realized that because there was no one in the marketplace, because no one had ever been in the marketplace and because the community didn’t fully embrace or understand what matchmaking was all about, I had the opportunity to come in and set the record straight.  I could basically create the market and teach the value of what we were offering.”

(NBC) — How did you end up in the matchmaking business? I actually started out in finance, managing money for a wealth family in Turkey. Because of that job I had the opportunity to travel all over the world and what I always noticed is that no matter where I was the conversation would switch to two things: sports and relationships. It fascinated me that no matter where I was the topic of relationships was always poignant.

What made you quit a lucrative business like finance and jump into matchmaking? I was actually helping out with a summer program for African-American and Latino students when I noticed that all of them, every one had come from a single-parent home. It effected them emotionally, mentally and sometimes physically. I stared reading books about relationships, family and my culture. It made me realize how important a child’s foundation is. After the program ended, my wife and I had this idea to invite all of our single friends in the D.M.V. to our house and it kind of took off from there.

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