All Articles Tagged "marriage and money"
Money. It causes more fights than household chores and is often cited as one of the main causes of divorce. At its least harmful, it can lead to minor arguments and bickering. At its worst, it is on a par with infidelity, causing a breakdown in trust, growing resentment and sometimes irreversible damage. More specifically, the spending and saving of money is the root of most financial issues. Don’t let money ruin your relationship. Check out these 7 tips of how to ward off financial drama.
(New York Times) — 1. It’s almost impossible to underestimate money’s role. Arguments about money, whatever they may be, often lead to divorce. There’s no question that a relationship is better when the financial side of life is stable, both people know what’s going on and work together to make decisions. So we shouldn’t ignore money in our relationship discussions.
2. We all come with baggage. One big challenge is that each spouse brings a set of deeply ingrained beliefs, habits and feelings about money. Most of us were raised in families where money (and religion and politics) were subjects not to be discussed in polite company. As a result, we have very little trainingon how to talk about and deal with the emotional issues that are inherent to our financial lives.
(Huffington Post) — It probably comes as no surprise that money troubles often lead to marital strife. But could receiving government assistance such as food stamps, Medicaid or welfare do further harm to your marriage? The answer is yes–and in a big way, according to Dr. David Schramm, a researcher and professor at the University of Missouri. In a study released earlier this month, Dr. Schramm found that, among couples in the same income bracket, those receiving government assistance experience lower rates of positive bonding, commitment to their spouses and overall satisfaction in their marriages. They are also more prone to divorce, negative interaction and feeling trapped in their marriages.
(TheLoop21) — It’s a common belief that opposites attract. An introvert may find love in a free-spirited soul while a night owl may fixate on an early bird. But does this theory work effectively when addressing household finances with a spouse? Will and Jada-Pinkett Smith may or may not be the people to consult on this, but there are formulas that work for couples.
(Businessweek) — For all those same-sex newlyweds in New York, Lawrence S. Jacobs has a message: Enjoy the Champagne and the honeymoon, but expect no gifts from the IRS. Jacobs, a lawyer in Washington, specializes in estate planning for same-sex couples—and in delivering the bad news that their unions aren’t legal in the eyes of the IRS, a policy that will cost them time and money during tax season. Same-sex couples in Washington, which last year legalized gay marriage, must fill out a federal return to make calculations required for their D.C. joint return. But then they must set that work aside and fill out separate federal returns because the IRS doesn’t regard their union as legal, Jacobs says. “You just spent decades getting your marriage recognized, and now the feds say, ‘No, you’re not,’” says Jacobs, who as a partner in a same-sex marriage has firsthand experience of the problem.
(Wall Street Journal) — The Internal Revenue Service is giving some relief to “innocent spouses” who otherwise may have been liable for a partner’s tax debt. Effective immediately, the agency has eliminated a rule that disqualifies taxpayers from innocent-spouse status if they fail to file for relief within two years—a provision that snagged people who otherwise qualified, including abused women. ”Today’s change will help innocent spouses victimized in the past, present and future,” said IRS Commissioner Doug Shulman.
(Christian Science Monitor) — 1. Know your partner’s spending habits. Once you decide you’re getting married, find out how your future spouse will treat money. A free spender before marriage will probably be a free spender after marriage. Ask about their regular indulgences. Reveal everything in your respective financial closets. Be honest about your income, debts, and money problems. Bring out your bank statements from the past 12 months to show what you did with your money. Explain your strengths and weaknesses with money. Admit if you are a spender or a saver. If your partner has been married before, find out about his or her financial obligations to the ex-spouse and children.
(Bankrate) — Is your spouse cheating on you with money? Maybe. Have you noticed a few dead presidents missing from your wallet or purse lately? A growing number of checks cashed at the grocery store for more than the purchase amount? An unexplained drain on your 401(k) or home equity line of credit? Time to wake up and smell the latte, says Ruth Hayden, a Minnesota-based financial consultant, educator and author of “Your Money Life: The ‘Make-It-Work’ Workbook.” As a financial counselor for many years, she’s seen it all. ”The major warning sign is when you can’t have a reasonable conversation about money,” says Hayden. “He or she feels defensive or accusatory, which means he or she has something they’re hiding. If it gets a little bigger than that, he or she is able to buy stuff and you can’t explain how they can afford it.”
(Daily Finance) — When my ex-husband lost his job, I thought I was being kind by telling him not to worry about it. Apparently, this translated in his mind as “Your job never really mattered anyway” — not my intention, nor my best move. And, that was before the economy tanked. Apparently,couples arguing about money is on the rise. In an American Express (AXP) study, 61% of consumers admitted to argumentative discussions about household budgets — up 17% year over year. Few things affect the household dynamic and tenor of financial discussions more than losing your job. And, if you’re not married, apparently you should leave the word “jobless” off your online dating profile. Jobs matter in relationships, and the lack of one can even preclude them, as highlighted by a new survey this month indicatingthree out of four women wouldn’t marry someone unemployed. Marriage is an economic union, and the deal terms just don’t look favorable when one partner’s cash flow goes to zero.
(Huffington Post) — When Penn State sociology professors Paul Amatoand Brett Beattie began studying the repercussions of unemployment on marriage in the aftermath of the Great Recession, they expected to find that joblessness destabilizes marriage. But, after analyzing data from all 50 states between 1960 and 2005, Amato and Beattie were surprised. Prior to 1980, when unemployment numbers spiked, divorce followed suit. But, since the 1980s, when unemployment rates have risen, divorce rates have dropped. In March 2007, before the bubble burst, 4.6 percent of the labor force was unemployed, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Three years later, the unemployment rate jumped to 10.2 percent. Divorce, on the other hand, decreased by 1.4 percent between 2007 and 2008, according to the report, and then by another 2.8 percent between 2008 and 2009.