All Articles Tagged "love"

Elitist Dating App Receives $2.1M Investment For Curated Singles

January 28th, 2015 - By Lauren R.D. Fox
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In efforts to bypass the “peasants,” and head straight for the potential kings of the world, Amanda Bradford has created a new app a la Tinder named, The League. The purpose of The League is to only have a “curated” selective group of singles to mingle with one another.

For singles to join, they must go through an application process and wait from approval from the administration. Instead of using social media sites like Facebook or Twitter to pull information about their selected singles, The League heads straight to LinkedIn. Its community is made up of lawyers, doctors and tech executives.

In an interview with Business Insider, Bradford revealed:

“The best universities curate students. Employers curate their employees. Work and school are the top places where 20-somethings meet each other. So it makes sense for a dating community [as well.]”

Although the app is in beta form and has 4,500 San Francisco-based users, reports Time, it has received $2.1 million from investors. Bradford told Tech Crunch, “I was just going to raise a small seed round, but we had a bunch of interest and we went from $500,000 to $2.1 million almost overnight.”

Business Insider notes the singles who are accepted into The League do not have to be Ivy League graduates or work at prominent corporations but must have done something phenomenal in their millennial age group.

To download The League, you must have an iPhone. What do you think of this service?

Dishes, Chivalry and Other Things We Wish Men Knew Were Major Turn-Ons

January 22nd, 2015 - By Meg Butler
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Image Source: Shutterstock


Everybody likes to get physical, but some guys can be clueless when it comes to foreplay outside of the bedroom.

Would You Get Married At Starbucks?

January 22nd, 2015 - By Madame Noire
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From StyleBlazer

Just when you thought you’ve seen enough Starbucks cups on your Instagram timeline…
It appears that America’s hipster alternative to Dunkin Donuts is also the perfect place to begin or end a wedding day. Yes folks, #StarbucksWedding is officially a thing.

As reported by Grazia Daily:
One couple took it a step further and actually took their vows inside a branch of the famous chain. DeAnna Dodson, 31, and Jordan Senz, 32, of Janesville, Wisconsin wed in a Starbucks on New Year’s Eve and their vows included the statements: “I promise to love you a latte” and “I want to macchiato an honest woman out of you.”

Now, in the plethora of odd places to get married or celebrate one’s wedding, a coffee shop is not the worst. But something does seem cheesy about standing in line during midday rush to get your #WeddingLatte.

Read more about Starbucks Weddings at StyleBlazer.com

Would You Hire A Bridesmaid?

January 16th, 2015 - By Lauren R.D. Fox
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Hire A Bridesmaid

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Would you hire a bridesmaid?

Before, you give a quick response, let’s talk about the person who created this new career path. After being a bridesmaid at many weddings and observing the stress that came along with planning a wedding, Jen Glatz posted a CraigsList advertisement for people to hire her as a bridesmaid. The response to her ad was overwhelming and thus inspired her business, Bridesmaid For Hire.

Based on the bride’s budget and needs, Glatz and her team create a package that would be suitable. There are four packages to create from:

Virtual Bridesmaid™
Includes 1:1 consultation sessions, via our online video
collaboration tool, to assist with planning, problem solving,
and putting together itineraries and to-do lists.

Undercover Bridesmaid™
Are you a Maid of Honor or a Bride-to-be who needs some
behind the scenes help? We’ll be there for you with weekly sessions,
via our online video collaboration tool, to assist in the ongoing planning
and facilitating of events and activities leading up-to the wedding.

Ultimate Bridesmaid™
Includes everything listed in the ‘Undercover
Bridesmaid’ package, plus in-person ground support
at pre-wedding events & the day of the wedding.

Bridesmaid by Your Side.™
Includes everything listed in the ‘Undercover
Bridesmaid’ package, plus actual participation as
a bridesmaid or maid-of-honor in the wedding party.

When asked if they would hire a bridesmaid, many said there was no reason to because they have committed friends and family members. Although, the Bridesmaid For Hire’s FAQ page tells a very different story which some of us have unfortunately witnessed:

Weddings are expensive for friends and family. For many, it requires traveling hundreds of miles to attend engagement parties, showers, and the actual day itself. If you’re in the bridal party, it often requires a big commitment in time and energy. While you may want to have specific friends and family as part of your “big day” they may not be able to fly across the country to help you shop for a dress, know where to start when it comes to planning your bridal shower, or have the evenings open to chat on the phone about what’s on your to-do list that week and the wedding challenges and roadblocks you’re knocking into. By hiring a Professional Bridesmaid, you can still honor your friends and family by having them be your bridesmaids, but without the burden or the “dirty work”. The Professional Bridesmaid does all the heavy lifting – so you and your girls can focus on the fun!

Glatz also serves as the bride’s assistant instead of being a wedding planner. By focusing on the needs of the bride and helping her pick out a wedding dress or honeymoon lingerie, Glatz’s mission is to make the bride  feel comfortable with her wedding day choices. Glatz and her team’s prices start at $199 and can climb to over $1100, and they are also offering job opportunities to those who want to become a professional bridesmaids.

Do you think you have what it takes? Check out the video segment of Bridesmaid For Hire, below.

 

“I Don’t Talk Like I’m From The Ghetto”: How Does Class Affect Relationships?

January 13th, 2015 - By Lauren R.D. Fox
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Class System Affect Relationships

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Growing up and dating in New York City means I don’t usually have to explain my Judeo-Christian Caribbean heritage, which makes things easier to be with a compatible partner. Despite this, one can still find differences with a partner even if they are of the same nationality. On the issue, The Guardian reports:

“If anything, people are more likely than ever to marry into their own class, as a report from the Institute for Public Policy Research showed this year. Of people born in 1958, just over a third of women had a partner from the same class as themselves: 38% married up, while 23% married down. For those born in 1970, 45% married into the same class; of those born between 1976 and 1981, 56% married into the same class, with a far smaller proportion (16%) marrying up. Even the phrases “marrying up” and “marrying down” are sullying to use. You can’t really escape the connotation that the rich are better than the poor.”

In a recent study by The Cut, a focus group of 11 couples shared how they managed through the American class system. Whether their parents are immigrants or country club regulars, The Cut explores how race, wealth, religion and education affect these relationships. Here are a couple of highlights from their study:

She could afford all of this without me.
“When you’re black, it’s an inescapable truth, a full-body experience that’s happening all the time,” says Jack, 35. He says Jill, 35, his wife, who is white, talks about race by “trying to weave it into a higher morality.” He laughs: “I’m just trying to survive! She champions equality!”

Jill comes from a low-income family while Jack’s is middle class. Jill, like her mother, is the breadwinner. “It wasn’t weird to me that he didn’t have much money, and I was used to roles outside gender norms,” she says. “And neither of us grew up taking vacations.”

She paid the down payment on their house, which is in her name. “The house was my first choice, not his, and I’m sure some part of me was like, ‘It’s my money,’” Jill says. Jack adds, “There’s a 10 percent ping in my heart that she could afford all of this without me and I couldn’t afford any of it without her, but I pay half the mortgage.” She makes more money working via satellite from home than he makes working overnight in a warehouse. He gets frustrated when he returns to dishes in the sink. “She’s been home all day! I hate to say this, but I think she thinks earning more alleviates her of chores.”

He sees brown skin and thinks I’m a traitor.
“Some people are rough around the edges — he’s just rough,” Eva, 37, says of her boyfriend, Marcus, 36, who emigrated from Africa as a toddler and grew up in the projects and in foster care. She grew up in a middle-class family in a British colony, attending good schools and sneaking off to go swimming. When he went outside as a kid “he risked being shot,” and he doesn’t have any family. Eva and Marcus graduated from the same American college but at different times and met in a club in New York.

“I’m half-black, half-Portuguese,” Eva says. “I have a British accent. I don’t understand the way Americans view race. Some black people say I’m bougie and I’m acting white, but to me skin color doesn’t matter — I come from a beautiful island with British manners! This is just how I act. One day, Marcus said, ‘You get along so well with white people.’ I said, ‘What do you mean? I get along well with all people.’ … He feels insecure sometimes. I’m not from the ghetto, so I don’t talk like I’m from the ghetto — that doesn’t mean I think I’m better than someone else. He sees brown skin and thinks I’m a traitor.”

Talking with him about his childhood helps her understand his anger. She says, “It took breaking down the barriers. I’ve learned from him not to prejudge.” Both Marcus and Eva are in New York to launch businesses. “We share a common goal. He loves talking about the future,” she says. “His big aspiration is to raise kids the way I was raised.”

To read more on how class affects modern day love, click here.

Petition Filed Against TLC’s New Show “My Husband Is Not Gay”

January 8th, 2015 - By Lauren R.D. Fox
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In true TLC fashion, the television network is set to release their new series My Husband Is Not Gay this upcoming Sunday. Known for documenting cultural phenomenon or behavior people don’t usually like to associate with, TLC draws their audience in through uncomfortable ideas or controversial people and revealing how they still fit into the societal norm. My Husband Is Not Gay will cover four Mormon men from Utah (three are married and one is casually dating) who have relationships with women but are attracted to men. These men do not identify with being gay or bisexual.

Cosmopolitan says that although the basis of My Husband Is Not Gay is controversial, the lifestyle these men choose is all too common in the United States:

“Whether it’s thanks to societal pressures, religious pressures, a desire for “normalcy” and a “conventional” lifestyle, simply not wanting to be gay, or a whole host of other possible reasons, gay men have been getting married — to women — for a very long time. (And for that matter, gay women have also been marrying straight men.) There are listicles of gay celebrities who’d previously dated and/or married woman all over the Internet; from either spouse’s perspective, stories of the often-broken marriages that follow such couplings are very common across tabloid newspapers, airport newsstand memoirs, and personal blogs.”

There is a petition to stop the show from premiering. Found on Change.org, the petition states:

This January, TLC will debut “My Husband’s Not Gay,” a TV show that promotes the false and dangerous idea that gay people can and should choose to be straight in order to be part of their faith communities. As a gay Christian man who’s seen first hand how this message can harm people, I am calling on TLC to cancel “My Husband’s Not Gay” and to stop telling America that LGBT people should lie to themselves and to their faith communities about who they are and who they love. As a devout Christian, I understand the important role faith plays in the lives of the show’s main characters. It was made very clear to me by the conservative community I grew up in that being gay was considered “unnatural” and “an abomination.” So I, too, did everything possible to hide who I am. I was even subjected to six months of so-called “reparative therapy,” a discredited and dangerous practice that falsely claims to turn gay people straight. I was promised I could change, and told that I should “pray the gay away.” But I quickly learned the very real harms of “reparative therapy” – a practice that’s been denounced as ineffective and dangerous by nearly every major medical authority. In the end, the only thing that this so-called “therapy” did was stoke a growing despair that maybe my life wasn’t worth living. The men featured in this show deserve to be shown compassion and acceptance. Perhaps even more importantly, TV viewers need to know the horrific consequences of trying to change who you are. Instead, TLC is presenting victims’ lives as entertainment, while sending the message that being gay is something that can and ought to be changed, or that you should reject your sexual orientation by marrying someone of the opposite sex. This message is harmful to both LGBT people and communities of faith, and I call upon TLC to stop spreading such dangerous misinformation by cancelling “My Husband’s Not Gay” immediately.

So far, the petition has received 96,466 signatures; Arlene Ausich from California shared her reasoning for signing the petition by highlighting the suicide of a transgender teen girl Leelah:

“As if the recent suicide of Leelah isn’t enough to prove how damaging it is to endure a lack of support for and acceptance of who you are, let’s add a tv series to the mix. Enough is enough! It’s a downright travesty that the human race is no further from our conservative & restrictive thinking (first {and still} African Americans, then women, now LGBT..) that a show like this would even be considered for air. TLC has lost at least one viewer.”

Do you believe My Husband Is Not Gay will further promote intolerance against the LGBTQ community?

Have You Heard Of The New Side Chick (And Could You Be Her)?

January 7th, 2015 - By Meg Butler
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Have you heard of “the new side chick“? Just because there’s no other woman doesn’t mean you’re his number one. If your relationship sounds anything like this, you could be a side chick without even knowing it.

The Truth About Happy Couples: Do You And Your Boo Make The Cut?

January 6th, 2015 - By Meg Butler
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Is there a formula for love? Scientists say that if you want to know if you two have what it takes for the long haul, all you have to do is look at the numbers. When it comes to fighting, loving and spending these are the signs that you’re doing it right.

“Good Morning Texts Count” Men Reflect On How To Keep Women Happy In Relationships

December 26th, 2014 - By Madame Noire
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Image Source: Shutterstock.com

Image Source: Shutterstock.com

From Single Black Male

At this point I am less than a week from my 26th birthday. 25 was a fun year, a progress year. I expect 26 to be more of the same just with some bigger moves to be made. It was my own bright idea to share with my SBM family some thoughts I have and lessons I’ve learned as I begin to enter my 26th year on this here earth. Consider it my last piece of coherent writing prior to Hennypalooza this Saturday, as that is my birthday as well. Check out the following let me know of your own lessons you’ve learned about the opposite sex as you’ve aged:
Men and women are inherently different.

I’ve accepted that men and women will speak different languages on some things. It makes no sense to really be angered by this anymore. I accept how we can be different, I try to be understanding of it all.
Nice guys sort of finish last.

Nice guys really don’t finish last. There’s someone out there for everyone. Someone will dig most aspects about who you are. It can take a while, it can take a long while. These things don’t run on our time. In between relationships, you owe it to yourself to put your energy into bettering yourself and your situation. That positive energy will be rewarded at one time or another. But what won’t be rewarded is bitching about nice guys finishing last. If you run the same play and the defense has figured it out, change the play. It’s that simple.
Good morning texts count.

Now I don’t think the success of your relationship hinges on your ability to send timely good morning text. I do think that good morning texts help. In my early twenties I was horrible at sending those things. I’d get an earful sometimes because someone might not hear from me til maybe 2 p.m. That was just how I was back then. I’m sort of the same way now. I wake up and immediately start getting breakfast,freshening up and getting ready for my day. Many times I’m not really texting anyone. As I got older I used the morning commute to send my good morning text. It’s a nice gesture that she’ll appreciate. It doesn’t hurt, if you can do it make sure that you do.

Read more about women, men and their differences at SingleBlackMale.com

The Real Reason You Can’t Move On From Your Ex

December 25th, 2014 - By Madame Noire
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From Single Black Male

The other day I had a conversation with a close friend and the topic of conversation came up of whether you ever move on from your ex. Not the ex that was a dirtbag but the exes that you have that you really cared about. I told her in summary that you really don’t move on from that experience what you do is you accept that you are no longer together.

That doesn’t mean that you always hope that you get back together one day. What it means is that when you care about someone you don’t lose those feelings. You can’t move past it all you can do is accept the circumstance. There’s growth in that realization. That’s the growth that you need to be able to encounter new people and accept the challenge that comes with a new mate.

I think at times we’re so obsessed with moving on that we haven’t figured out that moving on is not required. What you should want to take away from a situation is that you learned something about yourself and about that relationship. You may have learned what you like in a significant other or what you don’t like but you’re willing to tolerate.

I’ll always tell people that I will never regret about 99% of the people I’ve dated because if I did I would have to conclude that I don’t know how to pick them. What I know is that I have tried and sometimes it didn’t work out. I didn’t move on; treating each relationship in my life like a ball game doesn’t sound right. I take all that with me as I move forward. Some people call it baggage and I don’t think it qualifies as baggage unless you only take away the negative. I take away all the positives that come with a relationship ending and the potential of a new one beginning.

That’s important because failure is what scares us the most. It makes us stay in situations way too long and it sometimes relegates us in situations that we should never be a partied to. I have struggled with that myself in relationships, do I stay or do I leave? It’s a question that I grapple with all the time.

Read more about why you should move on from past relationships at SingleBlackMale.org