All Articles Tagged "Living"
Do you ever look back at your college years and your twenties and feel like you dodged a bullet? Let’s be honest: an entire machine gun full of bullets! Here are a few things you’re probably so happy you didn’t do in love when you were young.
Having a guy over for the first time? If you really want to give him an accurate impression of who you are, leave your home exactly as it is OR…keep in mind what he thinks when he sees these things. It could be nice to at least start with a good impression.
You don’t have to worry about the clock ticking if you’re busy getting it together. If you need a few tips to get a head start, though, here are some things every woman should know by 30.
How To Let Her Guard Down
We all know someone who grew old without letting the bitterness go. Opening yourself up and taking risks (in love and in life) is the only way to move forward.
Women can’t compartmentalize their friendships: either everybody has to get along in every situation, or somebody gets the boot. Men sort of pick and choose friends, tailoring the relationships the way they see fit. Here are 14 reasons women end friendships that men never would.
Give us some credit: we can be understanding about most things. But there are some behaviors that make the blood of even the coolest girlfriends boil.
For many of us, the missing ingredient to achieving our goals and making our dreams come true isn’t that we lack the ability, capacity or the opportunity. Many times, the problem is a lack of patience.
Here are ways we can actively work to build patience into our lives:
1. Count the Costs: Impatience has a price—and most times, it’s not worth what we pay. Until we examine the impact of our past actions, we won’t change.
2. Practice Daily Quiet Time: Practicing daily quiet time will produce results, clarity and focus. When we slow ourselves down, we actually speed up the process of holistic success. Sometimes we go hard, because we don’t want to hear what our hearts and lives are telling us. We have to pump the brakes if we want to slow overwhelm and get to real living!
3. Get Manual: Patience has to be built into our personal culture—especially since we lean so heavily on technology for convenience and speed. Try doing small things like actually learning a phone number and dialing it rather than relying on speed dial. Pull out a cookbook and make a meal that takes time. These are small, but important things that help us slow down and actually be present with our actions. Take time to think and enjoy!
Coach Felicia continues to break our lives down to help us build them back up and you can read more over on ESSENCE.com.
When it comes to men, there are some who think they’ve got women all figured out and that they know us even better than we know ourselves. Naturally, with that type of mindset plenty of misconceptions run wild and end up being spewed around as truth. Here are 14 misconceptions men have about women that we’re here to clean up.
There is simply no reason to marry young today. Got knocked up? Fine. Nobody bats an eyelash at single parents today, or unmarried parents. Shoot, most Swedish men and women have children and never marry.
You want financial stability? You don’t need a husband: you need a therapist to help you understand why you’re afraid of pursuing your dreams. It’s the year 2014! You’re allowed to — and should – get your own two feet on the ground before letting someone sweep you off them. Not convinced? Here are 14 reasons you absolutely should not marry young.
Recently we published a piece listing signs that you might struggle with accepting love. We don’t want to write about a problem without offering a solution, so here are 14 ways to learn to accept love!
It was 1:30 in the afternoon, a time when perfectly sane people are hard at work, but that only partially described me. I was wholly crazed and wild-eyed, tussling with pages and pages of research I’d compiled for a paper I was writing in my pursuit of a master’s degree in African-American studies. My professor was a short, stoic Ghanaian man—I could only recall seeing him smile once and even that was more of a grimace of politeness than genuine glee—and he made one thing clear: anybody who didn’t have the project on his desk by 4 p.m. could forget about getting any kind of grade, much less that desirable first letter of the alphabet.
He’d explained the details of the assignment a good three weeks before it was due and I’d jotted copious notes to reference when I was ready to get started. The latter proved much harder than the former. I piddled away those 21-odd days leading up to the big deadline doing only heavens knows what when I could’ve been working incrementally towards getting ‘er done and done thoughtfully, carefully and introspectively. That would’ve been too much like right.
Instead, I found myself pounding out the first marginally coherent thoughts that came to mind a day and a half beforehand in order to make page count. Later for impressing him with my grasp of information and personal insight. For a little more than 24 hours, I couldn’t sleep, I barely ate, I didn’t set foot in a shower and—I ain’t too ashamed to admit it—I wasn’t even thinking about swishing a brush around the inside of my mouth. Every minute was emblazoned with urgency and none could be spared for the sake of self-care and hygiene.
When I had finally scratched out something resembling a finished product, I burned up the highway in what I slept in, hair sprazzled around my head like cactus spines, and made it to his door at 3:48. He wasn’t even there.
I am a perfector of that most classic form of self-sabotage—procrastination. It’s been a cemented hurdle in my academic career before it crept up in my professional career, and it’s one of the few things that’s regularly made me curse my own fool self out. If tradition had its way this New Year’s Eve, I would’ve been sprawled across the living room floor with some colored Sharpies and a piece of white poster board, scrawling out a detailed list of goals to accomplish before it was time to perform the ritual again next December. That wasn’t the move for 2014.
Read more New Year’s resolutions at Essence.com