All Articles Tagged "life"
There is really something to be said for knowing when to humble yourself and be quiet. It is clear, however, that Conrad Murray has not learned that lesson.
In his first interview since being released from prison, Conrad Murray opens up to The Daily Mail about life with Michael Jackson. He says things got very crazy towards the end, but he was not responsible:
“He was in crisis at the end of his life, filled with panic and misery … By the end, Michael Jackson was a broken man. I tried to protect him but instead I was brought down with him.”
Murray says MJ was so paranoid that he wouldn’t allow housekeepers to clean his underwear because he thought they would sell them. Yes, well, drugs will make you think a lot of things that would rarely cross your mind if you were sober.
Murray says that he was only trying to protect Michael but was taken down with him. In fact, he says they were very close friends. How close, ask?
I held his private part every night to fit a catheter because he was incontinent at night.”
Yeah. Moving on.
In the end, Conrad Murray says he didn’t kill Michael Jackson but rather, Michael accidentally killed himself.
You know, the only real truth is that no one will ever know what really happened. It’s no secret that Michael had bouts of paranoia. But we also know that Conrad Murray isn’t the most trustworthy person.
No matter the “truth,” it is about time for everyone to stop doing interviews about this and keep whatever they know to themselves.
Well, this was the moment all of the Beyoncé fans and stans had been waiting on for months. The moment when another full song would be released. It finally happened on Friday and now the question is, does it live up to the hype?
We gave you a short clip of Beyoncé’s “God Made You Beautiful” last month and from that sneak peek, many of you weren’t too impressed. But with the Life is But A Dream documentary set to be released in days, it seems her team decided it was okay to let the one new song featured on the dvd “leak” to the masses.
In “God Made You Beautiful,” Bey talks not only about the moment Blue was born, but also what life has been like and how she’s changed Beyoncé since being born”
You were bought into my life
I kiss those little feet and watch for your perfect smile
and when it comes the world stops in your eyes
I found love, I found peace of the purest kind
It is alleged that Bey wrote the song herself because, hey, who knows this particular experience better than her? The lyrics are nice and there are some nice harmonies, but overall, it seems like it’s missing that special “something.” Maybe it’s just me.
As a matter of fact, who cares what I think! The bigger question is to you…pass or play?
Mistakes are defined as mishaps, failures, blunders or carelessness. Mistakes are also seen as regrets for something said or done that is often looked upon in a negative light. They are often looked upon in a negative light because when a mistake is made people believe that the actions taken or the thought process in which a mishap occurred was or is due to a lack of knowledge concerning a particular situation. While many people may believe that mistakes are something to be viewed through a negative lens, I for one believe that mistakes should be valued and appreciated. Why? For a number of reasons.
For one, you learn from them. The knowledge you lacked before making a particular decision or going in a certain direction is the knowledge you gain after making a wrong choice, turn, etc. How do you gain that knowledge? By reevaluating your decision, examining what you did wrong, and remembering what not to do in the future. The only way you can learn from your mistakes and learn to appreciate them is if you learn from them and apply the lessons throughout your life.
They should also be appreciated because as you are making your mistakes and learning from them, you are growing as a person. Everyone aspires to be a better person in some way, shape, form or fashion, and the only way a person can improve themselves is by experiencing a learning process. What better learning process is there to experience than making mistakes to improve your knowledge in life and decision making?
The last reason life’s mistakes should be appreciated is because you can share your experience with someone else to help them learn and grow in the direction in which they should. We don’t go through life just to live and make mistakes to keep them to ourselves, but we go through life making the mistakes we make to improve ourselves and to help someone else along the way. How many times have you been in a situation where you made a bad decision and you felt as though you were the only person who had done so? And when you discovered that someone else went through the same or similar thing you went through, how did that make you feel? Sharing the mistakes you made/make in life with someone else will help them see and know that they are not alone and will empower them to do better.
As you continue to live the life you were blessed to live, you will continue to make mistakes. However, you should remember that making mistakes is a part of who you are, and the lessons you learn from them is a part of the journey that makes you the person you were meant to be. Many people say that you shouldn’t dwell on life’s mistakes, which is true, but you shouldn’t ignore them either. Don’t go through life making mistakes, shrugging them off and not taking knowledge away from them, for every mistake you make is not a foolish one and even then the mistakes you may deem foolish have a lesson behind them. You need your mistakes and someone else needs you to make them. Appreciate and embrace each misstep you make, for it is a closer step you take to being the best person you can be.
Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin.
Writer Seth Adam Smith has published one of the most controversial blog posts to hit the internet in months and he’s likely about to become really famous because of it.
Smith published “Marriage Isn’t For You” on his blog six days ago and in that time, the post has received over 24 million views. In his piece, Seth, who has been married for a year and a half, revealed that he’d come to the conclusion that marriage simply wasn’t for him.
Like many other engaged people, Smith started having some doubts about whether or not he was actually ready to take that next step in his relationship with his now wife, Kim. He sat with his father and his dad gave him some shocking advice:
With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”
Smith says his wife showed true selflessness a few months ago when they were going through a rough patch. Those hard times made him react in a very selfish way where he ended up withdrawing from his wife and their relationship. But he said instead of Kim reacting to him in the same vain, she reacted in love and “soothed his soul.” He says Kim continues to show that he chose the right woman to be with and he will remember his dad’s advice that marriage is about the other person because he always wants to see her happy.
Since posting this, Seth Adam Smith’s story has appeared on almost every major news source around the country and on various websites. There’s a good chance that the advice is so compelling and controversial that it could easily be turned into a movie (you know the romantic comedy lovers would eat this right up).
So…what do you think about Seth Adam Smith’s advice?
I repeat: Most love advice out there is absolute garbage.
If I read or overhear a “one size fits all’ prescription when it comes to love or dating one more time, I swear I am going to throw my laptop across the room.
Okay, not really. (A) This MacBook was not cheap and (B) Dramatic outbursts are not my thing. But playing dramatic definitely is! Busted.
Going back to the issue at hand …
Is there some truth to what magazines or blogs or books might be preaching regardingrelationships? Sure!
There is usually a grain of truth in everything.
Even crazy, out of this world, science fiction or fantasy stories have some percentage of possibility to them.
The situations or scenarios described in relationship scenarios have probably happened at some point for some people.
In my experience though, when it’s your long haul person, all of that Isht goes out the window.
Think about it.
When you are crazy smitten with someone and they are just as equally gaga about you, playing by the ‘rules’ is the last thing on either of your minds.
Where something you did may have been ‘too much’ with other people, this person finds it adorable.
Why do you think the most common thing you hear with people that find ‘the one’ is …
‘I can finally just BE MYSELF!’
I say this not to bash everyone in the love and relationship arena. Some actually do mean well. Besides bashing is not my thing either.
I say all this to emphasize the unpredictability, uniqueness and excitement that is LOVE. Because the same can be said for LIFE!
You cannot predict what is going to happen in any given situation and you definitely cannot foretell who you are going to fall in love with!
I am a fan of case by case scenarios and making up your own freaking rules.
Who wants someone that is ‘playing a game’ or ‘acting XYZ’ anyway?! I know I sure as hell don’t!
I want someone that is being themselves, being honest, being respectful, being imaginative, being spontaneous. You get the drift.
We spend soooooo much time and energy trying to figure out what our prospective partners are thinking or feeling.
Why is it so paralyzing, this decision-making stuff?
We have to make decisions every day about the little things: what to eat, where to shop, what to say to this person or that. And often enough we have big decisions to make too, like whether to go back to school or move from one town to another or change jobs or careers. Or, maybe, it’s a decision about a relationship — is it working for you? Can it work for you?
If you find yourself feeling anxious, irritated or stressed about having to make a decision, regardless of what the issue seems to be on the surface — man, job, friend, or move etc. — the fact is, that man is not really the problem. Or rather, he’s about 10 percent of the problem. This is quite easily remedied, with confidence, once you get nice and clear and solid on the other 90 percent.
In reality, the biggest issue for most people who stress about making decisions is what I call the “self-doubt double whammy”:
a. You lack trust in your perception of yourself and of the world around you; and
b. You’re stuck in some limited thinking, imagining that you have to get this decision right or else… The “or else” might be, “or else, I’m a failure.” Or it might be “or else others will judge me”. It might be “or else I’ll never have/get/do/be what I want.” Or… some other “or else” that’s just as irrational and limiting.
Read more at YourTango.com
Leave it to Diddy to stir up some controversy just as he’s starting one of the biggest things he’s done in years.
For those who don’t know, Sean “Diddy” Combs launched Revolt Tv on Monday on Comcast and Time Warner Cable. The network is being touted as American music oriented cable channel that will focus on music videos, live performances, music news and entertainment.
But early Saturday morning, Diddy posted a picture on Instagram that might make a lot of people turn him all the way off.
In the photo, a black woman is standing tall in the center while white women are basically bowing down to her in a circle. Diddy captioned the photo with, “As it Should Be!!!!!!! #BlackIsBeautiful”
Ring the alarms.
The comments section were immediately on fire with some white people angry at Diddy for posting “something like this,” some black people happy he did it and a mix of everyone else a bit unsure of the reason for posting it. Oh, and it wouldn’t be social media if people weren’t just arguing with each other.
Here’s a sample (we’ll quote them without sharing names):
“All the white chicks on this post look better than this black b***h”
“I see it as him telling black women you are beautiful and it’s time we see that. I don’t see the black woman being pulled down but instead lifted by white women…”
“‘As it should be?’ Wrong! That’s counter racism! That’s just as ignorant with the roles turned around.”
“Boy please…then why u don’t use black females as lead models then??? Hypocrite!”
As you can see, the comments section has gotten intense with more than four THOUSAND responses.
What do you think? Was Diddy’s post or caption reverse racism? Ignorant? Right on track with what you believe?
One day I was normal and then suddenly I wasn’t. I remember being a happy teenager with hopes and dreams, silly crushes, loving school, my family and friends. Then, I noticed that my dreams were being replaced by a sense of utter hopelessness and despair. Friends stopped being fun and school became drudgery. I was sixteen and all I knew was that getting out of bed every morning was becoming a struggle. This was the beginning of my seven-year battle with depression.
October is Depression Awareness Month. It is estimated that yearly over 19 million adults and approximately 33% of all teenagers suffer from depression in some form.
Referred to as the “dark night of the soul,” this disease is not always easily diagnosed. In fact, for most of my depression, I simply thought I had just become short-tempered and mean. I hated my bad attitude, but I didn’t have the energy—or mental wherewithal—for anything else. Negative thoughts consumed me and I sought solace in isolation. It wasn’t until others confronted my harsh exterior and stopped letting me hide that I mustered the courage to ask for help.
Maybe you or someone you love is dealing with depression and perhaps you don’t even know it! Here are a few signs and suggestions for turning on the lights and outing depression:
1. PMS Every Day: Depression sends our emotions into overwhelm and constant irritability may be a sign that something is wrong. During the “dark night of the soul” nothing feels normal.
For me, regular daily tasks became energy-draining chores. Brushing my teeth, combing my hair—such simple things—required focus. I was channeling all my energy into keeping it together—so dealing with others quickly sent me into emotional withdrawal, which played out in spurts of anger, irritation and even acting overly passive. I just couldn’t deal!
2. Fashion Failure: Before my depression, fashion was one of my passions. I loved dressing up—even for high school. To be honest, I was a bit over the top! But gradually, I lost interest and stopped caring about my appearance. If you notice a change in a loved one’s appearance—or your own desire for self-care—it could be a sign of something more.
Read more at Essence.com
“…Anyone who has ever crafted a plan knows —more often than not—things don’t go the way we scripted them. Therefore, every fail-proof plan must include a strategy for handling disappointments and setbacks. The attitude and perspective we adopt when life falls short, will determine whether or not we simply survive or thrive!
We can thrive in life when we move from scarcity to abundance in our thinking—and in our response to life’s challenges. This abundance doesn’t pertain to the accumulation of material possessions. Rather, it refers to living and thinking about life from a place of engaged intentionality. True abundance is a mental mindset that focuses on possibility and potential. It is a state of being present and connected to your real power and ability.
The difference between thriving and surviving is found in our ability to:
1. Let Go of What We’ve Lost: Despite her hunger, my niece was oblivious to the remaining Cheerios. But, they were exactly what she needed. Too often, we don’t enjoy relationships—or needed resources—because we refuse contentment. Instead, we idealize and idolize the people and situations that appear to be beyond our grasp.
The things we’ve lost are behind us. In order to thrive, we must understand that the sole purpose of the past is to provide information. It is incapable of doing anything else. The transformation we desire in our present—and future—is not possible when we live fixated on the past. Transformation occurs when we take stock of the potential for change present in today and act!
2. Love What’s Left: If we are ever going to push past a mentality of living that keeps us stuck and struggling, we must embrace the things that lie within our control and sphere of influence. If we spend our time running after what we’ve lost, we will neglect what we have—failing to experience the transformation that is possible as we build for the future. Tomorrow is a seed buried within today’s actions, decisions and relationships—we must nurture the seeds currently in our hands.
You can read the rest from Coach Felicia on ESSENCE.com.
Do you often find yourself thinking about what you don’t have rather than what you do have and what’s yet to come? How do you change your thinking and continue to work on positive reinforcement?
We’re used to media mogul and everyone’s auntie in their head Oprah Winfrey normally talks about internal fear. You know, things in your psyche that makes you fearful of being your best self. But who knew that Oprah’s biggest fear – or at least one of them – is balloons?!
Yes, balloons. According to PEOPLE, Oprah recently revealed the fear in the October issue of O Magazine. She explained that it came to a head almost 20 years ago at her birthday party:
“I don’t like balloons, and for my 40th birthday my entire staff decided to surprise me. I come downstairs and the entire audience is filled with balloons. Literally, I’m stepping over balloons, having to walk through balloons and I’m so, like, ‘Oh! When is one going to pop?’”
As she went on, Oprah said the popping of balloons reminds her of gunfire and perhaps, something in her childhood must have happened related to guns. She says balloons “really freak me out.”
But of course, not one to let something just have one meaning, Oprah’s biggest fear is one she has turned into something like a life lesson. During the birthday party, she had to continue walking through the balloons and she uses that as a sort of mantra about fear:
“There are a few things that in life, if you allow them to, can really keep you from moving forward. You have to really walk through it.”
The October issue of O Magazine hits newsstands on September 17th.
What’s your biggest fear?