Source: Necolebitchie.com

Over the past couple of days, rumors have been flying around about Raven Symone being in a relationship with former “America’s Next Top Model” contestant AzMarie Livingston. You may have missed the news since it came from the National Enquirer but the amount of pick-up the story received alleging that Raven and Az are shacking up in an $11,000/month condo in NYC was enough to make the actress respond on Twitter and shut down any further discussion. She tweeted:

“I’m living my PERSONAL life the way I’m happiest. I’m not one, in my 25 year career to disclose who I’m dating. and I shall not start now. My sexual orientation is mine, and the person I’m dating to know. I’m not one for a public display of my life. However that is my right as a HUMAN BEing whether straight or gay. To tell or not to tell. As long as I’m not harming anyone. I am a light being made from love. And my career is the only thing I would like to put on display, not my personal life. Kisses!”

Ask me something else and see what happens! Sorry, I added that last part. I just love how she handles media speculation and drama so well at her age and after 25 years in the industry. That’s pretty much the same type of response she gives whenever someone tries to come at her about her weight: her body, her business. Hot 97.3 reported sources as saying:

“[Raven's] at a point now where she doesn’t care what her family thinks, and she’s in love with AzMarie.  She’s a lesbian and wants to live that way. Can you believe it?”

From the response she gave on Twitter, I can, because that’s the way she’s always been—unconcerned with other people’s thoughts.

What do you think about Raven’s response?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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Soon prospective students applying to the University of California may be asked to divulge more personal information than their academic record and race. The school’s academic Senate has recommended that students have the option of identifying themselves as lesbian, gay, bi-sexual or transgender on their admissions applications.

The recommendation has garnered a mixed reaction from UC’s Board of Admissions and Relations with Schools, according to CBS Local. The board agrees that the question would allow the school to collect important statistical information, but they suggest putting the question on the SIR forms instead of college applications to protect students’ privacy.

Support has been pouring in from across UC’s various campuses since UCLA’s campus paper broke the story in the Daily Bruin. By and large, students believe the data will lead to more services to support LGBTQ students, such as special dormitory floors, once school officials realize what a large population they are.

“I think the numbers are way bigger than we really imagine or know,” said Queer Alliance Board member Luis Roman who spoke with university officials about the proposal, and supports its passing.

When asked whether he would mind being questioned about his sexual orientation, High School Senior Brian Vo, who was visiting UC’s campus, said he wouldn’t have a problem with it:

“I think it’s fine. They’re just collecting information to kind of cater to the population. It’s not obligatory — it’s voluntary — so it’s up to you whether you want to or not.”

Provost and Executive Vice President of Academic Affairs Lawrence H. Pitts will be responsible for deciding whether to pass the proposed measure which would be implemented across the entire UC school system. As long as answering the question remains optional, it seems the recomendation could be passed without any backlash.

What do you think about this proposal? Should all school’s start asking applicant’s sexual orientation for statistical purposes?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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Source:AZ Family

Kenyata White and Aeimee Diaz’s two-year anniversary dinner at the District American Kitchen and Wine Bar inside the Sheraton hotel in Phoenix didn’t go quite as expected this past Sunday. The two intending to celebrate their relationship with a simple night out but the night took a turn when they were asked to leave the establishment after a smooch on the lips.

“We were just doing anything any normal couple would do on their anniversary. We were hugging and talking and I gave her a kiss and we just continued talking,” Kenyata told AZFamily.com.

“It hadn’t even been a minute after we spoke and the manager came up to us and said we should get a room. That our behavior was inappropriate and we should leave the establishment.”

The manager wasn’t necessarily the one with the problem. He told the women they needed to leave because other patrons had complained about their PDA.

“Here are these men who are at this table, 6-8 of them, and they didn’t like what they are seeing,” Aeimee said. “I mean is it really inappropriate to hold someone’s hand or to show expressions of love?”

Obviously the couple doesn’t think so, and neither do their friends. Kenyata took to Facebook to rant, writing on her page: “Just got asked to leave the District in downtown phoenix for giving my lady a hug and kiss on our anniversary. We met there….I am very upset…” Soon after, Facebook users flooded the District Kitchen’s page with comments about the incident. Last night the restaurant attempted to do damage control by responding to the criticisms with a post that read:

“At District American Kitchen & Wine Bar, we embrace diversity and are proud supporters of the LGBT community. We are taking this incident very seriously. We have cultivated strong relationships with organizations dedicated to diversity. We have supported and we will continue to support many events that are specific to gay, lesbian and allied individuals. Additionally, we take pride in having a very diverse workplace – a workplace that offers benefits for domestic partners. Our restaurant is open for all to enjoy and we sincerely regret that this incident took place.”

Since the incident, Kenyata and Aimee have met with the Sheraton managers to discuss what happened. For Kenyata, she just hopes “this is now an opportunity to help awaken some people.”

I have to say I’m sort of surprised management buckled under pressure from these patrons in a major city like Phoenix, especially over a little peck. Are you shocked at all?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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“Sex and the City’s” Cynthia Nixon has dealt a strong blow to the LGBTQ community with her comment about choosing to be gay—at least from their perspective.

She was recently profiled in The New York Times and she told the newspaper she rejects the skepticism from members of the gay community who find the fact that she wasn’t always a lesbian disingenuous. She told the publication.

“I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is better.’ And they tried to get me to change it, because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people it’s not, but for me it’s a choice, and you don’t get to define my gayness for me. A certain section of our community is very concerned that it not be seen as a choice, because if it’s a choice, then we could opt out. I say it doesn’t matter if we flew here or we swam here, it matters that we are here and we are one group and let us stop trying to make a litmus test for who is considered gay and who is not.”

It didn’t take long for members of her community to fire back at her word choice, suggesting she’s falling into the right-wing trap, but if that’s Cynthia’s experience are they any more right to police her sexual orientation than heterosexuals who they say concern themselves with homosexuality far too often.

It’s interesting because one of the arguments you hear so often from the LGBTQ community—in addition to the stance that you are either born gay or straight—is the idea of sexual fluidity and that many people’s true sexual orientation fluctuates many times throughout their life. Cynthia’s midlife entrance into lesbianism illustrates that perfectly, yet she’s rejected by her very own.

I can definitely see how her statement flies in the face of one of the gay community’s biggest fights of being “born this way,” especially when it comes to gay women. Being a lesbian is often seen as more of a fad than being a gay male, particularly when the woman is more feminine or aesthetically appealing. Plus Anne Heche didn’t do the LGBTQ community any favors when she went from men to Ellen and back to men, but as Cynthia said, you don’t get to define her gayness for her. I think if the LGBTQ community wants to be able to define their sexuality to heterosexuals, they should let homosexuals do the same within their community.

What do you think about what Cynthia said? Does the gay community have a right to be upset?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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The holiday season brought with it a little bit of familial sadness for me.

My 22-year-old cousin is all but a non-closeted lesbian at this point. For years she has battled her mother, who is far too incensed by her own religious fervor to accept that her daughter is not just experimenting around with the same sex. She has a legitimate partner with whom she’s been for a period that defies most reasonable folks’ statute of limitations for experimentation.

It’s hard for me to negotiate loved ones who stand in opposition to an issue I’m so passionate about: the protection of gay rights. I’m diametrically opposed to any idea that suggests gays should not be left alone to do what they will. To me, there is no argument within reason that indicates otherwise. Sadly, the scenario of my aunt and her cousin exists out with black families all over the country – perhaps disproportionately so.

Given the large presence of evangelical Christianity in the black community, combined with our social mores regarding expectations of the black male masculinity, it’s still dangerously unacceptable for black folks to leave the closet. Even if things have improved in the past decade or so, it hasn’t been enough and there’s still very far to go.

Frankly, this is one of those issues in which black folks embarrass me. I realize that the rest of the world is woefully, shamefully behind in their religious-based myopia, but we especially got it bad.

The empiricism of genetic instances related to homosexuality aside, I think common sense should dictate to intelligent people that the lifestyle choice is more than a “lifestyle choice.” The idea that a person is just making a conscious choice to be gay goes out the door when you consider their dress, attitude, speech, their consistent persecution, abandonment from family and – perhaps most illuminating – the long-term monogamous union of two people who raise children and develop their own lives together. I can’t think of too many people who can stay in character for that long.

On a very simple level, however, adults should be allowed to make decisions regarding what they do with another adult, and young people should be allowed to develop their own sexuality in a fashion that is healthy and not stunted by one’s church or family’s own moral proclivities. Anything else is unhealthy for the individual. It really needn’t go any further than that.

I realize that I’m quite inconsequential in the grand scheme of thousands of years of faith, the Idiot Tome and socio-cultural ideas about things, but hopefully I can plant it in at least a handful of you to be done with the homophobia that plagues our community, once and for good.

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LA Weekly recently spoke with Odd Future’s Syd the Kyd about her sexuality and what it’s like being a part of the musical group of singers, rappers, dancers, and producers which includes Frank Ocean and Tyler the Creator.

In speaking on her own sexual orientation, though, Syd decided to call out some well-known female entertainers who she says need to come clean about where their real sexual allegiance lays. She says:

“There’s Alicia Keys, who’s married to Swizz Beatz – we know that s*** ain’t real. You got Queen Latifah kissing Common in movies. Missy Elliott saying she don’t wanna hang with b****es. You know she loves her some b****es.”

Along those same lines, Syd explains why she decided to come out as a gay female in The Internet video, “Cocaine.”

“I decided to do it because I wish I had someone like that [an openly gay female artist] while I was coming up. People write on my Tumblr just thanking me for making the video, saying that I really inspire them, and they want to be like me. But I wasn’t always this way, this comfortable with myself, and I remember what that was like. So I figure, f*** it. Everyday people aren’t given this opportunity and I realize that.”

That may be all well and fine for Syd but I don’t think it’s her business to try to “out” women who she suspects are homosexual. From my limited knowledge of the whole idea of “coming out,” for some people, taking that step is like running up and down the street naked—you’re baring your sexual self in front of the world to be judged and the reaction you’ll get is never certain. Granted, most people these days don’t care so much whether someone is homosexual or heterosexual, but the decision to admit who you are sexually is still a very personal choice that people decide to disclose or keep to themselves for a number of reasons. Knowing that, and admitting that she wasn’t always comfortable enough to do so herself, I find it a little crazy that she’d try to put these women out there like that.

More importantly, why do these women need to admit anything? I understand that the whole coming out process signifies acceptance of who you are but I’ve personally never found it necessary. If heterosexual people don’t have to announce their orientation, why should homosexuals? Show up at the dinner party with your mate of the same sex and let people read between the lines just like they do with heterosexual couples.

I get wishing she had popular lesbian role models to look up to, but Syd’s just going to have to accept that Missy, Alicia, and Queen can’t be that for her and I don’t think that necessarily means they’re ashamed. We’ve seen pics of Queen Latifah with Jeanette Jenkins and it appears she’s already replaced her with another one—another one being a woman. Maybe these women don’t want their sexuality to overshadow their careers. If they are gay, the minute they admit it, that’s all anyone would want to talk about. Who wants to keep explaining what they do between the sheets at night? Maybe they don’t want to be the face of homosexual advocacy, which someone would surely expect them to be if they came out; and if they declined there would certainly be hell to pay. There’s also the possibility that these women just aren’t lesbians at all (except maybe the Queen).

In trying to speak up for gay artists, Syd marginalizes women in the same breath by suggesting it’s impossible for a woman to be heterosexual without showing T and A all day long. There’s more than one type of female MC and at the end of the day, no one has to explain their demeanor or orientation to anyone. I think Syd should take a lesson from her “lesbian” role model Missy Elliott and  “Stop talkin’ ‘bout who [she's] stickin’ and lickin,’ just mad it ain’t yours.”

What do you think about Syd’s comments on Queen Latifah, Missy Elliott, and Alicia Keys? Do you think lesbian entertainers have an obligation to come out with their sexual orientation? Is choosing to remain in the closet a sign of shame?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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Today same-sex couples are now recognized in over 12 states. For the first time, most Americans are in favor of gay marriage. Even as acceptance grows, disparities show up in tax returns. A new study shows that same-sex couples may pay as much as an additional 6,000 a year in taxes.

Why? Although some state governments have legalized gay marriage, the federal government doesn’t recognize them, a CNNMoney analysis observes. The federal government is restrained by the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act. This act forces same sex couples to file separately with federal tax returns sent to the IRS.

As they cannot file their federal returns jointly, same sex couples are not able to benefit from tax benefits given to heterosexual couples. In some states, same-sex couples are also obligated to fill out up to four separate returns including a mock federal return.

CNN used H&R block to give an example:  say a family consists of two adults and two children. One parent earns $100,000 while the other stays home to take care of the kids. The working parent then files as “head of household” while the stay-at-home parent is the “qualifying relative.” With no other income or deductions, the family is forced to pay $15,199 to the federal government. This amount is $4,543 higher than if the couple were heterosexual. This is because the “head of household” classification doesn’t provide the same tax deductions as “married filing jointly.”

The child tax credit is $1000 for each child for a heterosexual couple, but families using the “head of household,” tag are not able to receive this full amount. Altogether in this situation, the same-sex couple stands to lose $6,043 more to the federal government.

There is one exception. Same-sex spouses in the higher tax brackets with no children can file tax returns with a “single” status. This makes their liability lower than heterosexual couples.

In what has to be a first for the LBGT community, Fat Joe, the rapper, has come out and embraced gay acceptance in hip-hop.

During a recent interview, the Bronx native shared his thoughts about the circumstances around the recent arrest of Mister Cee, former Hot 97 DJ, who was allegedly caught with a transgender prostitute. The Bronx rapper told Vlad TV that “Whatever his preference is, it’s up to him. I’m not here to tell him what’s right or wrong.” On questions about whether or not he believes that there were gay rappers “hiding” in hip-hop, Joe unleashed with a litany of some of the most profound quotables on gay rights including: “I’m pretty sure I’ve done songs with gay rappers,” he continued. “I’m pretty sure of that. I’m pretty sure the football ni–as is gay, the basketball ni–as is… ni–as is gay….There’s millions of gay people in the world, girls too,” Joey Crack further went on to say; “…I think its 2011, going on 2012. So if you gay, rep your set.”

With that homophobia in hip-hop has been banished.  No but for real, Joe and his Elton John moment has gotten lots of praise from folks both within and outside of the hip-hop community. Although, within the same interview he did manage to go off on a tangent about some conspiracy theory about the “gay mafia” running hip-hop.

Nevertheless many folks have come to see Joe’s endorsement of gay acceptance and tolerance within hip-hop as a progressive milestone, signifying the first step in changing an environment, which has appeared to be hostile to the LBGT community. I mean, how often do you see a rapper, whose entire image is based around the most hyper-masculine, gangster image come out and support being openly gay in hip-hop?  But Joe isn’t the first rapper of late to flex his gay friendly muscles.

In September, Game, formerly The Game, said in an interview that not only does he not have a problem with gay rappers but also believes he may have already collaborated with closeted rappers before. Around that same time, Lil B aka The Based God released an album titled, “I’m Gay,” to the confusion and angst of most in his fan base. And then there is Kanye West, who has long (well since 2005) been a vocal critic of the negative connotations associated with “gay” within hip-hop lexicon. His revelation, he said, spawned from his discovery that his favorite cousin was gay and he believes that it’s time for the culture to become more open-minded.

So with this rather broad acceptance of the gay community from at least among some members of hip hop community, is it still fair to believe that the genre of music and its accompanying culture still deserve its perception of being a hostile place for openly gay rappers?

There have long been stories and rumors kicked around about homosexuality among the genre’s biggest emcees but no one has ever actually come out the closet.  However, there are a number of openly gay underground rappers making some noise but that noise is mostly hidden inside of the LBGT circles. Bringing an openly gay hip-hop artist to the mainstream is another beast altogether. And we can’t ignore the major freak out that happens among fans when news broke about Mister Cee’s off-wax exploits with a male prostitute.  Besides Mister Cee himself, who took to Twitter to adamantly deny the incriminating allegations against him, fellow Hot 97 DJ Funk Masta Flex vehemently defended not only Mister Cee from the allegations but also his sexuality.

Nothing compared to fan reactions to the scandal, which went beyond the shits and giggles reaction that I and a few other friends had. On various social networking sites and on radio programming, fans of hip-hop broke out into rants and raves about gays and their deviant behavior, cited Biblical versus against homosexuality, sending out death threats and filling their streams with a good bit of the expected homophobia and transphobia. These are the fans, who upon hearing the news about their beloved DJ,  immediately wrote him off and his legacy.

So perhaps the idea of an openly gay hip hop artist doesn’t have to do so much with their fellow rappers but the audience itself. As hip-hop album sales continue to lag you might began to see why a gay rapper would be reluctant to come out and face the music.

However, with the record sales dragging somewhat among the most loyal, and sometimes homophobic, older audience, perhaps there is room to build a new audience. Some hip-hop artists have learned that there is money to be made in a gay market.  Artist such as Nicki Minaj have written songs about having sexual relations with other women and has become a great supporter for queer youth.  And if there is money to be made from embracing the gay community, I sure we can expect to see more rappers come out in the near future singing to a different tune.

I don’t believe that hip hop is any more homophobic than the rest of American society, just more blatant in its language and bravado. Even though the thug and gangster mentality is so prevalent and it is very common to hear rappers clown each other with some very anti-gay rhetoric, the last time I checked there were no rappers in Congress blocking and stonewalling against critical gay rights issues. Likewise, as the business end of hip-hop remains the dominating factor as to what gets heard, promoted and brought, the paradigm will ultimately have to shift to embrace a newer, more tolerant fan base.  Because at the end of the day, it’s still all about the Benjamins.

Charing Ball is the author of the blog People, Places & Things.

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Before you jump at the news that Queen Latifah came out, think again. The rapper turned actor turned executive producer made this statement as a character on the show she produces, “Single Ladies”. Up until now Queen Latifah has stayed behind the camera. But in the latest episode, she enters as Sharon Love, an on camera reporter.

Read the rest of this entry »

(Washington Post) — DeRionne P. Pollard, a California community college president known for having boundless energy in the face of state budget cuts, was announced Tuesday as the new president of Montgomery College. Pollard, 39, is the ninth chief executive of Maryland’s largest two-year college and the first since the departure in September of Brian K. Johnson. Trustees removed Johnson amid allegations of overspending and lapses in management, an episode that briefly plunged the school into administrative chaos.

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